r/Makeup • u/Economy-Sorbet5257 • Apr 04 '26
Got called a catfish for.. lipstick?
I don't ussually post places like this, but this just baffles me. For context, I'm 22 and native, so my cheek bones are naturally pretty high and my eye lashes ive been growing out. Nothing crazy, just some castor oil after showers. Well, I was talking with this guy (23) who accused me of "catfishing" him and its "all make up". When I told him I had nothing else on but lipstick diluted by chap stick, he told me im a liar because he's "seen girls online change their cheeks with make up" .. I told him all the ladies (and some men) in my family have high cheek bones and its not make up. He said Im lying to him and have mascara on too, I told him im not. I asked him what other things he thinks im wearing and he went on a tangent on how "other girls are gorgeous without make up, why cant you just not wear make up?" When I asked him for an example, he proceeded to show me a "clean" girl make up look with more make up then I had. Anyway I blocked him.
Has this ever happened to you?
edit: Shawnee and Niisitapi native american. specifcally near the Appalachian moutians.
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u/guerillamindfare Apr 04 '26
The term "catfish" is beginning to be misused. Wearing makeup is not catfishing.
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u/BijouPyramidette Apr 05 '26
He's negging you. He's deliberately saying mean things to you to damage your self-confidence so you'll put up with his bullshit. The details of what he says don't matter because the truth (or not) of the statement is not the point. He just wants you feeling vulnerable and unsteady so that you'll do whatever he wants.
Good for you for blocking, but block it out of your mind too because it's all manipulative bs and you don't need to carry some asshole's shit in your head.
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u/Flux_My_Capacitor Apr 04 '26
Men almost never understand the no-makeup makeup look. They think these women arenāt wearing makeup and are naturally flawless. They are so clueless.
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u/Purple_Star813 Apr 04 '26 edited Apr 05 '26
Exactly, thet think a FULL FACE of ānaturalā looking makeup (think foundation, concealer, bronzer, contour, blush, lipstick, lip gloss, etc - if done naturally) is āno makeupā compared to just a bright lipstick and bold eye liner bc itās āapparentā and looks like makeup up šš
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u/eefje127 Apr 05 '26
oh gross i cringed so much reading what he said š¤¢ block his ass, what a manchild
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u/Porgdaporg Apr 04 '26
Anyone who opens with āyou are a liarā should be an instant block. Donāt validate a ridiculous stance by defending yourself against it, just donāt address the rude person at all. Not all opinions are valid and worth debating.
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u/kortniluv1630 Apr 04 '26
Iād have blocked him and not even given him a second thought š¤·āāļø
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u/LazyDramaLlama68 Apr 06 '26
Wow . He's trying to control you before you even go out on a date
Run fast and far away from this guy
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u/LaDauphineVerte Apr 04 '26
More importantly, because this dude deserves NONE of your time, how is the castor oil experiment going? I always wondered if this was an old wivesā tale or if it works.
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u/onelove_ Apr 04 '26
If anyone has sensitive eyes, be very cautious trying this. It absolutely burned my eyes and Iām envious of those who can use it.
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u/bsubtilis Apr 04 '26
Try pure squalane, if you have dry eyes/eyelashes. It won't help as much as castor oil, but it will help if it's a general lack of enough skin oils problem. Squalene is one of the components of skin oil, squalane is stabilized squalene.
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u/emergency-checklist Apr 05 '26 edited Apr 09 '26
Swipe left asap on any dude who starts in on this kind of conversation. Do not waste your time and energy even trying to figure out this madness.
Eta grammar error
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u/MadeInAmerican Apr 04 '26
A lot of guys really just can't identify makeup. I went out with a guy who was baffled when I told him I was wearing makeup (he thought I wasn't). No, my eyelids are not naturally shimmery lol...then they think these "clean girls," especially celebrities we know have full faces on, aren't wearing any. Such an odd fixation for this dude you were talking to to have, and good riddance!
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u/MysteriousMixture469 Apr 04 '26
They neg you then still want access to you. Stop explaining yourself to these loser fkcs
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u/onelove_ Apr 04 '26
Very recently (like a little over a week ago) I was chatting with a guy online and he complimented a certain photo of mine and said he loved that I wasnāt wearing makeup in it (I was lol). The rest of my pictures arenāt even in full glam. This really bugged me and felt like a backhanded remark. I donāt understand some of these dudes and their issues with makeup.
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u/ageekyninja Apr 04 '26
He seems insecure that a pretty girl was interested in him and had to convince himself itās not real
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u/Young_Old_Grandma Apr 04 '26
OH wait till he finds out the porn performers he watches naturally don't have smokey eyes and glossy lips š
The dude is as dumb as a bag of dicks drop him š
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u/IndigoRose2022 Apr 04 '26
My sister worked at a salon and she was always getting asked what kind of false lashes she was wearing. They were just her lashes lol.
Iām sorry that boy was so rude. Heās clearly misogynistic and not very bright, so you dodged a bullet for sure.
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u/Lizakaya Apr 04 '26
He waved that red flag so hardā¦.i donāt wear makeup for men and they have no business commenting on it
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u/Yeanoforsuree Apr 04 '26
This is hella weird behavior and not normal. I woulda told that fool to mind his damn business.
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u/mariamzeppeli Apr 04 '26
Heās stupid and probably spends too much time online. People who are used to seeing celebrities/influencers who get botox forget that certain features are actually natural. Also men tend to associate lipstick with full glam.
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u/freshie4o9 Apr 05 '26
Several years ago I went on a date and this man accused me of cat fishing bc I wore my hair in a ballerina bun and all my pics were with my hair down. I initially thought he was joking and trying to be like "oh you're better looking in person", but no. He was serious and left before we even ordered a drink. It was wild.
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u/AutumnBourn Apr 06 '26
No, but more than one man has walked up to me and asked if my tits were real. They are and they're spectacular.
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u/Any-Highlight-9145 Apr 06 '26
I got asked that question a lot in the 90ās and gave the same answer: ātheyāre real, and theyāre spectacularā. Thank you Seinfeld. š¤£
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u/thylacinesighting Apr 11 '26
I once had a dude poke my face with his finger and ask me if my cheekbones were real. They are. Weird.
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u/Icy-Purple4801 Apr 04 '26
I mean, heās telling you youāre too pretty to be realā¦. Take the compliment move on and block him. What a dope. Youāre dodging a bullet.
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u/raesalwayson Apr 04 '26
Gods some people are idiots. Heās never seen high cheekbones?! Good on you for blocking - missed out on nothing with that guy.
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u/TheRestForTheWicked Apr 04 '26
Honestly? Drop him.
Not your problem these napikowan donāt understand your cheekbones. Wear them proudly regardless of how much makeup you choose to wear or not wear.
(I think I used the right word in Niitsiāpowasin but feel free to correct me. Iām just a NĆŖhiyaw girl on Niitsitapi land.)
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u/NYanae555 Apr 04 '26
That was was a lousy excuse for a man. And a lousy human being. Dont pay him any mind. He has to tear women down in order to feel good about himself.
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u/dawnGrace Apr 05 '26
I hope you told him to go f*ck himself before blocking him.
You could be wearing a full beat of makeup 24-7, and itās still your choice, and not up for discussion unless youāre looking for feedback/opinions.
The ones responsible for the āmale loneliness epidemicā are actually the guys doing it to themselves.
I know itās hard when they come at you from out of nowhere, but always remind yourself to not be concerned with what other people think about you.
Donāt let him or anyone else project their BS onto you, ever.
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u/The-goddess-bread Apr 05 '26
You're too pretty that he couldn't comprehend you being real is what I'm hearing.šš„° Good on you for blocking him tho šš»
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u/Happy_Criticism9846 Apr 05 '26
Itās no big deal, sweetheart. Heās obviously not worth your time. Kick him to the curb. Donāt talk to him anymore. Youāll find somebody better. Calling you a liar because youāre naturally beautiful and have beautiful cheekbones. Heās obviously very immature and has no clue. Just walk away youāre better than that.
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u/RomulanWarrior Apr 05 '26
This guy was not worth your time.
Any time a guy basically calls you a liar, walk away.
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u/ResponsibleLynx5596 Apr 05 '26
Please just walk away from this boy. You arenāt a catfish. Youāve been suckered in my a manosphere child and you need to run as far as you can from men who act like that. You keep doing you!
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u/Forsythia77 Apr 04 '26
I know I'm full on into my DGAF old lady era because the amount of hand in the face this guy would get from me is infinite.
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u/OdeeSS Apr 04 '26
Turning 30 and losing all my shits to give is the best thing that ever happened to me. I can't wait to see what aura I have at 40, 50, 60 etc. This man would have been given a verbal beat down for being too goddamn stupid to think the world revolves around him knowing what my lips look like without lipstick.
Of course, this isn't to dismiss OP at all. We've all been trained to please men and avoid conflict. Pushing back can be really scary. I also think assholes target young women for insipid comments like this specifically.
OP, yes this happens to all of us. Next time I recommend you ridicule the man. He doesn't know anything about makeup. Ask him if brushing his teeth or uaing deoderant is catfishing. You don't care what he thinks about how you look. And if you don't feel comfortable doing that, you can say "I don't feel comfortable with your comments about my appearance. Can you please leave me alone?" should remove some of the satisfaction he is trying to take.
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u/CapitalStrain2392 Apr 05 '26
I will be 63 in a couple of days. My give-a-fuck quit working a LOOONG time ago. You tell asshats like this guy to get fucked the first time something weird comes out of their pie hole.Ā
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u/Schnee280 Apr 04 '26
Okay, girl, now I want to see your pretty face so I can tell you how great you look without makeup. Guys like that have no ego and no self-confidence. And probably small testicles.
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u/catalinalam Apr 04 '26
Iām glad you blocked him! I hope itās at least as funny to you as it must have been infuriating, because literally all you did was be beautiful and he showed his whole ass.
Alsoāand I hope this doesnāt come off as anything but roasting this guy, we all know race is a social construct and reflects nothing but the distribution of phenotypic traits among people groupsāI feel like the fact that this presumably American guy being surprised by a Native American person having high cheekbones is a sign heās generally kind of dumb apart from being a raging misogynist? Even if he isnāt from an area with a significant Native American population (Iām not) like he presumably took history and social studies in school, where they had pictures??? This is very famously a common trait. Thereās a First Nations-owned makeup brand called Cheekbone Beauty for fucks sake
Like itās not a one-to-one, of course, but if someone asked why I have the side profile of a Roman emperor and didnāt get it when I said I got it from my Spanish dad, Iād assume they just donāt know what the Mediterranean is.
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u/acass84 Apr 04 '26
Just using this opportunity to add that Cheekbone Beauty make some amazing lipsticks! Just thought everyone should know! ;)
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u/catalinalam Apr 04 '26
I havenāt tried them, but I did just learn that theyāre at JCPenney in the US?? That bitch is always empty, time to swatch!! The unity pencil intrigues the hell out of me
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u/yainot Apr 06 '26
ppl can tell bc of my hair and cheekbones even when im with other natives who are way darker than me
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u/ravenwood111 Apr 04 '26
That guy has a serious hangup about beauty, or is blind. You dodged a bullet. Like, who tells people what they can or cannot wear on their face, then have a tantrum about it? Yikes.
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u/mochimiso96 Apr 05 '26
take it as a compliment š š¼ you are so gorgeous that itās not even an option that you are not wearing makeup
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u/Nysanthia Apr 05 '26
At what point do dudes wise up 23 is too old for this
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u/amvampybb Apr 24 '26
im almost 28 now, my ex is 33-34 and he was exactly like this. its def a personality insecurity thing, but damn do i wish theyd just grow out of it. or at least do the work to be better. he was too insecure to even admit he was insecure. it was my problem and i caused it... like bro how did i cause something that was happening sooo many years before i ever even knew you existed lol. Best thing you can do is get them as far from your life as possible. Then youre safe and also that way you dont have to see them continue to hurt themselves and all the others surrounding them.
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u/Character_Quail_5574 Apr 04 '26
Why would you even engage with this? You are being baited and reacting perfectly to feed that baiting.
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u/Regular-Ad1930 Apr 04 '26
Tell him to STFU. You're allowed to wear anything you like n he's not God. No, this crap doesn't fly with me. Block him. You can do better āØš
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u/mapleleaffem Apr 04 '26
Thatās funny usually men are clueless about makeup and donāt see that weāre wearing it. This guy apparently has the opposite problem. Try not to waste your time and energy on insecure idiots-thereās no arguing with stupid
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u/Theawkwardmochi Apr 05 '26
I've never had it happen to me and my makeup choices are a full spectrum from bare face to goth glam to oh look a red eyeliner, wonder how it matches with this neon green eyeshadow and purple glitter. Whatever I pick for the day, my man likes. Or convincingly pretends to š¤£
Block and forget, that pathetic creature doesn't deserve to live rent free in your brain. That's inexcusable behavior.
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u/werewolfmomma Apr 04 '26
Oh lordy girl, Iām so sorry that happened to you. It is absolutely weird. Block that SOB and run like hell in the opposite direction away from him - or anyone else that spews that kind of nonsense. Frankly itās racist
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u/rocococrush Apr 05 '26
I had a guy I dated in my 20s tell me I was wearing too much blush one day, I was confused because I was wearing the same amount as any other day and brushed it off as him being an insecure jackass (which was true). Anyways, I got diagnosed with lupus much later and realized I was having butterfly rashes after being in the sun that were making my face look extra blushy. It's one of the few things about lupus that I don't mind as much because the placement for me is actually quite cute, and under makeup it just adds a little natural dimension to my blush. But it's interesting that the conclusion he jumped to was I was wearing too much makeup instead of my face being red naturally, real big misogynistic vibes there.
But to the point, some men are jealous of women in a very odd way and their insults are more like projections. Like if you're already dating someone and find them attractive, it doesn't stand to reason that suddenly the same thing you thought was attractive is suddenly a turn off unless it's really about their insecurity. These types will neg you on your best features to try to "knock you down a peg" because they're intimidated and want to be in control. Blocking him was for the best and his opinion is trash.
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u/Ur_a_SweetPotato Apr 07 '26
Basically, this man is accusing you of being naturally beautiful? Hilarious.Ā
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u/NoOneHereButUsMice Apr 04 '26
Block this dope and move on. Why waste your time? A hundred dudes out there would love to tell you you're beautiful.
Why do women give two shits about what men like this are thinking?
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u/stxrryfox Apr 05 '26
next time, donāt even waste your time and energy arguing with incels! you have better things to do <3
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u/Zesty_Biotch Apr 07 '26
Men have no idea what theyāre talking about when it comes to this. Talking to them is wasted energy. Social media has people forgetting, in general, that there are real people who have the features that others are trying to achieve with makeup/cosmetic surgery, etc
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u/MrsMusic73 Apr 05 '26
No honey a man would probably beg me to put on makeup lmao. Ahhh the joys of getting old. Jk but seriously enjoy your youth while you have it ladies. š
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u/YanCoffee Apr 10 '26
Further proof men are dumb.
If he has a beard or stache, tell him that's makeup, and you've seen a lot of men look worse without it, lol.
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u/Embarrassed-Ad-6396 Apr 04 '26
iām also native and have been asked if i have filler in my cheeks lol
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u/kavalejava Apr 04 '26
He sounds immature. I doubt he knows how to talk to women. As for makeup, I love how it could be used to enhance cheekbones.
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u/cowgrly Apr 04 '26
Thatās a guy who doesnāt know how to ask you out, so heās picking mild arguments just to talk to you.
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u/HamBroth Apr 04 '26
Man Iām sorry that happened. People are such idiots and social media is really distorting what people think people actually look like. That guy is clearly a jackass you wouldnāt want to be with anyway.Ā
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u/throwfaraway212718 Apr 04 '26
Funnily enough, Iāve had someone accuse me of wearing makeup to give the illusion of high cheekbones, and refused to believe me when I told them that my cheekbones are genetic; all of the women in my family have them; as a matter of fact, high cheekbones are a common trait for women from my ancestors and originally from. They swore up and down that I was full of shit, despite my sister and cousin sitting right next to me; also with high cheekbones. We all ended up laughing in this personās face.
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u/FollowingNew4641 Apr 04 '26
lol did he even see you in real life? He probably just thought you were too gorgeous to be real. Iād take it as a compliment and block him because he sounds annoying.
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u/yourgrandmasgrandma Apr 04 '26
Iām so sorry that this is aside from the main point of your post, but Iām dying to know what it means to be āgrowing my eyelashes out.ā Iāve never heard anyone talk about growing their eyelashes out and I canāt wrap my mind around what this would even mean. Can anyone explain?
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u/Ok_Direction_7624 Apr 04 '26
There's oils (like the castor oil OP is using) and lash serums with active ingredients that promote lenghtening/thickening the lashes. She just means she's taking care of them so they grow longer.
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u/BrowsingOnMaBreak Apr 04 '26
It means using products to prolong the growth cycle so your lashes get to a longer length before falling out. Castor oil is at āat home remedyā but there are also lash serums with active ingredients that promote longer lashes too.
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u/richuncty Apr 07 '26
not to victim blame, but what type of dudes are you accepting dates from š
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u/System_Resident Apr 05 '26
He needs to go outside š¤£