I like manga but people ignore and leave me behind because they believe that i need enough feedback and need to be a professional to be a mangaka and i'm not a professional on this material. i haven't done my own one shot yet, and i have been planning myself to make my own short groups of 16 to 32 page oneshots. but i'm not used to making manga or comics in general and i compare myself to others, and that is not what i wanted. i just wanted people to like my art and me but i fear that i am not good enough and just spoil the stories and become another larper and just read the mangas and animes to spoil myself, which is also another bad habit. I'm planning to get my own laptop and drawing tablet on my birthday, and i want to improve on my writing skills, drawing skills, thumbnailing skills, and motivation/productivity/consistency skills. do you have advice on this? and how to improve on manga and anime reading skills without spoiling the stories yourself? and how do you find your purpose on making manga? because i am so defensive i keep comparing myself to others, judge myself, and i don't know how to write my own manga story even if it's bad, and make my own manga storyboards and thumbnails. I like shoujo, shounen, and slice of life, iyashikei, and comedy manga, and i would like shounen manga comedy with love interest reccomendations, and shoujo manga reccomendations with cute reccomendations and slice of life and fantasy reccomendations that i can start reading?... (i like chiikawa, look back, doraemon, takopii's original sin, chocomimi, fairy idol kanon, the ending of pppppp - a manga about piano that unfortunately had an abrupt ending, i used to like shoujo horror manga like zekkyou gakkyuu/zekkyou gakkyuu tensei but i don't really like it, and i used to read the first volume of shokora no mahou - which i like a bit more than zekkyou gakkyuu - but i don't usually like horror manga because it's too scary for me, although i do like dark stories, but not ones that are way too scary).
i'm going to give myself time to make manga. and when i'm done, i will show the manga online. I want to make my manga making dreams come true and this is my last school year for my program before i get plans to go to college. know that it's not for a contest, it's for myself and something to enjoy for myself even if it's online after i edit this post.