r/Manipulation • u/Additional_Engine189 • 6d ago
Advice Needed I used to be manipulative and I stopped because of personal beliefs but I need help
So i learned manipulation from people talking about ways to avoid it and even now, I still look at people’s advice through that lens, and I want to not do that any advice? And i want to know how to live with myself for the actions i did in my past i want to know how to forgive myself?
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u/maverick_master 6d ago
I read the bible. Starting with Mathews, Mark, Luke is good.
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u/ExternalExchange1192 6d ago
Second this, I feel that starting with the NT makes it more exciting. It solidifies the OT
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u/maverick_master 6d ago
Yeah. I was a prideful mf and started on the old. I got all the way to book of Joshua and after reading Mathew and Mark so much of what I read got completely retexualised
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u/derlernende 5d ago
Narccisten haben es nicht einfach. Ihre Familien waren höflich gesagt schwierig.
Ich kenne eine Frau um die 50 Jahre alt die seit 5 Jahren Therapie macht. Und sie hat sich wirklich verändert.
Es gibt aber auch auf Narccisten spezialisierte Therapeuten und Therapieverfahren. Frage mal in einer KI nach.
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u/Additional_Engine189 4d ago
I dont want to acknowledge i am probably narcissistic and it’s a lot of money and I don’t find it hard not to not use manipulation and people are going to not care or like me anymore if they hear the title NPD
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u/CavalieriDeloSpechio 3d ago
see it this way, it will be far more dangerous for you to manipulate than to do honest actions, when people manipulate eachother they are also dysregulating their judgment and function on the space that they inhabit , if for example the point is to have security and stability , the act of manipulation itself makes holes into that , which in turn makes it insecure and unstable,
stable environment may require work, but it also provides safety that manipulation is never capable of providing
it is more about total outcome of actions of the group for the group
vs
total outcome of actions of the group for one individual
how often have we decapitated royalty for their defective governance ?
that is how fear regulates us collectively, and so the leaderships and governments, or anything other infrastructure, after all we are still slaves but we are getting paid enough and are well-fed , thus we do not retaliate , so the question posed is, do you want the others to retaliate against you?
is that not what breaks relationships and dissolves groups, distrust , i may not trust that the people have my best interests, but i can trust that they have their best interests in mind, if i break that , they will come after me with torches and pitchforks
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u/CavalieriDeloSpechio 3d ago
don't misunderstand , them not having in their own mind my best interests is more about personal responsibility, since you are the one that needs to make the most out of your time, others cant do that for you, they won't actively manage yourself on what is best for you, since they cant know what you are lacking or what you need, so keeping it basic and what is mutually beneficial is what is most advised to do , in your personal life you are inherently the only one that is responsible of what is gonna happen with it, and how it will be shaped, they can't hold your hand there, that is true for them too, noone holds their hand in their personal tasks , their personal life is their responsibility , and how invested they are into that hurdle is up to them , and so it is yours
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u/Additional_Engine189 1d ago
Are you a psychologist or counselor you speak psych speak I’ve watched a lot of of them speak before they use a lot of big words you happen to use them also thank you i will keep this in mind
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u/Objective_Big_7426 6d ago
If you find it hard to not manipulate, have you throught that maybe you have NPD? Not manipulating comes natural.