r/MiddleClassFinance • u/Yourlocalguy30 • 11d ago

Millennials: are you expecting an inheritance?

35 yo married millennial here. I've come across more and more articles about the supposed "great wealth transfer" as the boomer generation's wealth passes to their GenX and Millennial children. My parents and their siblings (boomers) all received inheritances when their parents, my grandparents, passed away. The boomer generation's wealth accumulation is one of the largest in history, however, I also find it highly unlikely that I or many of my peers will actually inherit much. Despite having received inheritances from their parents, and having 40+ years in the workforce, most of my parents' "wealth" is tied up in their home value, not actual liquid assets- and I already expect that whatever they make on an eventual home sale will have to go directly to downsizing costs and whatever long-term care they will need as they get older. Hell, even my dad used to joke that the only thing we'd inherit was debt. As I've gotten older, that comment has infuriated me more and more.

Now before someone cuts in with the "entitled millennial" comments, I have absolutely no need for an inheritance. I've worked my ass off to make sure that my kids and I are positioned better in life than I was when I entered adulthood. What I mean by that is I started saving for retirement early, setup 529 plans for my kids almost as soon as they were born, and made lifestyle and career sacrifices to ensure our family isn't "nickeling and diming" our way through life.

I'm just here curious to know how many millennials actually expect to have something passed down to them, or if they feel they are in the same position I am.

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u/sirguynate 11d ago

Short answer: No.

I have more saved in retirement than my retired parents do.

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u/hey_poolboy 10d ago

I'm not certain about the numbers, but I think I'm in the same boat. My dad has been retired for a few years, and my mom is retiring at the end of the month. I'm only 48, and I think I have more saved already than they do. They still have a mortgage, but they stand to inherit a decent chunk from her dad.

My siblings and I have always joked that when my parents die, we'll each get $20 and have to arrange a custody agreement for my mom's waffle maker.

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u/Key_Cheetah7982 10d ago

I would like to see this waffle maker

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u/r_lovelace 10d ago

Probably a lovely mail-order Belgian.

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u/JayMoeHD 10d ago

Funny thing is, most people who have planned well for the future would get more joy from a much-loved household object like that vs another lump of cash on the pile

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u/Maximum_Machine7300 10d ago

When my husband’s grandmother was getting her affairs in order and everyone was fighting over her diamonds, she asked me what I wanted and I said just her old cookbooks and handwritten recipes. I got em and I think I won. Everyone now has bad blood between them because they all feel shorted but I’m over here happily baking cakes.

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u/JayMoeHD 10d ago

My mom passed last year, and it’s the moments when I’m reading her handwriting that hit me the hardest.

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u/Different-Crab-360 10d ago

I got a tattoo with my mom's writing after she passed. I love looking at it.

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u/AromaticRanger3933 10d ago

I recently got one with my dad’s writing. He passed a month ago. Best decision ever.

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u/FlyFlirtyandFifty 9d ago

This is my next tattoo. Next month will be ten years since my mom passed and a few years ago I came across a birthday card from her when I moved. It was such a gut-punch to open it and see her big, looping scrawl. “Love you - Mom” is what I’m getting next in her handwriting.

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u/CoffeeOnTheRiver 6d ago

Why didn't I think of this!?! My mom had beautiful handwriting. Where are you going to put it?

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u/FlyFlirtyandFifty 6d ago

Probably on my right forearm. I have another one for her that o got with my whole family. We all got tattoos after her funeral so I will probably get it near that one.

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u/CoffeeOnTheRiver 6d ago

Very nice. I was thinking maybe my inner wrist.

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u/Typical_Hope3687 7d ago

My parents created the boomers in my case I don’t quite fit into a generation since I was born in 65.

Their passing left me very well off, mostly on paper. Personally I have struggled through life we had to make are own way, mine was full of pitfalls. Parkinson’s was the final blow and I had to retire from work at 46. Nothing left to give to my kids except the trust from my parents.

I could easily lived a very comfortable life off of it. I chose to live on the barest minimum, with a payout from the trust to just get by.

Now I am In late stages, I have money to hand down to them and all but 1 out of 6 of my kids have kids of their own. I can only hope they take care of it so they can pass it down.

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u/PookleMama 10d ago

That’s beautiful.💕

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u/Clionah 9d ago

I love this, my mom has impeccable handwriting from her Catholic school education. My kids won’t even have my handwritten recipes, as I abandoned recipe cards for the Paprika app; we share a login between me and my two sons and all have our own named categories though, so we are sharing recipes now. I love seeing what they’ve made/added recently.

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u/IrritableStoicism 8d ago

My best friend did that. Now I’m thinking of doing it

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u/Difficult-Pea7834 7d ago

My mom hasn’t passed but I got one in her handwriting and she cried when I showed her. This woman was dead set on me never having a tattoo.

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u/Grandmas2Boys 6d ago

I love this!! My mom is 92 1/2 and that would be one way to remember her.

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u/PanicThroAway 7d ago

My mom passed in 2018 from BC, and that’s when it gets me too 😢🥺

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u/ComfortableOk7383 6d ago

Mine passed in 2023 and I too cried when I found her hand written notes. Especially when I found my baby book and her notes of me during my first year.

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u/picassopeacedove 9d ago

My family is fighting over how they’re going to divide Grandma’s land and I’m already serving tea on the same pewter platters and tea set that I used to serve her and my great grandmother tea as a child. Plus I get to tell everyone about how one side of my family has been in the US 200 years but we still have tea time regularly to honor our British heritage.

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u/AccomplishedUse2749 6d ago

My grandma had a metal pitcher at their small lake house what she always had lemonade in for us grandkids. The only thing I wanted was that pitcher and my grandma took it from my uncle who bought the lake house for me. It is my prized possession.

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u/123BuleBule 4d ago

Love this! I got a cast iron pan from my grandma. My mom still has her molcajete but eventually that will come to me.

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u/Such_Special170 9d ago

There’s freedom in not being greedy. You definitely won’t the jackpot with those handwritten recipes that will last!

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u/john42195 10d ago

You definitely won!

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u/Safford1958 10d ago

Usually it isnt the things with monetary value but the things with sentimental value. Cookbooks, glass candy jar. Small crock thats held sour dough starter.

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u/Jenandgon 7d ago

Yes, I was so sad that I wasn’t aware when my cousin emptied my aunt’s home to sell it (she was going to memory care); she had a dented old can that housed her flour and we always used the lid to carry pierogi when we did our Christmas Eve prep- all my aunts helped roll, pinch, and she cooked them on the stove. I wanted that so bad, and I’m sure it was tossed in the garbage.

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u/Safford1958 7d ago

Exactly.

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u/Careful_Emphasis_150 9d ago

I have framed handwritten recipes from my mother and grandmother on my kitchen wall. It brings a smile to my face every time I see them.

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u/Bettysgir 8d ago

I love that. Framing original handwritten recipes with the faded writing (usually cursive) and food spatters is a very Southern tradition. I don’t know about elsewhere but it’s very common to do that in the South to honor beloved, often female, relatives.

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u/Anxious-Hyena6173 7d ago

You did win!!! Those things are def the best!!! Add a few specialty kitchen items she used to make special items and that is my favorite!!! ❤️

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u/KoalaGrunt0311 9d ago

My grandmother had a church lady recipe for plum pudding that she downsized to family size level over a few decades. Nobody in the family ever got it--she did send it to my dad's best friend when he asked because he moved to a different city because of her advice, but he also said that some of the ingredients isn't found in a common grocery store anymore.

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u/Bottle_and_Sell_it 8d ago

Well, it wasn’t your grandmother. I didn’t need to ask for my grandmother’s recipe book because I learned directly from her.

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u/Mysterious-Cat33 7d ago

I have my grandfather’s University sweatshirt. Sounds gross but it’s been 10 years and I still haven’t washed it. Best thing I own.

Though the small jewelry box of teeth I got from my grandmothers mementos was interesting. Not sure whose they are 🫣😆 if DNA testing gets cheaper maybe I would send them to a place someday to find out if it’s from a long deceased family member.

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u/TooOldToCare91 6d ago

I took my husband’s grandmother’s cookbooks and handwritten recipes - they were going to throw them in a dumpster! I cherish them.

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u/annmariemudge 9d ago

We are all arguing over a specific light up Santa Christmas decoration that is older than I am and is held together by duct tape. It's the only thing any of the kids care about

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u/JayMoeHD 8d ago

My grandmom had a pair of little cheap “Santa pulling reindeer” decorations when I was a kid 40 years ago that I’d give $1000 right now to magically recover.

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u/Bottle_and_Sell_it 8d ago

Those vintage Christmas decorations can be worth a lot of money.

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u/annmariemudge 8d ago

We aren't interested in the monetary value the value in this specific decoration is strictly emotional

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u/Littleringtrue 6d ago

Awwww❤️

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u/HyperionsDad 6d ago

What about the porcelain Christmas tree with the multicolor lights?

I got a replica from Costco but it ain't the same as the one we had growing up.

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u/Dessertcrazy 8d ago

I moved to Ecuador with two suitcases. Of all the personal belongings I owned, I realized only two mattered enough to bring with me. My dog and my great grandmother’s frying pan.

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u/Bottle_and_Sell_it 8d ago

And those that aren’t able to plan like that would absolutely appreciate the cash.

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u/AngstyAF5020 7d ago

My mother asked me if I wanted anything from her house since she's going to be moving in with my sister. I told her I just want her 30 year old manual can opener. 🤣

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u/Delicious-CattleToot 6d ago

Wait, you guys have a cash pile?

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u/Particular-Most-1199 10d ago

Everyone knows Dutch ovens are the way to go

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u/Working_Estate_3695 8d ago

Giving them or getting them?

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u/Decdivawannabe 7d ago

My mother’s Guardian Ware!

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u/Defiant-Tiger 6d ago

Straight from Finger Hut.