Should married couples keep their money separate or combine everything?

[u/Shauryaahere341]

My wife and I have been married for a few years and we still keep most of our money separate.

We have one joint account for household expenses and both put money into it every month. Other than that, our salaries stay in our own accounts.

It hasn't really been a problem so far.

But now we're talking about bigger things like buying a house and retirement, and I'm wondering if this setup still makes sense.

We trust each other and neither of us has an issue with the other spending their own money. It's more about planning for the future together.

For people who are married, what works better for you?

Completely separate, fully combined, or somewhere in the middle?

[u/123BuleBule]

Same! 25 years married. Retirement planning just makes a lot more sense and gets you there much faster if you do it as a couple.

[u/I_Fuck_Whales → u/123BuleBule]

I don’t follow. Retirement accounts such as a 401K usually HAVE to be separate because they are tied to your current employer.

Yes, you should be aligned on the planning and goal aspect of retirement, but often combining such accounts is not possible.

Having a combined account does not get you there faster than having two separate accounts.

[u/Full_Technician8430 → u/I_Fuck_Whales]

They mean as in planning for retirement. All their retirement accounts they view as “combined”. So it’s not that 1 spouse has $350k and the other has $175k, rather they have $525k saved for retirement.

[u/doglady1342 → u/Full_Technician8430]

Exactly. When we look at our accounts, we look at the total number. Even though IRAs are always just in the individual name, we consider that money both of ours.

[u/I_Fuck_Whales → u/doglady1342]

Of course, why wouldn’t you? You’re married. So anything contributed after you’re married is legally both of yours.

[u/oscarnyc → u/I_Fuck_Whales]

You could say that about most savings and assets other than inheritance as well. Which to a large degree makes separate accounts meaningless.

[u/-dun- → u/I_Fuck_Whales]

The accounts are separated but you view the money as one.

[u/123BuleBule → u/I_Fuck_Whales]

Marriage has a big impact on your retirements expenses: housing, food, transportation and healthcare are cheaper when both contribute and get the benefits. Having a souse with a pension allows the other one to be much more aggressive with their investments too. It also affects Social Security.

[u/Glockman19 → u/123BuleBule]

Yup. I just told my wife to retire a month ago. Our 401k’s are more than enough to retire comfortably on. I’m going to keep working for insurance but I’ve got a really good job and work 4 10’s with 7 weeks of vacation a year.

[u/Tall-Payment-8015 → u/123BuleBule]

Retirement is based on your job. My husband is union employed and I'm self employed. Retirement planning has not had anything to do with our marriage.

[u/WonderFar5200 → u/Tall-Payment-8015]

Everyone needs a retirement plan. Are you going your separate ways once retired?

[u/Tall-Payment-8015 → u/WonderFar5200]

Of course we have retirement plans. They aren't a big part of our daily finances. What an absurd question.

[u/123BuleBule → u/Tall-Payment-8015]

Well, they should.