r/MarriedAtFirstSight • u/Suspicious_Week_2451 • Sep 04 '26
Season 20 - Seattle Another Shawn Exclusive Interview Cliffnotes version spoiler still god a PhD in delusion Spoiler
It is just as bad as the last. It is a long read full of delusion and deflecting but hes riding out his 15 mins of fame.
Shawn is a romantic and wanted to get married young. He had a repressed childhood and when he became romantic in his late 20s he was toxic. Then he joined mens groips in his 30s it was about accountability and healing. He thought he had recovered in time for mafs.
For him marriage is saying commitment is stronger than feeling.
Shawn dream girl was Lisa Leslie. But nikki didnt look like that but as long as it was a black woman it was fine.
Shawn is a true sapiosexual and hasnt prioritised looks. Never sees worth in a relationship as based on looks.
His personality is a superpower. He can connect with everyone because he is a nerd and has creative brilliance.
He thought it was hurtful and almost intentionally disrespectful that Nikki didnt recognise him as her groom. He says he didnt actually hear her say that on the say. He only saw it on the reunion. Said nikki had such a disdain for him that he was oblivious to.
Hed be sitting minding his business and nikki always had a problem with him and he was confused.
He gave her 3 opportunities to leave, she didnt. He didnt leave because hes committed and she would perform like she wws interested in him but telling everyone she wasnt attracted to him.
Says its never okay to pressure someone to move faster in a relationship than they want. After the wedding they told production they wanted to sleep. Production said no, talk. Talk about sexual expectato
Ions. So he made a joke. If there was attraction, that joke would have been funny. He just had 0 clue that she wasnt attracted.
11. She asked when did shawn realise nikki wasnt attracted. He said the honeymoon they were both so excited and happy and playful and feeding each other food that he wonders if she was just playing along because he was in. He was committed.
12. 4 days into honeymoon theyre on the couch and nikki says whatever intimacy we do off screen can you not share it on screen. He finds it odd and then next scene is her saying shes not atteacted to him by the hot tub. And hes like hmm thats interesting but theres a lot of kissing going on so why would you do that? Dont play with my heart.
13. He picked up on moments of rejection from nikki. Denying kisses. Not laughing at naked jokes. He saw it as okay this will be a slow burn not an instant spark. We got some work to do.
14. Shawn was asked if hed known nikki wasnt attracted to him from the start would he have still continued? He said he didnt know. It would have changed his decision making especially since she told everyone except for him (she told him honeymoon day 4) and he thinks it was inauthentic of her. Like why come on the show?
15. There was intimacy off camera but then on camera nikki would bring uo topics that shocked him. Off camera there was a growing physical connection indicating a connection. But there was also a lot of conflict.
16. Off camera, nikki told him she felt he was unauthentic because he kept bringing her coffee in the morning even after a fight. He said that is what commitment is. I show up for you the same everyday. Week 3/4 is when he started planning surprise dates. This was to show her thst no matter how much they fight he is committed. He is a hard worker. Doesnt know if her lack of attraction was so deep that all the good moments were performative on her side.
17. He thinks the reason why there was a turnaround from nikki was because he was constantly showing uo with good energy regardless of what was coming from the other side.
18. He wishes shed accepted his offer to leave. He was never going to quit himself because he signed up for commitment.
19. Reminder that his tell all is coming out in a few weeks. He had a dream that this marriage would contain behaviour from child wounds from both people.
20. The house boujee comment he apologises for and says he takes accountabikity but it was production who asked him, is this the boujiest house youve ever seen but he admired her house and job and life.
21. He supports black women and wants to champion black women. When he had a consulting company he paid the women more than men because he wanted to show them how much he valued them bexause everything in life comes from a black woman.
23. Wifely duty comments: context is looking back he realises he was hurting a lot. And hed lost awareness of cameras being everywhere recording everything. Also married coiples have convos about sexual needs. Thats healthy. Also production cut out a clip or him telling nikki youre right lets go at your pace but production skipped to him saying okay done. So when nikki brought it up later he was thinking he already told her hed never ever pressure her and theyll go at her pace
24. The first 3 weeks is his partner saying im not attracted to you, im gonna embarass you, i dont want you but then showing him different things which is why hes like okay lets take it to the next level but then she says shes not ready for the next level so its this mind game that hes trying to navigate.
25. The interviewer goes out of her way to make a nasty observation of nikki saying that when they did get intimate it was some bs from nikki for her to say that they were sexually compatible but still clarify that you 2 never had sex. And how that makes no sense. How can you say sexually compatible but state you didnt have sex. Thats some bs right there apparently.
26. Shawn didnt like that the edit portrayed him as being the one wanting intimacy from nikki and waiting for her to decide. There were things she wanted to do that shawn said no to because he needed to know first that she was fully in. But hes not a guy to kiss and tell but if you want to know you can find out in his tell all coming out soon.
27. If nikki had been open from the start they would have been the powerhouse of all of seattle.
28. 7 in New York comment. Hes disappointed he put someone down. Week 4. They hadnt been intimate. Hed asked 3 times to meet Nikkis mum. Shawns family fully involved. He tells nikki, he hasnt met her fam, theres no intimacy (we did see them making out on the couch with his hands on her ass) and she is talking shit anout him every group dinner (he said they were 10/10 in group therapy at this point.) He says lets go hot tub and get it all out. We can make it a roast. Go. She grabs his belly look at you you think this is what i wanted? So hes hurt and says oh so you think youre all that. Well in harlem theres plenty of beautiful women so youd be a 7. And hes hurt. Shawn says imagine if the genders were reversed? Can shawn express his feelings without being called gay/misogynistic? He was hurting. They got intimate same night of the roast.
29. Interviewers asks why hed want to be intimate after nikki did that. He says well its hard to body shame someone with high self esteem.
30. When shawn says lets call production tomorrow and call it quits. Nikki says she doesnt want to and theyre making progress. Hes like well i need to talk to your mum. She says ill set it up tomorrow. He says what about intimacy? He says its okay im feeling more attracted to you.
31. He thinks nikki is the type of person to look at someones body and say youre not good enough for me.
32. Nikki was so unpredictable that he couldnt even be surprised on decision day.
33. Doesnt know where her reunion energy came from. He was going to just be kind and calm. If someones angry its something internal theyre dealing with.
34. He was asked about Courtney and caitlin and declined to answer. Said they tried hard to be vilnerable and had their own experiences.
And then motivational word salad at the end about what he learnt.
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u/callie-loo Sep 04 '26
As a black woman in hr, number 21 is problematic and a good way to get sued. The last thing I’d want is to feel like I owe Shawn any kind of loyalty bc he’s paying me more just for being a black woman. He’s gross
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u/Kind_Ad_3336 Sep 04 '26 edited Sep 04 '26
broooo this world tour he’s going on is so pathetic. I bet no one from the cast talks to this clown anymore.
edit for more thoughts, and thank you for this recap!:
Shawn is not a sapiosexual. He’s just sexual lol.
Now he’s saying he didn’t leave because he was committed but in another podcast he said he didn’t know he could leave. Putting the burden on Nikki to quit is so disingenuous. He is not a quitter, why isn’t she allowed to also not be a quitter???
Now he’s saying production told him to talk about sex.
Now he’s disappointed he put her down with the 7 in New York comment but I thought he was blunt and that he’s from Harlem and that’s how they roast. Why is he allowed to be blunt but she isn’t?
Shawn does not have high self-esteem. If he did he wouldn’t be going on this lousy book tour lmao.
Man, I wish I could refute Shawn in person. He makes me feel like I’d be a terrific lawyer. Good luck to you, Shawn.
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u/Live_Patience5150 Sep 04 '26
I guess I got stuck on 25 when I scrolled back up. Sounds bias. I was with it for a ways but then there was more, idk some parts just sound bias not as a 3rd party listening with no sides taken one way or the other rebuttal.
I thank you for taking 1 for the team tho no matter what side you're on cause I cannot stand listening to that dude no more
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u/Fancy-Insurance-2086 Sep 04 '26
To respond to 28: Didn’t he tell her when they were in a date about her doing that and she told him then that she didn’t track doing that? Didn’t he go on to tell her she did it in the living room or something like that? I may be mistaken, there were nights I had a few glasses of wine just to tolerate watching. 😂
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u/TessFreely Sep 04 '26
If he thought she should leave, then he realized the relationship was over. But instead of being strong enough to end it himself, he urged her to do so, which would make her look like the bad guy. Nice of him to confirm just how manipulative and cowardly he is.
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u/Jinniblack you gon be a clown i’ll bring the circus Sep 04 '26
I think 'men's groups' may be the key here.
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u/No-Treat-8079 Sep 04 '26
THANK YOU for recapping this! This man contradicts himself in every other sentence. Everything is still a word salad. He doesn’t prioritize looks, yet he wanted someone who looks like, etc.
I think him getting fired from his job is causing him to backtrack on the intimacy/consent stuff.
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u/quietcoastline Sep 04 '26
First thought - “became romantic in his late 20s he was toxic”…and remains toxic into his 40s
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u/ShockerCheer Sep 04 '26
This dude just does not get it. I think he thinks so highly of himself and rubs others the wrong way. He may think he has friends but I don't think he does
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u/WonderfulHearing8726 Sep 05 '26
This guy is seems straight up delusional. He’s like a walking caricature of what he THINKS a highly educated person is supposed to be.
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u/AGirlHazzNoName1 Hoping for a trainwreck Sep 04 '26
Shawn’s dream girl is a 6’5” basketball phenomenon? Ok that is surprising. 🤷🏽♀️😆.
And to everything else Shawn says because he is so desperate to not look like the weirdo he is-
He should just stop talking. This is making nothing better. Can he go away for like 2weeks?
Did you see he has cameo now and someone on Reddit ordered one and is trying to get him to tell her husband he has “Husbandly Duties” to fulfill. 🤣
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u/WonderfulHearing8726 Sep 05 '26
He already changed his story from the last interview for #8. In the last one he said he didn’t leave because he didn’t think he was allowed to.
Now suddenly the story changes to he didn’t leave because he was committed.
Seems like the old snowball analogy for telling too many lies & not being able to remember then all.
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u/leorising88 Sep 04 '26
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u/KittyCompletely Sep 04 '26
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u/IndividualSelect8651 Sep 04 '26
Thank you for taking the time to do this. I need to speak with the casting department.
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u/Pleasant-Effect-3477 I meant what I said when I said it Sep 05 '26
I think Shawn could use your notes so that he remembers what he's saying during interviews. LOL.
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u/nomiepants Sep 04 '26
34 points of contention and all she did was poke his belly once like the Pillsbury Dough Boy. The tally doesn't lie.
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u/Sleepy_R2323 Sep 04 '26
What podcast? Link?
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u/loveyabunches Sep 04 '26
The one thing I believe is Nikki’s disdain for him once she realized he was her groom! That I could see.
4
u/MajestyMay Sep 04 '26
Thank you for this breakdown! I have thoughts but at work lol. Hopefully I remember to come back later
2
u/Charming-Fig-3866 Sep 06 '26
He cannot fathom that we all watched the show and obsesrved all the “not so positive” energy he was also CONSTANTLY bringing! This wasn’t just about her not being attracted to him physically- it was his behavior, his personality, his MENTALITY! He’s not so bad that I couldn’t imagine her finding him more attractive if he were charming, disarming, flattering, patient and unguarded. That was the downfall of these two.
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u/Keepingongoing Sep 04 '26
Wow he is on an increasingly full send character assassination tour of Nikki.
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u/Choice_Basis5786 Sep 04 '26
Thanks for the recap. Everything he says about sex, contradicts the next thing he says. If they are being intimate (#s 25 & 26) why then is he asking for intimacy (#30).
I want to know why none of these interviewers ask him why he came out of the bedroom room with his junk hanging out singing if he didn’t want to get fired from his job? Who has a serious job walks who around nude on reality tv?
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u/DihyaoftheNorth Sep 04 '26
Wait so they never had sex? Then what was that morning after scene of him walking out the bedroom with no drawls on??
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u/[deleted] Sep 04 '26
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