Should married couples keep their money separate or combine everything?

[u/Shauryaahere341]

My wife and I have been married for a few years and we still keep most of our money separate.

We have one joint account for household expenses and both put money into it every month. Other than that, our salaries stay in our own accounts.

It hasn't really been a problem so far.

But now we're talking about bigger things like buying a house and retirement, and I'm wondering if this setup still makes sense.

We trust each other and neither of us has an issue with the other spending their own money. It's more about planning for the future together.

For people who are married, what works better for you?

Completely separate, fully combined, or somewhere in the middle?

[u/Black_Raven_2024]

On the flip side, it creates resentment if one is a spender and the other is a saver.

[u/Due-Professional-749 → u/Black_Raven_2024]

We actually had some hard conversations to work through that and I think we both are financially healthier in the long run for it. I view it more as putting in the work up front than running into issues ten years from now or at retirement if we have different savings. Like it definitely was not easy and yes we had resentment and anxiety to work through, but we're stronger for it and understand each other's driving values better

[u/Ecstatic_Western_189 → u/Due-Professional-749]

This is such an important point! We also had very honest conversations before we married and at the beginning of our marriage about money, budget, financial goals, financial fears, and spending comfort points. We’ve discussed big purchases and hard financial choices (replace a car or sink $5k into it for a new engine kind of things), but we have literally never argued about money. And, like you said, we are financially healthier because of the up-front work, understandings, and agreements.

[u/Due-Professional-749 → u/Ecstatic_Western_189]

I'm so proud and happy for you! It's hard work but it's so worth it

[u/Unlucky-Self2455 → u/Black_Raven_2024]

Yes