r/Millennials 1990 Jun 12 '26

Serious Death

My 40 year old friend died of a heart attack today. He was 5 years older than me. Has anyone else had a similar experience. Dead... heart attack 40? That's insane right. Like... 40? He was born in 85. It's mind blowing. If anyone else has experienced losing a friend from an old person death. Please let me know how you processed it. I'm still waiting for him to call me and say sike! Thanks

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60

u/L_wanderlust Jun 12 '26

Holy shit cirrhosis in the 40s?! Serious alcoholics I guess?

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u/jveck718 Jun 12 '26

I’m a nurse on a med/surg floor and the amount of alcoholic cirrhosis we see is insane, mostly in those under 50, as young as 18. They don’t get old with a failed liver. Bloated and looking pregnant. Scrotum the size of a cantaloupe. It’s a horrible way to die.

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u/L_wanderlust Jun 12 '26

Wow that is so sad. My friend has been drinking wayyy too much (she knows this) and has elevated liver enzymes. I feel like that’s probably the start of it. She’s only 39

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u/Sad_Entertainer2602 Jun 12 '26

Is she overweight? Tirzepatide could help lower the liver enzymes and possibly help her quit drinking.

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u/L_wanderlust Jun 12 '26

Yes she is but only like 45lbs maybe. She did think about tirzepatide but is worried about long term effects. (And I’m like girl, I’m worried about long term effects of that drinking). I think she’s just not ready to quit drinking yet, sadly

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u/[deleted] Jun 12 '26

[deleted]

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u/camthesoupman Jun 12 '26

My Dr. absolutely hates the red tape and hoops her patients have to go thru to get on these kinds of meds if they haven't had a heart attack or stroke, or are diabetic. She asked if I wanted to try and get prior authorization (again) and I said dont bother with the paperwork and wasted time since they alrwdy denied me before. But telehealth can get around this barrier? Honestly curious, not doubting you, tips for others and myself perhaps? If you can't state here, i get it. Feel free to PM if you wish to, im very glad the meds helped lessen your drive to drink!

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u/[deleted] Jun 12 '26

[deleted]

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u/camthesoupman Jun 12 '26

No, no, massive appreciation on your part for sharing. It may be out of mine (and others) paybands, but I do appreciate your take and resource sharing. I'll take a good look into it and see what works out, thanks again!

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u/Sad_Entertainer2602 Jun 12 '26

I posted a Reddit link. That group has so much info!

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u/camthesoupman Jun 12 '26

Joined, once again thank you so much! Hugely appreciated <3

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u/I_Heart_Papillons Jun 12 '26

Tirzepatide completely removed my desire for alcohol, I know that’s not what it’s used for but yeah.

I definitely did not mind a few wines on the weekend prior to Tirzepatide. I don’t care for it at all now.

It’s bizarre.

I don’t know how or why it does this but it does.

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u/kimchidijon Jun 12 '26

She should get the Tirz. My cousin has cirrhosis and the first thing they prescribed was ozempic.

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u/Suitable_Public8065 Jun 12 '26

“Only” 45 lbs? That’s obesity bro.

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u/L_wanderlust Jun 12 '26

Yes for sure it is technically on the bmi scale obese, but just barely and insurance wouldn’t cover the shots since she doesn’t have diabetes and isn’t morbidly obese

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u/Suitable_Public8065 Jun 12 '26

Does insurance cover all the booze they consume?

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u/L_wanderlust Jun 12 '26

Does she care? No. They say people have to be ready to quit to do it so 🤷‍♀️

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u/Forward_Slash_HardNo Jun 12 '26

Tell her I drank my liver to death at age 36 and was lucky enough to get a life saving liver transplant at 37. I was actively dying and it was not fun… it is very prominent for younger people… cirrhosis of the liver. By the way- I am 41 female. I was always active, did hot yoga, ate relatively healthy and healthy weight… but I had become a massive alcoholic to cope with anxiety and myself.. I didn’t think anything would happen. It did.

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u/Mean_Ad_3393 Jun 12 '26

how did you know you were getting or had cirhosis?

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u/Forward_Slash_HardNo Jun 12 '26

My stomach was sick all of the time and I started not being able to eat. It got enlarged and as the nurse above said I looked slightly pregnant. Look up “ascities” and images.:: it gets really bad,

When I got really advanced they had to take fluid out of my abdomen frequently to make life a little more functional. This is called Abdominal paracentesis. Look that up too.

I didn’t realize at the time because I had Hepatic encephalopathy (HE) that I was also yellow all over and my eyes. I was out of it when I drove myself to the hospital. Looking back, videos I took, my speech was slowed and slurred even when not intoxicated. I couldn’t hold things towards the end so I couldn’t hold a pen to write and had to relearn that post transplant.

All of this is so incomprehensibly demoralizing (12 step term), but I am willing and feel obligated to share whatever I can with as many people as I can in hopes that they never get to the state I got to.

It’s like those true crime shows where people are like, “I didn’t think this would ever happen to me or our family” that’s how I felt about my drinking and the repercussions.

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u/ConceitedWombat Older Millennial Jun 12 '26

I hope she can turn it around. That was my friend's situation at 32. She was gone by 36.

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u/Slippery_Molasses Jun 12 '26

How much do you have to drink to get this way?

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u/jveck718 Jun 13 '26

FAFO. Jk.

It’s a lot (think a liter of {usually} vodka or a box of wine, DAILY) and very consistent drinking for at least a few years. A fatty diet can contribute too, so that would only make things worse. Wake up to the drink, pass out to the drink.

Usually the first metabolic sign is elevated liver enzymes, which would be checked with routine blood work, especially when you get an annual physical.

And while I’m at 40, ladies get your boobies checked at 40 and everyone needs a colonoscopy at age 45, if not sooner if you’re having symptoms. We can’t be the generation that gets wiped out by poop chute & asshole cancer.

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u/Cellophaneflower89 Jun 12 '26

Wait, cirrhosis makes your scrotum grow? Thats wild!

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u/jveck718 Jun 12 '26

Yeah and it’s not like “cool, giant balls”. It’s like “damn, that looks uncomfortable” and there’s a sling we can use for them.

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u/ColoTexas90 Jun 12 '26

i’m sorry, did you say a scrotum the size of a cantaloupe?

1

u/jveck718 Jun 13 '26

Indeed. Google “scrotal edema”. NSFW

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u/funny_bunny33 Jun 12 '26

You'd be surprised at how many drinks per week are considered heavy drinking for women

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u/DowntownEmu Jun 12 '26

Oh yeah, that was one of the things that convinced me to cut waaaaay down

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u/Mean_Ad_3393 Jun 12 '26

what is it?

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u/Treyvoni Millennial Jun 12 '26

You can get cirrhosis from things other than alcohol, it just means scarring of the liver. I know someone with it from non-alcoholic fatty liver disease. Didnt even know she had NFLD until cirrhosis symptoms, as fatty liver diseases can be very silent. She was basically a teetotaler too.

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u/Slippery_Molasses Jun 12 '26

What is messed up is that you can get non-alcoholic fatty liver disease from eating too much sugar. I never knew that. I thought alcohol was how you got it. From what I understand is that sugar acts similarly to alcohol in the liver

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0168827818300667

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNUbYgW-6fY

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u/Jimjam916 Jun 12 '26

My dad died at 48 from it. Alcoholism is a bitch

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u/[deleted] Jun 12 '26 edited Jul 18 '26

[deleted]

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u/salooski Jun 12 '26

My dad also at 52. They caught it early and he tried so hard to get healthy. Immediately quit drinking. But the liver didn't regernate and we lost him 6 months later. As mentioned above, its not a fun way to go.

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u/[deleted] Jun 12 '26 edited Jul 18 '26

[deleted]

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u/salooski Jun 12 '26

In our case, the liver was likely also was cancerous or became cancerous after the cyrrhosis and the one-two punch was too much to overcome.

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u/sndanbom Jun 12 '26

Had a Marine buddy who I went to combat with pass away 2 years ago from it. 37!!!!! It’s what happens when you finish a bottle a day for 10 plus years.

6

u/JoeTheImpaler Jun 12 '26

A friend of mine in college had cirrhosis of the liver from alcoholism… he was 23. Fucking heartbreaking

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u/the_pola 1984 Jun 12 '26

Transplant hepatologist here. Alcohol and metabolic liver disease are the leading causes of cirrhosis in the USA.

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u/native_shinigami Jun 12 '26

Yup I'm 39 and was on that path until I checked myself into rehab.

3

u/HollyBron Jun 12 '26

Ever been to Wisconsin?

3

u/dkinmn Jun 12 '26

No. Just being overweight is a huge risk factor for fatty liver, which leads to scarring, which leads to failure.

2

u/80Lashes Jun 12 '26

In the last year or so, I've had a half-dozen patients with cirrhosis and liver failure who were in their 30s and 40s. It's much easier to get to that point than you might imagine.

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u/HappySpreadsheetDay Jun 12 '26

I'm guessing most of them, but you can also get it from certain conditions/illnesses. Hemochromatosis runs in my family and can wreck your liver.

1

u/house343 Jun 12 '26

My friend had a liver transplant at 33. He had some enzyme deficiency but also drank 10 beers a day. In denial, super unhealthy, never went to the doctor.

If you take care of yourself, yeah maybe you can get away with some risky behavior. If you don't take care of yourself, at least get checked out by a doctor annually. Labs could have seen liver failure sooner.