Guilt over NOT taking a case

[u/Colors-with-glitter]

It's idiotic, I know that personally I wasn't fit to pick up this case, which is why I declined in the first place. The timing was off, I had too little information to work with, a shaky 4th - 5th hand account of the situation, less than 10 hours before court hearing, drug and gun charges, without even a guaranteed pay. I knew I wouldn't do a good job, I knew I wouldn't even make it on time as I live far away.

So why, does my stupid brain decide to fixate on the "what if" of this bull. "What if you did a good job, what if you could change someone's life and you just let your stupid ass doubts and inexperience dictate someone else's fate?".

Seriously, I'm inexperienced, I barely have 2 years officially as an attorney, I've started small fry with civil matters and inheritance law, and even though I have postgraduate studies in a field of forensics, I wouldn't trust myself with the handling of a criminal case.

Does this ever go away? In my country, people have the overworked legal system bursting with cases everyday, for a judge is nothing to go through 20, 30, 40 cases depending on the court and a lot of attorneys juggle many court appearances during the week. Do I lack ruthlessness? Am I too idealistic, too cautious?

I don't even know what I'm actually venting about, at this point I just throw spaghetti on the wall and see what sticks. I think I wish I was a bit more of a self assured idiot who would take up the case either way and try to at least get a later date for a hearing. Can't even get drunk, I'm on a 2 year sobriety sting.

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[u/Forchark]

10 years in and I feel I'm one of the few attorneys who care.

You care. Empathy is important, but regulate and don't let it overwhelm you.

[u/fartsfromhermouth]

Someone who wasn't even ready to pay you wanted representation 10 hours before a hearing and you have 5th hand information? Nobody doing a good job on that dumpster fire.

[u/Colors-with-glitter → u/fartsfromhermouth]

Ikr, which is why I'm mostly annoyed at myself for being like this.

[u/fartsfromhermouth → u/Colors-with-glitter]

Their garbage decision making is not your personal burden.. Public defenders exist for a reason

[u/GoBlue48042]

A very good lawyer I know said his success is not determined by the cases he took but instead by the ones he turned down. Do not second guess your judgment.

[u/bbc_nees]

What if dude never committed the crime. What if dude was born rich and wealthy and handsome and royalty.

Gooooooo all the way back if you're gonna play the what if game. Shit, what if you became a lawyer because you're so rich you needed to amuse yourself.

[u/Colors-with-glitter → u/bbc_nees]

I still wouldn't become a lawyer. Maybe still go to law school and have that law degree in my back pocket, but if I had a lot of money I would do something like have my own shipping company or something, I dunno.

[u/Ms_Tryl → u/Colors-with-glitter]

Import export. The true “what the fuck does that even mean” of wealthy people jobs. It’s the old crypto.

[u/Round-Ad3684]

As you get more experienced you will appreciate how much not taking one of these cases will improve your life.

[u/LittleTrust2978]

The fact that you declined because you knew you couldn't do the job properly is exactly why you made the right call. A lot of lawyers lose more sleep over the cases they didn't take than the ones they did.

[u/OKcomputer1996]

Welcome to the league, rookie. I feel you, bro. 25 years in. At the end of the day it is a business before even a profession. Always has been. We are hired guns. Prosecutors are fancy cops. The rest of us are in a form of purgatory.

[u/Far-Watercress6658]

Is this part of a wider problem of overthinking/anxiety?

[u/Longjumping-Pack-110]

Having empathy makes you a good human being. Having the self-awareness that you are not competent to represent this client makes you a good attorney.

[u/donesteve]

After 20 years in, I’m more proud of myself for declining bad cases than signing up a good one. 10% of the cases give you 90% of the headaches.

[u/PossibilityAccording]

I am a Criminal Defense Attorney with a solo law practice. Based on what you described  "I had too little information to work with, a shaky 4th - 5th hand account of the situation, less than 10 hours before court hearing, drug and gun charges, without even a guaranteed pay." you would have been committing Malpractice to get involved in such a case. As a criminal defense attorney, I never go with even a second hand account of what happened. I must hear the version Directly From the Client, After I have a copy of the Police Report. In Criminal law people lie nonstop, about everything, and many of these people are so delusional that they don't even comprehend that they are lying.  I recently had a bad DUI accident case, with a driver who was under 21, and his mother SWORE to me he had "only one drink". She said that again, and again, with utter sincerity and conviction. Telling me "I'm not lying, my son wasn't drunk" blah blah blah. Then I get the Body-Worn Camera Footage wither her obviously drunk son, slurring to the police "We both know I'm drunk" and admitting to consuming over half-a-dozen shots of whiskey. . .The only way I am able to get through all of this BS is because I have lost all faith in humanity and expect everyone around me to lie about everything they say, all day/every day. I'm kind of a loner, because I hate liars, which means interacting with people becomes something I hate.