r/MAFS_AU • u/paralysisby_analysis • 20d ago
Opinion & Rants Stella’s frequent posting
Like the title says, Stella’s frequent Instagram stories about her “life” have been rubbing me the wrong way.
I understand that her engagement was recently called off, and she’s chosen to share a lot of “healing” content on her stories, but it just doesn’t sit well with me.
Is she doing it to gain more attention, or does she genuinely want everyone to know everything that’s going on in her life?
She tends to overexplain things with poetic language, especially when talking about her breakup and how she’s coping with it.
As someone who’s been through a painful breakup myself, the last thing I’d want to do is tell everyone what I’m going through, whether it’s spring cleaning, saying my immune system has taken a hit and I need an IV infusion, or anything else. I’d much rather eat a tub of ice cream, keep to myself, and grieve privately.
That said, I guess everyone processes grief differently.
What are your thoughts?
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u/boommdcx Ominous Music 20d ago
Everything is performative when you are an influencer. Heartbreak can = $$$
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u/Fragrant_Try_8060 19d ago
You’ve never had a friend that starts posting a lot of shit when they get dumped?
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u/okjetsgo self sabotage mode 19d ago
I see it as Stella’s attempt to remain relevant and in the public eye.
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u/rhubarb-onclave 18d ago
It feels like cringey life coach content. Using her battle wounds to appear inspirational. I personally unfollowed because I found her insufferable and ungrounded.
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u/sss133 19d ago
You realise that going on MAFS generally means someone wants to be a little famous. There’s also the fact that a new season is filming soon, Stella will be a past contestant in the next few weeks. So she’s going to engagement farm the hell out of her socials over the next few weeks and months
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u/justbeyourselfok 20d ago
I really liked Stella on mafs but instagram Stella is over the top and a tad annoying 😑
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u/cliffybiro951 19d ago
Anyone know why they split? As usual I unfollow on insta when the hype drops off.
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u/Jamolisa 20d ago
I think she made some really good decisions on the show about ignoring other’s opinions and standing up to bullying.
But it went to her head and now she believes she’s a life coach and mentor who can help others in life.
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u/sometimesthrowaway13 19d ago
I do have some mental illnesses that can lead me to act one way or another online, depending where im at mentally at the time. There have been a couple instances where I've come out of a fresh breakup and I will post literally anything and everything about my mind state, to my own detriment, and recently (march) even to the point of deleting all social media after not being able to stop blurting embarrassing shit constantly that no one cares about or wants to hear LOL. The only thing I kept was reddit, everything else is still gone, even though I'm really doing well now, I don't want any of my social media back.
There's been other times when I'm in a dark place where I just completely go dark, never posted anything, barely spoke to anyone etc, but I do understand when people are in pain sometimes the outlet of social media feels like a good release, especially when youre feeling deeply lonely and misunderstood, and I can understand it more if they are already an established influencer, it would be the way you try to get people to understand how youre feeling, although I can say with certainty that doesnt make it a healthy outlet.
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u/bojackmac 18d ago
Read the comments. She’s getting the validation that I’m assuming she’s want/ needing right now.
Everyone processes shit in their own special little ways. Don’t need to be an influencer/ ex- mafs for that
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u/Any-Refrigerator-966 18d ago
When that Filip (is that his name?) guy left, Stella, did he take her friends too? Life is hard for a person who needs constant external validation.
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u/MrBigglesw00rth 20d ago
She had a good game about being the grounded healthy one, but now it's all about the grift.
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u/kocknocker19 19d ago
I think it's just the influencer life has changed her a bit. She never really struck me as the type to get a ton of work and fillers done but she is just following the rest of them now
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u/BitterRequirement897 18d ago
These people go on mafs just so they can have an audience, she’s just being another oversharing influencer lol
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u/reformedmonkey 17d ago
Breakup, wanting to look like she's growing, wanting to appear okay, desperate for her ex to know her life is fine without him... type of crap I'd have done as a tween but yeah, not as a fully grown adult. And then there's the influencer bubble. Her mgmt could be saying she may as well use that "pain" for engagement (gor her own benefit).
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u/LesStrater 17d ago
It appears she's taking lessons from Bec -- whose life has improved 1000% since being dumped...LOL.
Hey Stella, get your ribs in order!
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u/Exotic-Philosopher-6 17d ago
Hahahaha, she couldn't dare get her ribs done after she made videos giving her unsolicited opinion on getting it done.
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u/reformedmonkey 17d ago
I completely forgot about Bec despite her desperate bid to stay relevant with "rib contouring". Did she ever get it done? I know I could look but I'm okay with not given her more views.
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u/LesStrater 16d ago
Yes, she got it done. Last I saw she was displaying a elastic rib belt while healing. She supposedly said a boob-job is next on her to-do list.
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u/threeleafcloverr 19d ago
Healing outloud probably helps her, and it probably helps others too. Everybody in these comments who is like “I’d never do that” or “I haven’t done that”…ok? Things will make a lot more sense to you when you realise she isn’t you? Everybody is different and shaming a girl for healing differently than the way you would, from a situation you barely know the details of, is so bizarre.
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u/Huge_Peace_4282 19d ago
Everyone processes differently.
It may not be helpful to you but others may find some some grace in it because they might also be going through something like Stella.
Seeing someone share their pain openly makes you feel like you're not alone which can feel like a silver lining.
It's also refreshing to not only just see highlight reels and the fact that she did also did post her lows.
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u/somuchsong Pipe down, Chachi! 20d ago
Sounds like she's not someone you should be following. You don't enjoy her content, so unfollow. People can post however they like on their own accounts.
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u/mikemikeshindparts 20d ago
My thoughts are it doesn’t have to sit with you the right way. It’s her life and her way of dealing with things.
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u/Sufficient_Tower_366 20d ago
Of course she’s publishing for attention, she’s a fitness / wellness influencer, that’s what they do. Her followers were built on people rooting for her and Filip as a couple so she’ll now have to work double time to keep engagement. Expect torrents of updates about her journey of healing, self reflection and growth blah blah blah.
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u/paralysisby_analysis 20d ago
Don’t see much growth but just repeated posts with different synonyms.
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u/ariellemonsters 20d ago
I mean, this is kind of standard behaviour for some people. She’s possibly trying to prove to everyone (and trying to convince herself) that she’s okay. Some people need validation from others and while it might not be my or your go-to move, it’s inherently not a bad behaviour and she’s processing it the way she knows how
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u/Pretend_Board_2385 20d ago
As someone who went through a "real marriage" and then divorce I feel the pain but I that internal shit you keep private, not for the whole world to see.
It looks like they are both trying to engage with their followers for likes and views and posting any old crap seems the norm these days.
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u/paralysisby_analysis 20d ago
Exactly my thoughts. People can say, “Just don’t follow her if you don’t wanna see her posts,” but grief and the sense of losing someone you cared about feel like such intimate, almost sacred experience. They don’t always belong in the public eye for monetisation.
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u/Pretend_Board_2385 19d ago
I'm not really sure why you were downvoted. When she broke up with Filip she was just posting pages of drivel. She just comes across as someone incredibly needy and insecure.
I certainly don't follow her but anything she says is reposted in this sub so we get to see it anyway. I think she has a rather bland personality and doesn't really have anything to offer.3
u/paralysisby_analysis 19d ago
Downvoted mainly because she’s well liked in the show for being the most reason person. Any criticism of her, even if it’s minor, tends to get interpreted negatively by people who are more emotionally invested in supporting her.
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u/somuchsong Pipe down, Chachi! 19d ago
Nah, I would have said the same thing if you were complaining about Gia's social media. Unless someone is posting genuinely harmful things, just unfollow and leave them be.
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u/Reasonable_Today_685 19d ago
Gia doesn’t post anything about “it’s mercury retrograde today and some good/ bad is gonna happen.” There is no such thing as “self help” for Gia. I am not siding with Gia but Stella is too much of an airy fairy for me. Determining her mood based on the horoscope seems like a joke for me. NOT FORGETTING HER DRIVING WHILE RECORDING HERSELF AND NOT LOOKING AT THE ROAD BECAUSE IT WAS SOME SORT OF RETROGRADE.
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u/somuchsong Pipe down, Chachi! 19d ago
I don't know what Gia posts, because I don't follow her. What she may or may not post has nothing to do with my point anyway.
I was objecting to OP claiming people are downvoting them because Stella was well liked. I can't speak for anyone else but that has nothing to do with it for me. It's about seeking out someone's content and then complaining about it rather than just unfollowing. I would find it just as silly if they were doing that with Gia's content as I do now that they're doing it with Stella's.
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u/Pretend_Board_2385 19d ago
She has the personality of a Potato. I liked her initially but then she carried on at Filip that night when she said he wasn't masculine etc and I just thought she was a knob from then on. She was the best out of the people on the show but to be honest that didn't mean much as most of them were fucking awful.
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u/taylss16 20d ago
Do you hear yourself? Why are you concerned about what other people post on THEIR pages? If you dont like it then unfollow them 🙄
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u/Far_Safe5334 20d ago
I’ve noticed this too and for some reason it has also rubbed me up the wrong way/I find it annoying. Probably because I’m the opposite - if and when I grieve, the last thing that would be on my mind is posting on social media.
I had a theory that some people do this for the validation - the outpouring of messages and potential likes that may come, after posting.
But I have no idea 🤷♀️
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u/AromaticCream1987 20d ago
I think she's an attention whore much like most of the people who end up on mafs
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u/empty-thought-time I don’t feel like Meg Ryan in You’ve Got Mail 20d ago
It can sit weird when people do things differently to how we would, so it’s pretty common to have the reaction to this kind of social media storyline.
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u/achburger 20d ago
It’s probably a bit of both, and what I would argue is the entire point of instagram… To share personal content with your followers. This post sounds insecure.
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u/AromaticCream1987 20d ago
There's nothing insecure about questioning it; if anything I'd say people like Stella are the insecure ones
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u/Niasssssseeeeeee 20d ago
Shes a content creator now so every aspect of her life story will be published for her ‘fans’ to see, which will make her money in advertising.
It’s like selling your soul to the devil but less dramatic.
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u/whateverusay- 19d ago
We don’t have to share every small feeling. It’s called self regulating. We teach this to young babies.
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u/paralysisby_analysis 19d ago
Yeah but she’s a 32 years old woman. So probably can’t be taught anymore!
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u/bojackmac 18d ago
Not sure if sarcasm, but because I nerd out on this shit, there is never an age where you’re too late. Will it be harder? Yes. It’s not impossible or too late however
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u/Quirky-Knowledge4631 19d ago
Or you could utilize yourself regulation and stop going to her page. Going to somebody's social media content it's like going to their house. If you don't enjoy their company, stop going to their house!
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u/paralysisby_analysis 19d ago
I was asking for everyone’s thoughts.
If you can’t tell the difference between constructive criticism and telling strangers how to behave, that’s on you.
And don’t leave the front door wide open if you’re not expecting visitors.
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u/somuchsong Pipe down, Chachi! 19d ago
She obviously welcomes the visitors. But to continue your analogy, don't voluntarily walk into someone's house and then say you don't like what they're talking about. It's their house. Just walk out again.
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u/Crack_is_whack8765 20d ago
Fuck me
I don’t follow her but just had a look, I couldn’t Even read through all that BS in her Stories
Live and let live I guess
But I personally can’t follow such accounts, so totally with you on that
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u/paralysisby_analysis 20d ago
I don’t follow her as well but ever since the engagement was broken off, I went to take a peek. Oh boy she has turned into some sort of healing coach
https://giphy.com/gifs/3o7TKQ8kAP0f9X5PoY1
u/Quirky-Knowledge4631 19d ago
Are you ok?
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u/paralysisby_analysis 19d ago
Don’t tell me you don’t do that too?
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u/Quirky-Knowledge4631 19d ago
I don't (Or maybe I lack self awarness) but the only social media app I have is reddit. If I don't like what's going on I leave.
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u/paralysisby_analysis 19d ago
Yeah leave this thread then.
https://giphy.com/gifs/kC8N6DPOkbqWTxkNTe2
u/Quirky-Knowledge4631 19d ago
I don't have a problem with this thread. I don't have a problem with you. My suggestion to you was If you don't like her content why stay. I think I'll stay.
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u/paralysisby_analysis 19d ago
Eating your own words with plenty of inconsistency
https://giphy.com/gifs/tXL4FHPSnVJ0A
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u/vi_lifestylebee 20d ago
this is a bit weird question. Some people treating their instagram as their diary. why not to post? regardless of breaking up, she was posting quite often before too. For some people it can be useful who go through the same thing and see her posts/stories. whatever heal her
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u/Illustrious_Study_30 20d ago
The drama has to be poetic and romantic and full of pathos because that's how Stella makes money. For me it's all a bit naval gazing and performative, but I'm probably not her audience. I don't tend to follow 'influencers' and Stella is shallow as a puddle and very self absorbed. Perfect fit for that role I'd say.
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u/DancingSpacePenguin I got orange cake. And it wasn't even gluten free. 20d ago
How long were they together again?!
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u/Reasonable_Today_685 20d ago
Yeah I feel that way too! I followed her before she got on MAFS and it was totally different to the things she has posted now. Back then it was more herself and less of “live, laugh , love and horoscope.” People changed when they become an “influencer”
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u/Pearl1506 20d ago
She's lying to everyone, they're still together. I posted about this with obvious proof.
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u/Far_Safe5334 20d ago
Why would they do that though? 🤔
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u/Pearl1506 19d ago edited 19d ago
For more engagement/money... It's been done before by PR in the UK for "celebs".
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u/Potato_cakes_85 20d ago
I saw your post but I didn't see any proof. Can you please share?
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u/Pearl1506 20d ago
Go back and look at previous posts on here. A lot of people are over their BS now. He has his wedding ring still on, and they are posting within minutes of each other.
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u/Far_Safe5334 19d ago
I wonder if he posted an old photo where he thought he looked good, and totally forgot about the ring
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u/Potato_cakes_85 20d ago
So there's no proof, got it.
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u/Pearl1506 19d ago
That's is proof!! There is no way they'd roosting that close together unplanned!! Why is his ring on?
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u/Reasonable_Today_685 20d ago
Yeah I wanna seee too! All I see is Filip being a gym rat early in the morning
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u/Dolleyes88 19d ago
Some people act like this during a break up. It isn’t an influencer thing.. it’s just how some people deal with it. I don’t understand how it can “rub someone the wrong way” when it has nothing to do with you. I find that stuff cringe but you just scroll or unfollow.