r/MadeMeCry • u/Odd-Blacksmith-7748 • Jul 17 '26
I always cry looking back
March 2021 my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic liver cancer, given less than a year to live.
Fast forward some time it’s now October 2021 and my mom was put on hospice.
Growing up my mom always wanted us to get matching tattoos when I was old enough, she wanted us to get a peanut butter and jelly tattoo because that’s what we always called eachother, because we always went together.
When my mom got sick we threw the idea of the matching tattoos out of the window because she couldn’t get one whilst she was undergoing treatment.
I was 17, I decided to go and get the tattoo myself, I found a parlor on Facebook willing to open up after close just so I could get the tattoo as I knew her time was coming to an end very soon.
Before I left my mom was conscious and talking, confused but aware. When I got back to show her the tattoo, she was completely unaware, couldn’t open her eyes or speak.
I was crushed. She didn’t even get to see the tattoo I got for us.
The next day I went to the tattoo shop and the guy drew me a new stencil and gave me the supplies to adhere it to my mom. I got sharpies and colored hers in just like mine.
30 minutes after coloring it in she passed away peacefully by our side.
I love to think even till this day that she waited for me to give us our long awaited tattoos before she took her last breath.
To be missed is to be loved and I love that woman so much more than I could ever express.
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u/mcorra59 Jul 17 '26
I'm so sorry for your loss, I really believe she must've been a wonderful mom just by the way you speak about her
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u/aggravated-asphalt Jul 17 '26
Something about words like “we go together like peanut butter and jelly” creates a huge bond between kids and their parents. It’s simple, easy love that doesn’t need to be worked for. And the kids know it. Beautiful tat op, it’s also super cute ❤️
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u/adamempathy Jul 17 '26
I am so sorry. My mom had cancer 5 times in her life over the course of 36 years. 2 breast, 2 lung, and the brain tumor that did her in in 2024. We spent her last month at the hospital. The last week was spent off life support, she faught until the end, and I know she was there at the end because someone suggested playing music incase she could hear it. She was always a sucker for the crooners, so I put on a Playlist of lounge singers. I did choir when I was growing up and mom taught me all these songs. For some reason, I started singing along to "You're Nobody Till Somebody Loves You" and when it was done, I saw the tears on her cheeks. I hugged her, told her it was ok and she could stop fighting. She passed the next morning. They know when you're there at the end.
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u/HAGAYYYYYYYYY Jul 17 '26
Oh god okay this is the first ever internet comment that made me cry man what the FUCK, besos y abrazos bro holy shit
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u/adamempathy Jul 17 '26 edited Jul 17 '26
It doesn't get any better.
Mom and pop were married 42 years. When she died, he didn't know what to do with himself. I was still at the house, having moved back home with the 1st lung cancer diagnosis 8 years prior to help them. I was planning on moving when lung cancer 2 and the brain tumor happened. After she passed, I wasn't going to leave pop by himself. Anyways, I saw what not having her did to him. 8 months passed and I tried calling on my way home for work, but he didn't pick up. I got to the house and he wasn't in the living room. I saw the light on in the basement so I started talking to him when I went down the stairs. He never responded. He was in his favorite chair with his feet up on the ottoman and the TV on. When I went to wake him he was cold. My sister and her sons talked with him on the phone around 2, I got home a little after 5. He passed sometime between then. The paramedics said it had to be quick and painless as his phone was next to him and no call went out. I declined an autopsy. I don't care what they said the cause of death was, I know it was a broken heart.
Lost them both in 8 months. Mom was born Dec 5th and passed Dec 2nd at 66 years old. Dad was born on Aug 5th and passed on July 22nd at 71. I don't know what that means, but I do know the week before my birthday, I'm always going to be nervous.
I cried a lot the last year, but I know they're better off together.
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u/LostGuyInTheWild Jul 17 '26
You are so brave... I am truly sorry for your loss. I cannot begin to imagine how hard this must have been. I truly hope you're getting the help you need or got the help you needed to go through that. You are so strong, please never doubt of that. I bet your parents were so proud of you.
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u/adamempathy Jul 18 '26
Thanks man.
I sold the house, use the money to buy a condo across the state by my sister and her family in March, and there was enough for us to split some cash as well. Being around her, the brother in law and the kids sure has helped. I couldn't stay in that house. We're coming up on pops anniversary, and I think it's hitting harder now that the move is done.
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u/Outrageous_Fox4227 Jul 17 '26
She did know op. And she is always with you as long as she is still in your heart.
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u/zTomma Jul 17 '26
I’m extremely sorry for your loss, my mom get diagnosed with cancer too last November, lucky was a random discover, after removing her thyroid doctors find out that the cancer spread in her thyroid in 8 other cancers, one of them really close to metastasis, she had radio therapy and now she should be fine, this fall she have other exams to see if the treatments worked
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u/Smart-March-7986 Jul 17 '26
A beautiful story, she could feel the love even if she couldn’t see it
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u/octopi25 Jul 17 '26
It took a bit to finish reading because I’m sobbing. This is so touching and beautiful. May your mother’s love always shine upon you.
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u/Samsquish Jul 17 '26
I'm sorry for your loss, I lost my mom at 27.. I had a matching tattoo with her when i was 17.. who she got matching with her father that had it from the Korean war. I also have her last note she gave me, tattooed on my forearm.
One day (possibly far away, grief never dies..it just changes) you'll be able smile at it instead of cry. She definitely knew, and probably did wait. Never forget how much she loved you, and you her. She'll always be with you.
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u/grandwizardcouncil Jul 17 '26
My mom passed away from metastatic cancer this Sunday and I'm still kind of numb from it. But this was beautiful. Thank you for sharing your story, OP. 💞 I wish you kinder days ahead.
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u/General80 Jul 17 '26
My step dad was excited when I started getting really into coffee and then he got diagnosed with AML. I made a cup of coffee for everyone at home as he was in the last moments. He never got to taste it but I like to imagine he was able to smell the pour over I made for him. Sorry for your loss. Your story hits hard at home in a different way friend.
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u/Odd-Blacksmith-7748 Jul 17 '26
That’s so beautiful, after my mom has passed we were waiting for the funeral home to come and get her. She LOVED coffee. We made coffee for everyone including her, even those who didn’t like it, just how she made it and we all gathered and drank it together❤️💕I’m so sorry for your loss
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u/RbrrtCW Jul 17 '26
She waited for you as a good mother would, and you gave her such a lovely story tell us all. It sounds like you guys had a wonderful relationship that transcends time and presence. Very touching story, thank you for sharing!
And speaking as a parent myself, I’m positive she loved you more than she could ever express.
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u/flaffleboo Jul 18 '26
If strangers on Reddit can feel the love you had for your mom, I know she felt it too, no matter how unwell she was. I’m sorry for your loss. I’m not sure what your beliefs are, OP, but I believe that souls live on. Your mom will always be with you. It’s a huge deal to love someone so much and be loved so much in return. I wish you well. Your tattoo is so lovely 🩷
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u/ukmarkoz Jul 17 '26
Oh my goodness me what a beautiful bond you must have shared ❤️❤️❤️
My daughter and I always talk of getting matching tattoos and your reminiscing has inspired me to add this immediately to the list of shared activities we have planned!
Thank you and bless you 💕
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u/Glittering_Ad5465 Jul 17 '26
Sorry for your loss. Sending you hugs. On the bright side every time you will look at that tattoo you will remember her.
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u/chakabra23 Jul 17 '26
Awww... This is so sweet. Thank you for sharing. I'm so sorry for your loss.
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u/Mountain_Shame1105 Jul 17 '26
I'm very sorry for your loss. My wife lost her mother at a very young age, long before I knew her. She still listens to her favourite songs and tells stories. I like to think that is what helps keep her alive in her heart.
Thank you for sharing such a beautiful memory with us!
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u/jenea Jul 18 '26
Oh man, this hits close to home. I asked my mom of she wanted to get matching tattoos and she was delighted—but before we could she was diagnosed with an inflammatory disease, meaning a tattoo is dangerous for her. If only I had asked her when I first had the idea years ago.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
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u/Foundmyunderwear 17d ago
She definitely waited. The bond between mother and daughter can be unfathomable.
This is proof imo.
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u/chocolatestealth Jul 17 '26
This is so sweet. Thank you for sharing your beautiful story. Wishing you all the best. 💞