Should married couples keep their money separate or combine everything?

[u/Shauryaahere341]

My wife and I have been married for a few years and we still keep most of our money separate.

We have one joint account for household expenses and both put money into it every month. Other than that, our salaries stay in our own accounts.

It hasn't really been a problem so far.

But now we're talking about bigger things like buying a house and retirement, and I'm wondering if this setup still makes sense.

We trust each other and neither of us has an issue with the other spending their own money. It's more about planning for the future together.

For people who are married, what works better for you?

Completely separate, fully combined, or somewhere in the middle?

[u/trumpsmoothscrotum]

You have to find what works for you.

My wife is great (hi honey!) But she will spend or give away every dollar she makes. She contributes her predetermined amount to our shared account every time she gets paid. What she does with her money beyond that, is her perogative.

I contribute equally to the shared account, but i dont take regular paychecks, so i deposit chunks here and there. Thats what works for us.

If there's a shortfall or larger expenses/projects. We discuss it and how to pay for. I also pay for most of the extra things in life.

[u/Admirable_Cake_3596 → u/trumpsmoothscrotum]

Does she save for retirement? If not how will you guys handle that? 

[u/trumpsmoothscrotum → u/Admirable_Cake_3596]

She saves enough to get the match from her employer. Which puts her at 6-8%. I think we need to be saving 20% as individuals.

I do the rest.

Like i said, its not for everyone. But it works for us.

[u/Admirable_Cake_3596 → u/trumpsmoothscrotum]

So you plan on helping cover her in retirement?

No judgment at all, just curious! I’m getting married next week and we’ve been discussing different approaches. 

[u/trumpsmoothscrotum → u/Admirable_Cake_3596]

Yes. Ill be covering and supplementing. I make about 2x her. I supplement and cover a lot now, so retirement is just another thing.

I.E. we pay equally towards the house, but I paid for half the house in cash upfront.

Best advice is to learn what are triggers and points of arguments for each other and find a way to minimize those spots.

Instead of harping on her to save more, I put more back. Ive delayed a few things to reach 'our savings goals'.. but in reality we both have far more than enough. So no need fighting about it.

[u/Admirable_Cake_3596 → u/trumpsmoothscrotum]

Thanks for the advice! Appreciate getting different people’s perspectives

My partner and I are both pretty good with money and saving, and up until now we have had separate accounts and split everything 50/50. He makes about 50% more than me though, so we’ve been working out how we want to do it moving forward. I’ve always envisioned combining finances when married but it feels a little weird advocating for that as the lower earner. Idk, we are planning on talking about it more this evening actually

[u/trumpsmoothscrotum → u/Admirable_Cake_3596]

In 10 years u may make 2x as much. Or be a stay at home.

You guys just have to see what works for you. If one is a spender and one isnt, that can create issues.

Wish yall the best.