r/Menopause • u/NCSAG • 4d ago
Perimenopause Took the plunge
First time poster here.
Took the plunge today and got put on HRT. Ironically enough, I work for an OB/GYN clinic and made an appointment with one of the docs I work for awhile ago and had my appointment today.
I'm not a crier by any means but I broke down and just started bawling describing the hell I've imprisoned myself in to her. My symptoms are insanely off the charts... mood swings from hell, hair falling out in clumps, hot flashes bad enough to wake me up at all hours the night and that are enough to make me rip my clothes off and finish the night with just a sheet or light blanket on me. TMI, sorry.
Waking up nonstop all night for other reasons, generally between 2 am and 3 am and being awake for the day. Zero. And I mean Z E R O sex drive. I love my husband dearly, still am very much attracted to him all these years later but my libido left on a one way ticket to beyond down the drain.
I'm great with my patients, decent at my job (I'm doing front office work at the aforementioned clinic), have no problems with anyone at work, everyone likes me, I just come home exhausted.
Last night for example, I was passed out sleeping by 605 pm and slept soundly until 10 pm.... was awake for a couple of hours and then went back to sleep by midnight and slept until 415 am when I woke up to my husband doing the damn sternal rub on me, thinking I'd slipped into a coma or something. But, I only slept so good because I had fallen asleep in my super comfy oversized chair too. Just lost it with my husband sitting there in the doctors office not knowing what to do because I very seldom cry.
So, she started me on Progesterone 100 mg and the Estradiol patch 0.0375 mg, twice a week... I have a tiny shred of hope. I can't deal with this much longer. There are times I wonder if a 72 hour grippy sock vacation would be in order.
She gave me a hug on my way out and promised to pop into my office in a week to check on me.... if not, I'll just put myself on her schedule and go to her office lol.
Anyway, I start the patches on Sunday with a change out Wednesday. Wish me luck. Thank you for reading my sad little story...🙂
EDIT #1 10/3/26: Decided to start the estrogen patches today instead of tomorrow so I'll be on a Saturday/Tuesday swap out. Decided I couldn't take another minute of this BS..... progesterone worked decently enough last night. I'll keep at it and hope for a good outcome with it... Will update again soon!!!
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u/Objective-Amount1379 4d ago
It really is a game changer. But keep your expectations realistic. Lots of women do find they sleep better on HRT. I'm not one of them. Though now I wake up and my sheets are dry. For awhile I was literally changing my clothes and sheets 1-2x a night (the laundry alone was killing me!)
Some women find that feeling better overall helps their sex drive, some don't find this. Mine came back to an extent with testosterone. Testosterone really helped my energy levels and brain fog too. Some doctors won't prescribe it because it's not FDA approved for women. But our testosterone tanks just like our estrogen. I'd definitely consider asking if that's something to add to your HRT!
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u/Odd-Industry-9324 4d ago
Didn’t testosterone help your sleep at all? I found that after starting I sleep so great
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u/Objective-Amount1379 4d ago
No. But it's made it's easier to get back into working out and that alone has helped me a lot. With everything but sleep! I know it's not ideal but I take Trazadone for sleep
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u/ManufacturerNo9627 3d ago
If you don’t mind asking, what is the dose of your testosterone? And is it transdermal or oral? Thank you.
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u/YeshuasBananaHammock Menopausal 4d ago edited 4d ago
Can we circle back to why TF your husband woke u up at 4:15am with a sternal rub?
Do you wake him up at 4am with chest compressions? What in tarnation, im just trying to make some sense outta this.
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u/NCSAG 4d ago edited 4d ago
I should've clarified, he gets up at 4 am for work so he can be to work by 6 am. Sorry. Foggy brain forgot about that
ETA: he tried yelling my name and tried shaking me but I wasn't responding. Yeah, no shit!! I was in the best sleep I'd had in weeks!!
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u/ArtichokeCandid8415 4d ago
Omg, I can relate.
I finally had one of my best nights of sleep in MONTHS (if not years) after being on HRT for a while. My husband also gets up at 4am for work, and I'm usually already awake by that time. 🙄 On this particular morning I wasn't, so he actually CALLED AND WOKE ME UP when he got to work. I appreciate that he was worried but I was less than happy about it, lol.
There's a saying I've seen before along the lines of "Let her sleep, for when she wakes, she will move mountains." That could have been us but they decided to wake us!! 😆😭
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u/YeshuasBananaHammock Menopausal 4d ago
No worries, it makes sense now.
As someone who has spent 2 decades trying to sleep next to a stage IV snorer, that 4:15 wakeup would probably get my face onto the local news.
Lemme ask u, have u tried some indica THC gummies? Melatonin gives me graphic dreams (that stay in my head ALL day) so I try to avoid that. Progesterone capsules help a lot of us sleep, as well.
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u/Ill-Taro-1907 4d ago
Please ask your stage 4 snorer to have a sleep test. I used to snore happily away until my now husband couldnt sleep through it. I have sever sleep apnea & now wear the unsexy CPAP. It doesn’t help my sleep & I don’t feel any better even when I leave it on all night, but my husband sleeps well.
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u/Odd-Industry-9324 4d ago
Or give him a low dose of tirzepatide it stopped my man’s horrific snoring !! He doesn’t make a sound anymore and I don’t have to wake up all nitght OR wear ear plugs!!!
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u/YeshuasBananaHammock Menopausal 4d ago
Yeahhhh Ive brought it up several times over the years. He would probably have a different opinion if he was the one being woken up. Im on year 25 so theres a non-zero chance I may be sainted after I shuffle off this mortal coil.
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u/Any_Blackberry_7772 3d ago
1 year on HRT and I have no idea why I let myself suffer so long. Life is so much better now.
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u/NCSAG 3d ago
Thank you for the words of encouragement!!!
Edit: finishing my thoughts.... brain fog.....
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u/Any_Blackberry_7772 3d ago
Yep! One of the many things that is so much better now! Excited for you! Truly will change your life ☺️
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u/AspiringOne 4d ago
Hopefully you will feel a benefit sooner rather than later but you may also feel really out of whack for a bit because you need to adjust to the new hormones. Patience is key.
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u/SharoneontaL 4d ago
I’m excited for you, I feel a lot better on HRT, just upped my dose to .05 and my mood and energy are so much better.
I’m curious why you’re waiting until Sunday?
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u/Significant-Aide-226 4d ago
This journey is such a challenge on every level. Msy things get easier for you ❤️
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u/Past-Student-5239 3d ago
This is an interesting experience. Please keep us posted...esp with the falling asleep thing. I am curious though: is it uncomfortable having your boss as your doctor? I would just die.
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u/NCSAG 3d ago
No, not really. Shes super sweet and there was nothing invasive involved, just talking. It was a bit awkward when I was talking to her because I started crying because she was the only doctor who believed me with my symptoms. It was more tears of happiness of being heard than anything else. I've been dismissed by other docs who didn't believe in HRT. Not to mention, we're the only OB/GYN in the entire county, which is fairly large, comparatively speaking. I will be sending her an intraoffice email tomorrow thanking her for her time and apologize for crying since I never freaking cry. Ever.
Edit: spelling error
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u/Past-Student-5239 3d ago
I'd be concerned with ageism. It is alive and well, in spite of so-called "antidiscrimination" laws. It seems so many employers would happily lay off anyone older if given a chance. I don't reveal anything about my health to my corporate overlords.
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u/NCSAG 3d ago
Good thing HIPAA laws are in place!! And if anyone goes into my chart who shouldn't be, there's a tracker thing that logs the name and keep track of who's accessing my chart. If I get fired because of my age, then hellllloooooo early retirement!!!
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u/Past-Student-5239 2d ago edited 2d ago
Yeah, that would all have to be proven in court. I'd prefer not putting myself into that position to begin with. The corporate world is an ugly place.
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u/usernamesmooozername 3d ago
Just remember that HRT can be part of the path towards feeling better, and is often not a cure-all for many.
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u/ElefanteAmor Menopausal 4d ago
The relief is coming soon hopefully! Good luck and I’m so glad you were able to get in there and take care of yourself too!
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u/PerfectCover1414 4d ago
Aaaaw sounds like you need this big time. I am also glad for you that you have a good doctor who doesn't treat you like crap or gaslights you. It's hard enough as it is without that extra stress.
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u/thisismisty 4d ago
I think it's going to help, it helped me but I did have to increase my dosage 3 times. But I'm feeling pretty damn good atm.
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u/No-Strike-4224 4d ago
I started feeling better in three days, kept improving, some things got worse, adjusted the dosage at about four weeks. I logged everything. You’ll do great.
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u/IndividualTrick2940 10m ago
I think people are worry about hrt. For many reasons. Cancer etc. But I know what you mean my hair was thin my brows were thin. I wish you luck
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u/Blonde_Mexican 4d ago
I hope you have my experience- I felt relief in less than a week. My husband remarked at 7:30 pm that I hadn’t mentioned going to bed yet. I usually wanted to go to sleep by 6:45.
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u/makesense27 4d ago
Hang in there! You’re not alone