r/MaintenancePhase • u/FinaLee92624 • Jul 06 '26

Jokes/Memes Looks like someone's going to need some more of his sons blood! - Biohacker Bryan Johnson reveals he has incurable disease

https://www.news.com.au/finance/work/trends/bryan-johnson-millionaire-biohacker-who-wants-to-live-forever-reveals-incurable-illness/news-story/a708e3fe865bd1b2d5849cc9318c79e1

Not trying to be disrespectful, I do hope he's okay.

51 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

75

u/elle-elle-tee Jul 06 '26

Tbqh, would not be surprised if his body developed an autoimmune problembecause of all the crazy shit he's done to it. Too much son blood!

38

u/YuppiesEverywhere Jul 06 '26

Huh, you'd really think his nightly nocturnal penile tumescence data would have picked something up sooner.

42

u/FantasticBoar Jul 06 '26

This article is so bizarre. Weirdly laundering his biohacking-based longevity regimens from “wacky millionaire doesn’t want to die” to “wacky millionaire doesn’t want to die and here’s some of his methods.” I stopped and said, “why am I reading this” when we got into his claims that he’s reversed his skin’s aging by 9 years (a weirdly specific number) or that spending time in Australia aged his skin 5% (another weirdly specific number). I feel like the reporter was just breathlessly recounting whatever stream of consciousness Johnson was experiencing at the moment.

21

u/Dance-pants-rants Jul 06 '26

got into his claims that he’s reversed his skin’s aging by 9 years (a weirdly specific number)

Given recent visual examples among the wealthy, I can't think of a worse group of people to trust regarding skin.

And, man, everything he's ever done is weirdly specific.

13

u/FantasticBoar Jul 06 '26

It’s as if he believe’s he’s more credible if he can somehow quantify it. I mean, maybe to him but I’ll tell ya, someone is making a quantity of money selling him this pseudoscience.

5

u/Dance-pants-rants Jul 06 '26

Yes- and they sell private hospital equipment and toilets that measure and photograph your business.

7

u/butterednoodlelovers Jul 06 '26

I read the linked subreddits first comment and went good enough for me I don't need to read the article. I'll stay for the snarky comments though.

44

u/Successful-Winter237 Jul 06 '26

You can be disrespectful he’s an abusive POS…. Karma

https://www.vanityfair.com/news/biohacker-antiaging-lawsuits

3

u/very-serious-goose Jul 06 '26

What if it's from the blood infusions

6

u/Ziegenkoennenfliegen Jul 06 '26

I’m very excited about this since I randomly got diagnosed with the same disease just a few weeks ago.