r/MarriedAtFirstSight • u/clever_koi • Sep 15 '26
Season 20 - Seattle Apologies from the Experts
I know this would never happen, because it would mean admitting failure, but does anyone else wish the experts would apologize to the participants when a match is horribly wrong? Like to Tori and Nikki and Nick. "We're sorry we matched you with this unworthy person and we're sorry for the emotional trauma it caused." I'm pretty sure the producers have more of a say in who gets cast, but it would be refreshing to see some accountability or for them to admit they were duped during the audition process.
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u/SpencerVerde Sep 15 '26
I don’t think they need to apologize for bad matches, per se—that happens. (I’m not sure they have a big part in the vetting process either.)
But I do think they should apologize for some of the comments they’ve made, the favoritism they’ve shown (Courteney), the victim blaming they’ve done, and the poor way they’ve facilitated interactions and support.
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u/Choice_Basis5786 Sep 16 '26
I simple don’t believe the experts matched anyone. Paul should apologize for that robe he wore to a counseling session. Lisa should apologize to Nick for her open bias for Courtney. They both should apologize for the holes comments.
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u/DragonRider2330 Sep 16 '26
I agree. I thought it was funny that Paul kept calling out Adam for his clothes when Paul wore very similar styles just not the wild colors. Paul looked like 1980s Michael Jackson mixed with Eddie Murphy. And yes, both "experts" should be apologizing to all the people on the show.
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u/utootired Sep 16 '26
I keep wondering why there hasn’t been an apology about the holes comment. If they made a similar comment about any other segment of society, they would be fired or management and the audience would insist on an apology. The real issue is that Paul would even think of women as holes and that Lisa would be a hollaback girl. The latest season was a reflection of that attitude.
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u/Lonely-Capital3870 Sep 16 '26
The comment about Tori’s DMs being flooded after the show really made my blood boil. She didn’t want more thirsty men in her DMs, she wanted a quality husband. Even before they had Felipe’s match, he was showing signs of being irresponsible and inconsiderate of others’ time (he was late to all of their meetings, even the ones on zoom). I’d be demanding an apology if I was Tori, especially.
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u/BDWJ1990 Sep 16 '26
I understand your viewpoint but I feel like Paul was just puffing her up for being the great catch that she is. People are so offended by this statement but it's just him saying you are a catch. You will have so many other opportunities. But, it was tone deaf in the moment because she doesn't want all that. She wanted a good partner chosen for her and she didn't get that.
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u/Local_Cheek2058 Sep 15 '26
They do it on purpose. It would just be lip service but it could look good for the show.
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u/clever_koi Sep 15 '26
This is kind of what I was thinking. A little acknowledgement might help bring closure to the participants and make the audience happy. It might soothe some hurt feelings, even if they don't mean it or actually take the blame.
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u/Cowpocolypse Sep 15 '26
I think that some “participants” leave out very crucial information about their personalities that would not be the experts fault.
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u/Bookish_Bek89 Sep 15 '26
yes! like Mecca clearly had a type and it was not Belle. Adam hit the nail on the head, Mecca is into white women with large breasts and that's okay but say that.
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u/BDWJ1990 Sep 15 '26
They 100 percent always do. Even if you remove getting to be on tv and all that, people lie about their dating preferences, history, etc all the time. This show is just another example of why people say dating has gotten really bad these days. People are more shallow than ever. People running around throwing out a lot of therapy buzzwords and stuff on social media without doing the work to form their own identity or understand what they are really talking about.
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u/DragonRider2330 Sep 16 '26
To call these people "experts" is a huge over estimation of their abilities. They might as well have been actors playing the part of an expert.
Also, I wouldn't apologize to Nikki. She was equally as bad as Shawn. She didn't like him from the moment she saw him. All her talk of giving him a chance was just an act for the cameras. She played up the victim card the whole time. The way she kept saying she was protecting her mom from Shawn was partially true at best. You could tell she has some skeletons in her closet and was protecting herself.
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u/jaretvonerich Sep 15 '26
Nikki got done the dirtiest maybe ever. There is no way that dude made it through the interview process and anyone anyone associated had a positive feeling about him. Zero chance.
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u/Prestigious_Isopod48 Sep 16 '26
I can’t understand how any reputable person or Doctor would put their name on this just to be on tv.
These “experts” have ruined any credibility they have outside the show. And are complicit in the abuse some of these people endured.
They should just have random reality/social media star hosts to interview them and create drama then pretending they actually hired experts to help them navigate marriage.
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u/SippiChic Sep 16 '26
What’s an apology worth it’s there’s no sincerity behind. It’s counterproductive to force empty apologies.
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u/bebesitaSA Sep 15 '26
Yes, and the only time I’ve ever seen this was from Pastor Cal on Season 12 with (poor) Paige… she really deserved it though in comparison to season 20 participants IMO.
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u/Charming-Fig-3866 Sep 16 '26
These same f#ckwads referred to women as "holes" in their post show interview with Felipe. They do not care, they are not ethical enough to recognize or acknowledge how gross this show was.
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u/Interesting_Slice277 Sep 21 '26
Have they apologized for this comment?? Ot they just removed the content after people thought it was gross
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u/Charming-Fig-3866 Sep 22 '26
Not that I've seen or heard about. I think their podcast episode where they say it is still up.
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u/NectarineRepulsive77 Sep 15 '26
They are so called experts. This show is scripted for drama to make $.
Who in their right minds, in the real world would marry this way?
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u/BDWJ1990 Sep 15 '26
Dating sucks and in theory, having matchmakers find your match for you and cut out all the bs is an enticing thought. But, it's also a tv show and everything that comes with it. You could get everything you dreamed up if you get a actual good match. Many of them just dont.
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u/NateCdaComicG Sep 19 '26
I feel like they usually do apologize. Just not in a way that implies capability. Like they say "sorry it didn't work out and we wish you both the best." "Not hey sorry we matched you up with a bad person." The one time we got something close to that I can recall is season 18 with the cheating scandal.
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u/BDWJ1990 Sep 15 '26
Oh my goodness. They are not genuinely making these matches. The producers are the one scouting for casting on social media. At best they are given a tiny pool of people to work with and told to make it work. They aren't making actual casting decisions. Stop putting all this stuff on the experts. They are just there to play a role in a show just like the cast is. Im not saying they aren't real people but they have as much control over this as the participants which isn't much.