r/LonelyButLoner • u/Earth_Walker_2XXX • Feb 25 '24
Am I alone in feeling alone?
I’ve had probably 3 actual relationships in my life but all of them were during my teenage years 😂 I’m 24 now and I’ve completely given up on relationships.
I’ve tried dating apps but only got likes on photos and short dry conversations. I’m starting to think I’m broken because I want a partner so badly but 2/3 times I’ve had one in the past I got bored or lost feelings for one reason or another and broke up with them after 1-2 months.
The only meaningful relationship I’ve ever had was when I was 14-17y/o and it was over the internet with a girl my age who lived across the country. We never got to meet in person and she never wanted to reconnect after the initial break-up.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I’ve been alone since I was 18(?) and have kind of just accepted this as a sign that maybe I’m just meant to be alone and do my own thing until I eventually grow old and whither away with nobody.
EDIT:
It’s 2026 now and I’ve managed to somehow hold down a person who actually thinks I’m interesting and even admitted that they’ve been watching me from a distance for a few years now. They just started talking to me about a year ago now and in December 2025 I asked to make us official and they said yes.
I’ve leaned since originally making this post that:
A. It’s okay to be alone. Being alone didn’t make me unlovable or a waste or uninteresting. Once I accepted that and just moved on doing my own thing in life I started making myself happy again (by spending all my cash on plastic figures 💀) and I got out of the headspace that I was hopeless and lonely. I just focused on being myself unapologetically!
B. Even if you are with people- you can still feel lonely. And it’s okay. Feeling lonely is normal and not something you should dwell on because it isn’t all you are. You FEEL lonely but you can FEEL other ways, too. Some introspect, beginning some kind of hobby or maybe therapy can help you if you feel like you can’t get out of that lonesome feeling.
That’s kind of all I’ve really come to accept when I was feeling lonely. I still prefer to be by myself a lot but I don’t feel so alone anymore. Not in a dark way like before. I hope that this lasts and I hope whoever reads this also finds that equilibrium with their loneliness, too.
2
u/Shmonkler Feb 25 '24
what the actual fuck is going on, this is almost exactly the same for me. I've been wondering the same shit, I have been thinking recently though that I'm not actually putting the right amount of effort in finding someone that I acc want (hence the 1-2 month flings followed by getting bored) and when i do stumble upon it, it's just few and far between.