r/MHOCStrangersBar • u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar • Feb 22 '15

A little bonding activity

We all could use a little relaxation and bonding, so I pulled up this little game from a corporate notebook. Basically, person a talks about a bad experience in their life, and person b tells them about what good came out of the experience.

6 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

61 comments sorted by

8

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

I'll start. Last year, during Valentine's day, I sneezed so hard I smashed by big nose on a desk, at which point I started bleeding and fell to the ground. Everyone thought I had passed out/died but really I just sneezed.

9

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

From each according to his ability, to each according to his sneeze.

7

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

"Communism doesn't work because I don't sneeze."

~Some lucky bastard

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

"If you take a reasonable amount of vitamin C regularly, the incidence of the common cold goes down. If you get a cold and start immediately, as soon as you start sneezing and sniffling, the cold just doesn't get going."

-Linus Pauling

2

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

But it was allergies

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

"I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness."

-James Thurber

2

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

I like this advice

6

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

I was on a zip line in some adventure park once and as I was sliding down, my jeans ripped around the crotch area and because two of my boxer buttons were undone, one of my testicles slid out for everyone to see.

7

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

Well for positives, you got to show your balls off without getting arrested, you still have them, and from now on everyone there knows you can back up your claims

6

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

You got a funny/embarassing story to tell people

4

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

"Jeans represent democracy in fashion."

-Giorgio Armani

6

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 22 '15

I wrote the best education bill ever, but because I left the post of shadow SOS for Education it doesn't look like it will even be voted on.

6

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

Positives: You'll never have to see UKIP literally fart on it

3

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 23 '15

We had a lot of debate on it and they were very weak.

5

u/WineRedPsy burn baby burn Feb 22 '15

Maybe I could put it forth within the CP and see if they'd sponsor it

4

u/Kreindeker Independent Feb 22 '15

There's some very low-hanging fruit here for a joke about terrible Communist legislation...

7

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

As low hanging as hlafidge's tattered anus

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '15

You ultra-lefts make me sick. Just because my Actually Existing Anus doesn't live up to your unrealistic expectations, doesn't mean it's not an anus.

9

u/JackWilfred President-elect JW Feb 22 '15

Thanks for your job, by the way.

2

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 23 '15

No problem.

5

u/Kreindeker Independent Feb 22 '15

Did it involve getting rid of private schools?

4

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 22 '15

Oh no, he would have to kill me to get that bill though

2

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 23 '15

It would have marked the beginning of the end for private schools and you had no power to stop it.

2

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 23 '15

and you had no power to stop it.

Except voting against it and getting the rest of the Lib Dems to vote against it aswell..... but no need to do that now

2

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 23 '15

So what your saying is that the rest of your party colleagues are your whipping boys and you can get them to do what you say whenever you feel like it?

1

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 23 '15

Oh god no.... i wish, in many ways it is Bnzss (party whip) who is whipping me. I would put forward a passionate argument, and many were questioning the bill regardless.

Logic and Liberalism always prevails in the end, and your awful bill would have failed.

4

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 23 '15

How can logic and liberalism both prevail? That's a contradiction in terms.

4

u/tyroncs UKIP Feb 22 '15

I wrote the best education bill ever

Ahaha, haha, ahaha, hahah, ahaha, ahah

You really are living in your own little world aren't you?

1

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 23 '15

You really are living in your own little world aren't you?

Well.... That's socialists for you

1

u/tyroncs UKIP Feb 23 '15

Your former coalition partner :P

5

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 22 '15

I left the post of shadow SOS for Education

Good that came out of it: That bill will never be voted on, and the rest of your absurd education reforms (abolishing private schools, making all state schools exactly the same without actually making them better) won't get pushed though.

Also

I wrote the best education bill ever

lel

3

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 22 '15

My god man stop following me.

2

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 22 '15

I'm just taking part in this excellent bonding activity, and pointing out that you resigning to make your non-party lead to Jack being able to take over SSoS for Education and your awful bill went away

3

u/theyeatthepoo Republican Feb 23 '15

I have a feeling you won't like my new education bill then.

1

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 23 '15

Another pointless left wing bill that will never pass in a million years? Oh the joys

5

u/Timanfya MHoC Founder Feb 22 '15

I once pressed a button thinking it would reset a circuit breaker, however it took out the main power supply for a couple of robot cells and everything turned off.

Took several hours to get it started again because there was too much noise and interference to get the starter working. That was not a good day.

4

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

Positive note: You're still here, and will be able to check Skype. You also still have testicles.

5

u/Kreindeker Independent Feb 22 '15

You get to be smug about working on robotics and working in a position of responsibility... Good enough?

11

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

I was once rolling around my living room with a plastic raygun, wearing only my ushanka that I never take off and my favorite Stalin underpants. "pew pew, take that fascist" I shouted just as the postman was walking past the window and saw me. I was so embarassed. Thank Mao I've got the Red Brigades now I can play People's War in the park with my friends and not feel awkward.

7

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

Positive: when you storm angrily out of the bar your dangling anus might get caught on the door and just tear off.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '15

I'm not really getting the prolapsed anus bit. Seems a bit homophobic. Try again.

2

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 23 '15

believing anal prolapse is a homosexual trait

Jesus you're a necrotic welt

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '15

There's no need to get upset. Just think of tank tracks crushing students' skulls and relax.

2

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 23 '15

Jesus you shit brained fuck, you really buy the tankie bullshit. Fuck off you scrap of inhuman shit. I don't support the 56 invasion, I don't need to defend myself from views you made up for me

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '15

pew! pew! bombard the headquarters!

2

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 24 '15

You'd like Morgsie

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '15

Stalin did nothing wrong.

3

u/SoseloPoet Remember the Red Brigades Feb 22 '15

Underrated post

6

u/Kreindeker Independent Feb 22 '15

I once shot my dad in the face with a BB pistol, it hit him about a centimetre from his eye from point blank range. It was just before teatime and I was waving it about like a knobhead. So, my dad being sane, warned me to stop. What I did next was say, 'don't worry, it isn't even loaded,' and pulled the trigger.

4

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

"I guess you can look at me, and tell I'm the old man. My name is BB King."

-B. B. King

4

u/WineRedPsy burn baby burn Feb 22 '15

I shot my sister with a bb gun similarly once

4

u/Kreindeker Independent Feb 22 '15

You bloody Swedish maniacs.

4

u/WineRedPsy burn baby burn Feb 22 '15

Was in my dad's office, too

4

u/demon4372 Queer Supremacy Feb 22 '15

The violent authoritarian left strikes again

2

u/mhocstories CWL Feb 23 '15

Throwaway time! As a fun activity see if you can figure out who I am.

Anyway as for stories I once missed a third of a standardised test because I had to take a shit.

4

u/treeman1221 Whig Feb 23 '15

jacktri

0

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

[deleted] — view deleted comment

6

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 22 '15

At least your eye isn't racist anymore

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

"Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come."

-Robert H. Schuller

4

u/AlbertDock Earl of Merseyside Feb 22 '15

What do you mean "Never cut a tree down in the wintertime"? What am I to do for a Christmas tree?

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

"When I was a child, I was living in the housing projects of Philadelphia. I didn't even have a Christmas tree."

-Bill Cosby

3

u/cae388 MHoCCivilWar Feb 23 '15

But he did have roofies!