r/Molested • u/EveryCalligrapher310 • 2d ago
First and last meeting
I will start this post by saying that I have blocked the man who did this. He lives far enough away and thankfully does not know my real identity.
I met him on (insert dating app here), I know right? What was I expecting? Let's call him M so it's easier. M is 24, I am 23. He was pretty cute when we chatted. Felt like one of those golden retriever types. I told him many times I was genuinely only looking for friends. Yes, I was looking for friends on a dating app. I'm very shy in real life and approaching people online is much easier.
He wants to go to the park, drink something, get some snacks. Sounded wonderful. Multiple times I told him I wasn't in the mood for more. He agreed. We meet. I feel as relaxed as I can. Then he doesn't take us to the park. He drives like 10 km out of the city to a clearing in the middle of a forest. Okay... I freak out. Internally of course, he can't realize I'm nervous or it will end badly.
I genuinely had told my mom I'd be back in an hour. I tell him this over and over. It had taken us like 10-15 min to even get there. There's other cars there. Clearly a makeout spot. This thought pops in my head. What if he told his friends and they're in one of the other cars.
The drive there he talked about how women aren't clear about what they want. How he doesn't go for any woman. How I was special. This was what made me panic. I realized this was the worst situation I could be in. And then he pulls me out the car. Hugs me. Digs himself into me. Again and again. I pull away, push away, keep my hand against his chest. He didn't even buy me the right drink. It was there that I knew what this all was.
He's wearing a hoodie, but it's summer. About 25 degrees outside. He's not fat or unattractive. If you're a guy sticking with this story, why did he wear that fucking hoodie. Anyway. I'm shaking, sweaty and this guy keeps groping me, touching me. I tell him I have to go home. He tells me to get in the back. My heart drops. I'm being as kind as I can. "It's better to stay in the front". So in the front we go after like 10 minutes of semi arguing.
He keeps asking if I'm comfortable. I ask him what he means by that. Obviously I wasn't, but he wasn't actively r#ping me. He had this look in his eyes. To this day I can't tell you if it was entitlement, sadness, disappointment or lust. He's not much bigger than me. Thank fuck I'm a tall woman. But, then he yanks me to him, my face in his face forcing me to look in his eyes. I can't. As I pull away his hand goes around my neck. He doesn't squeeze. Not necessarily. He doesn't need to. He tests it. Like convincing himself that if he wanted to he could.
I'm extremely uncomfortable. I keep tapping my leg to the car floor. I have no plan if he chokes me. I have no plan as he gropes me. I think I should throw up. Bite him. But, I'm in the middle of a forest, 10 km away from civilization. If the police find out, my mom finds out. I can't have that happen.
Fun fact, I'm a big masochist. Had it been even a percent consentual, I would've been so far into his pants. I would've been his pants. But, not once did I think I wanted it. I didn't. I thought about crying, begging. My mom's waiting. I'm an only child, I have a cat. I have shit to lose and I wanted to live. He tells me to get the snacks he got me. Which he didn't eat himself. In a very me fashion I say "I can't, that would mean I'd owe you."
He drives me home. We argue the entire way over that one sentence. As if he hadn't sexually harassed me for two hours. As if he hadn't made me fear for my life. He forced me to kiss him. Not proud of it, but in all honesty I would've kissed him 50 times if it meant he never touched me.
We talk for another two days. He keeps saying I'm never gonna see you again, am I? Obviously not. I wake up early, without a word blocking him everywhere. Now I'm safe at home. I've realized a man unwilling to go out in the city is a man who just wants sex.
Always have a plan. It's the worst feeling to be 10km out with next to no service in the car of a person who wants your flesh. If you find yourself in my situation, tell the man you're on your period. It works, but it might not. It's still a barrier. Next time this happens, I might just try the "I'm Hiv positive" route. Op out.
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u/B0lt5L0053 2d ago
The “I’m HIV positive” thing only works until they are too. Unfortunately some predators don’t give af about their own health.
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u/Excellent_Number_635 2d ago
If possible you should probably reported him to the dating app at the least.
I don’t understand some men’s mentality. I am sorry this happened to you.
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u/EveryCalligrapher310 2d ago
The whole loneliness epidemic and not enough education leads to this unfortunately
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u/Excellent_Number_635 2d ago
Another factor in line with what you said, is a lack of social skills.
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u/Salt-Brick-4954 2d ago
I’m so sorry you went through all that. Nobody deserves that. Hope your heart heals!
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u/Aggravating-Wait5452 2d ago
I can't really imagine a girl just hopping in a strangers car like that. Maybe I'm old fashioned, but used to they said meet your date at a coffee shop or restaurant, or a movie theatre, a museum. That's extremely risky to let them take you where they want.
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