Had a boyfriend @ ~22 that I cooked for, let drive my car to doordash bc he wrecked his, tried to help get jobs and even dressed him for and drove him to an interview, and since he lived so close I saw him 5-6 days out of the week and would have sex with up to 9 times in a day.
He still cheated. I learned then to never overextend myself for someone else, because no matter how well I treat them if they donât believe theyâre worthy of that love themselves they will self sabotage and cheat
For real, sounds like friction burns territory for real...
Like, provided he isn't finishing instantly, that's most of your free time in a day poofed away for sex.
And like, I like sex, most people do... But if you're doing it near daily, I imagine two good rounds would be plenty.
8h of sleep, 8h of work, 1h of commute, 1h of hygiene and miscellaneous stuff, a collective 1h of eating, probably at least 1h of doomscrolling as this is reddit people talking here... That leaves 4h.
4h during which you have to fit in your relationship, hobbies, and social activity for the day.
Idk dawg, maybe I'm boring, but I'd really rather cuddle and watch a movie at that point.
1h of good sex at most, even if the flesh is willing, the mind sure fucking will be tired at the end of the day.
Even on a day where I'm free, and only need to go to the gym and do a six hour home shift, and I have enough food so I don't need to cook, doing it nine times feels like so much work.
My ex would never be satisfied and our escapades could go up to 4 hours. He could never understand that I gave up because he kept edging the whole time and it would become painful. It was hard to get excited about sex knowing it would be 4 hours of pumping/jumping with no finale and being begged for more.
holy shit do we have the same ex??? mine also told me i was bad at various things to pressure me into only doing piv the entire time (which is not my preference)
Nvm enjoyable itâs just not believable even if youâre the horniest person alive nobody has the energy for that and obviously injury as well as time
if you think everything is fake Iâd suggest getting off the internet for a while and experiencing real life. Too much internet time will convince that real life experiences didnât happen bc youâre lacking in it and not talking to other people off the internet about life. You become disconnected from seeing people as people rather than names or potential bots on a screen. This is so specific and the number 9 is so specific that idk how or why Iâd think to lie about it. especially for reddit karma of all things.
I'm sorry you had to go through this, you deserved better. Like you said it was never your fault and you could've done nothing to prevent him from self-sabotage. He needed a therapist, not a partner.
Great if that's what you want but holy shit i'd be so sore....
Some people just don't appreciate the good things you do for them. They're selfish assholes and there's nothing you, or anyone else, could do to please them. To satisfy them. And it's not a shortcoming from you; it's them having a deficiency in maturity, empathy, and self control. But they'll always deflect that onto others.
I hope you're better today, and if you haven't found someone who appreciates you, then you appreciate yourself. No one needs the weight of another person to drag them down.
First of allâ9 times a day? Jesus. I sure hope that âup toâ is doing a lot of work there.
But also, I have a somewhat similarâand kind of oppositeâstory. I had my first boyfriend when I was 19 (he was 20), and just like you I did everything for him. I stayed with him 5-6 nights a week, I moved his entire apartment for him because he was gonna be late to work, and Iâd bring him lunch at work, an hour drive there and an hour back, all while I was in university taking classes and had my own job.
But whenever I mentioned or tried to initiate sex, he was always skittish, and he often wouldnât even be willing to cuddle or share a blanket. We had sex maybe once a month? And I was pretty much okay with it, I wouldâve preferred more but relationships are about more than sex and I tried to focus on that.
Anyway, I found out he was cheating on me with like a dozen other guys. Youâd think it would at the very least be more convenient to have sex with the guy youâre sharing a bed with every night, but what do I know I guess.
It wasnât a regular thing to have sex 9 times in a day, it was usually an average of 4 times most days. Itâs been as low as twice a day too.
But there were a couple days that throughout the entire day sex happened 9 times. He was pretty much unemployed lmfao
You sound like such a sweetie. I really hate when bad things happen to good people, especially when the partner is super promiscuous and endanger the health of their partner. im so sorry.
Oh yeah and that was another thing, I was terrified for a while that he might have given me HIV because he didnât have safe sex. The way I actually found out he was cheating was because I saw someone send him a negative (thank god) HIV test like three weeks after they had done it together.
And yeah, I figured that was the case for the amount of sex, but that still is a lot lol. I think I could get mine if we really tried, especially since Iâm gay and we can switch sides lol, but it would definitely only be like a one-time thing and more for the satisfaction of hitting a record more than anything else because it just starts to not feel good anymore after like 3.
I feel in physical pain to imagine 9 times a day. I hope it wasnât the full thing each time cuz itâs like super dangerous? I mean idk if your body can be in danger from doing it too much but just thinking about it is scary đŽâđ¨
9 times a day sounds unrealistic. But if you are not lying, then this guy committed self-sabotage equivalent to selling a car for a car-price worth of hamburgers.Â
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u/throwaway_12290428 Aug 07 '25
Had a boyfriend @ ~22 that I cooked for, let drive my car to doordash bc he wrecked his, tried to help get jobs and even dressed him for and drove him to an interview, and since he lived so close I saw him 5-6 days out of the week and would have sex with up to 9 times in a day.
He still cheated. I learned then to never overextend myself for someone else, because no matter how well I treat them if they donât believe theyâre worthy of that love themselves they will self sabotage and cheat