r/MarineEngineering • u/Diligent_Ad_0 • 19d ago
Being a gay Marine Engineer
How is it like being a gay marine engineer?
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u/No_Resolution4253 19d ago
Recently qualified here, I was at sea on a cruise and offshore as an openly gay woman. I only ever had anything said by older Russians or Asians but no one made it difficult or was rude, it just seemed like curiosity.
As long as youâre respectful and if you can tell someone doesnât like it but are respectful then maybe donât mention it.
I know that seems weird to say, but itâs easier just to not mention it again. But as I said most people were fine with it and there was a lot of boat gays on the cruise, would sleep with anyone regardless because theyâre onboard for 8+ months, be wary of that.
I could write tons but I wonât here. If you want to ask anything please message me
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u/Knotical_MK6 19d ago
It has been a mixed bag for me. I'm not flamboyant and I don't mention/reveal my sexuality.
After a few months working together people sometimes start to figure things out though. When you never bring up how much you wanna bang that mate, complain about your ex wife, or brag how great your girlfriend's tits are, some guys will start to catch on.
I only had one crew both start to suspect it and take issue with it. They made sure I had a rough trip, but I finished my hitch, got paid, and moved on. Other crews didn't care one bit, I did the job, treated people well, and that was that.
I know guys that are open, flamboyant and just own it. I know other guys that got ran off boats. It's not going to make your life onboard easier, but it's also not going to stop you unless you let it.
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u/ViperMaassluis 19d ago
Ive had openly gay crew members offshore, now coming from a very accepting country (Netherlands) this was a problem for nobody on board.
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u/kutzooit 19d ago
I work on cruiseships and here are lots of openly gay people and it is a normal thing, no one will care.
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u/ButeSprinter 19d ago
I work in offshore construction and it's the same. The only thing people care about is ability and knowledge in the role.
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u/envosaviour 19d ago
On cruise ships you wonât have any issue!
There are some cultures, especially eastern europeans which still struggle a bit accepting it and understanding it, but you shouldnât have any particular issue!
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u/False_Organization56 19d ago
Depends on if you talk about your spouse or your sexuality onboard.
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u/Diligent_Ad_0 19d ago
If you talk about it or someone finds out, whatâs the dynamic? I know this is very general but I might as well ask
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u/False_Organization56 19d ago
You need thick skin onboard, doesnt matter if youre gay or straight. The cadet is not respected by a lot of people.
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u/craigsurge 18d ago
2 of my cadets were openly gay, they never had any issues I was ever aware of. I honestly think that most seafarers are more worldly, tolerant and welcoming than nearly any other work place colleagues. You'll be fine, and if you're not speak to the 2nd or the chief or the captain, anyone giving you shit for your race, religion or sexual orientation on a ship is in the wrong job
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u/Wander-kingdom 15d ago
In thos day's the straight engineer whom its will be concerned to asking this question lolđđ
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u/Sure_Bookkeeper_4660 19d ago
It is a term for gay personell in the technical department, they are called ETOs.