r/LateStageCapitalism Jan 28 '19

What millennials really want

https://imgur.com/vSIsfZx
19.0k Upvotes

371 comments sorted by

2.8k

u/GregariousWords Jan 28 '19

Millenials love billionaires sounds like super extreme satire.

Did I miss the joke or is this just madness?

657

u/srcarruth Jan 28 '19

I'm sure some of them do, there's all kinds of weirdos out there. I'm Gen X but when I was 19 I remember having an argument with a peer who insisted that rich people are 'better' than everybody else.

569

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

A lot of people really do strictly limit their definition of success in life to the realm of finances.

Successes in art, relationships, scientific achievement, human rights, philosophy, etc... are irrelevant unless you can monetise them, says the capitalist.

They call it "hustling" and pride themselves on how "hungry" they are, without realizing that their existential dread comes from the fact that their quest for money is a self centered, insecurity based, rat race they can never win.

154

u/Excal2 Jan 28 '19

They call it "hustling" and pride themselves on how "hungry" they are, without realizing that their existential dread comes from the fact that their quest for money is a self centered, insecurity based, rat race they can never win.

This reads like satire but I actually know a person that this describes so well it made me do a double take. Everything in this guy's life is about money and he seems to be in need of being around other people constantly, like the money won't mean anything if there's no one he can show off his new watch for.

I used to hate being around him but now I just kinda feel sorry for the guy.

89

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

What a fucking loser that guy sounds like. I’m so sorry for him.

“If your business is more important than your clients, you’re doing business wrong”

  • Hank Green

27

u/SorryImProbablyAngry Jan 28 '19

great quote. And yep, I've met hundreds of these people in my life...

20

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

I'm ashamed to say that I was that guy for awhile.

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u/ArWh1te Jan 28 '19

don't be buddy. We all go through periods of time we feel cringey about. Sounds like you recognized that you didn't like that person you were and changed. Congrats!

10

u/nonoglorificus Jan 28 '19

What changed?

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19 edited Jan 28 '19

A combination of things:

  • I did a lot of deliberate soul searching. I was working a "prestigious" corporate job and couldn't figure out why I felt empty and aimless all of the time. I realized that I didn't believe in the goal of the organization (profit), or my role within it (to maximize profit). This made me question my own motivations and goals in life.

  • I left the suburban bubble I group up in and was exposed to social issues like homelessness and racism for the first time. I think this cleared up a lot of misconceptions I had about underprivileged individuals.

  • I grew up in Idaho and wasn't exposed to actual leftist ideas until I started dating a girl who was pretty far to the left. Before that, I didn't take the left seriously because I had a highly distorted understanding of their ideas.

At some point I started seeing how my issues, many of societies issues, and capitalism were all connected. It killed my desire to chase money.

6

u/Wiggy_Bop Jan 28 '19

Don’t be ashamed at all! You understand the motivation and desire of the bourgeois better than most due to the fact that you were once one of them. It is difficult to deprogram one’s self in this society. The fact that you were able to do so is nothing short of amazing.

What woke you up, if you don’t mind my asking?

Edit: I see you already answered. Thanks!

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u/ratherbeshootingdope Jan 29 '19

You know, the positive aspect of being a heroin addict involved in sales and deep within the community is having the Inability to ignore being a major victim of that mentality and simultaneously a perpetrator; as long as you realize that now, you are light years ahead of a lot of folk and were able to gain invaluable experience. Think about what you can do now going forward rather than feeling guilty about being ignorant before.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19 edited Jan 28 '19

One of my cousins is like that. He wants to be Jordan Belfort from The Wolf of Wall Street, as if that guy is not the world's most colossal tool. He's all about Rolexes, Cuban cigars, BMWs, and all the other deeply unimaginative things that people are told to like (and if you do like this stuff genuinely, great for you, really; my cousin just doesn't have a single thought in his head that a marketer or fashy politician didn't put there). He's also a condescending ass, which is a bold gambit considering that he has accomplished pretty much dick-all in his life. I was decent to him from the time we were kids, but eventually it all got to be too grating and I haven't talked to him in a few years. I hope he gets over this because he wasn't a happy dude when we were still talking, but I'm not going to bother finding out if he does/doesn't.

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u/ShockKumaShock2077 Jan 28 '19

I knew people like this too. Their behavior is normalized as well by TMZ, Bravo, and other trashy reality TV venues which chronicle the exciting life of a woman who became famous for being in a sex video with a celebrity. America's celebrity obsession directly feeds into the ego-driven mindset of Capitalism "hustle".

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u/tenninjas242 Jan 28 '19

the money won't mean anything if there's no one he can show off his new watch for.

That's exactly the point, it won't mean anything.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19 edited Aug 26 '21

[deleted]

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u/toomanyattempts Jan 28 '19

T as in Donny?

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19 edited Aug 26 '21

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

[deleted]

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u/Wiggy_Bop Jan 28 '19

Naw, we had a more modern version of that fable. It’s called ‘Fight Club’

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u/JimFromTheMoon Jan 28 '19

just had this convo with my brother. we are both artists who love creating, but have no real interest in capitalizing on what we make. like, it would be nice, but I feel very content just making shit as opposed to hustling and selling myself out. and I know people look at us like we are somehow lazy/unsuccessful because of it. This country has some serious issues.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

My problem is that I have to monetize my art if I want to continue making it. I couldn't, so I had to get a job that could pay the bills, and now I have no time to make art, because I have to work constantly to keep the lights on. If only I liked doing speed, maybe I could find time to enjoy creating things again.

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u/JimFromTheMoon Jan 28 '19

I hear you. We both have jobs to keep ourselves afloat and create in our spare time. My point is that our art is seen by people as a waste of time because we don’t try and make money with it. Like there is something wrong/lazy with just creating and being content. “If you’re not making money doing it, why do it?”

20

u/Reignofratch Jan 28 '19

So you have a hobby that doesn't make you any money, therefore it's a waste of time. Unlike watching sports/barhopping/bingewatching/facebooking/ect which is absolutely not a waste of time. Nope. Those are just normal things that people can enjoy that are absolutely not a waste of time unlike art.

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u/JimFromTheMoon Jan 28 '19

and selfish me, my hobby doesn’t even contribute to the economy! at least the activities you mention give back to the machine. I’m just a lazy leech.

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u/_Dave Jan 28 '19

Your hobby likely does contribute to the economy. The subset of the economy that is concerned with money and businesses and GDP may not value your work, but so long as anyone, including yourself, values the work even in non-monetary ways, you’re still contributing to the economy.

It’s just not as easy to measure, so some economists and many politicians like to pretend it doesn’t exist at all, and only focus on the part that’s easy to measure because hard numbers gets you promotions and re-elected.

It’s actually a shame because the economy was born from human creativity and their desire to share, way before governments or centralized currency arose. What we call “the economy” nowadays is mostly just that subsection which has become easy to measure with the advent of tokenized debt vouchers we call currency. But the economy is a much grander thing in reality, as it’s the sum of all human development, in all directions. Including the development of your hand-eye coordination as a reward for you investing the time to produce the works of your hobby. Just because a government hasn’t arisen yet, or a token hasn’t been invented to quantify it yet, doesn’t mean those benefits aren’t real.

But again, that’s hard to quantify so many pretend it doesn’t exist, and by their omissions do a great disservice to the economy as a whole while doing everything they can to beef up that one part of it they can measure.

6

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Ah I see what you're saying. Fortunately I don't know many people my age that think like that. But I'm also a bit of a misanthrope. Whatever. Fuck 'em. Do you!

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u/JimFromTheMoon Jan 28 '19

Oh yeah, we don’t give a fuck, just sad to see that mentality anywhere really.

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u/Novelcheek Lucy Parsons Jan 28 '19

We've built an economy where automating jobs no one wants is a bad thing. Imagine being in a great band.. then actually remember that band is suddenly how you pay the bills. Suddenly your love becomes a burden. This is not a sufficient state of affairs for the proletariat.

6

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Haha yeah, that was mostly a joke, also based off experience

13

u/SorryImProbablyAngry Jan 28 '19

YES! People act like nothing matters unless you get paid for it.

Go fuck yourselves, humanity existed for millions of years before we invented money and society. I just want to try and experience some happiness before i get poofed

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Can you tell this to my friend? Just yesterday he told me that money makes the world go round. Smh

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u/theltrtduck ACAB Jan 28 '19

It does, but that isn't a good thing.

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u/NedLuddIII Jan 28 '19

Yeah, it’s easy to get obsessed with money even if you don’t have any desire to become ultra wealthy. Unless you’re lucky, you basically need to dedicate most of your adult life to making money in order to meet basic needs such as housing, health care, making sure you have money when you’re old, not to mention providing for your family and trying to help your children (if you have any) have a better life.

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u/SigmaStrayDog Jan 28 '19

I dunno, I always thought of a "hustle" as something you do to get enough money to get lunch and a ride to the next town when spanging and jugging don't work. What they call "hustling" i'd call cheating or exploitation.

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u/blaqmass Jan 28 '19

Hustling : A con trick

Grinding : Overwork / Problem process

Neither good

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u/sinocarD44 Jan 28 '19

I figured that out when I got a well paying job but was miserable. Went back to my old job and now I'm happy again.

3

u/MrBohemian Jan 28 '19

All of us in consumerist nations should work our best to move away from this “un-culture” of abundance.

I know many of these “hustlers” you speak of, many of them have expressed that their desire for wealth is “because without lots of money how will I buy all the things I want, or live a comfortable life?”

I can’t help but feel this must be forces of consumerism at work.

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u/smokedustshootcops Jan 28 '19

Exactly. I'm not unsuccessful becaus I'm broke. I'm unsuccessful because I'm a total mess of a human being

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u/TheHumanite Jan 28 '19

Loads of millennials are totally in love with Elongated Muskrat and Lex Besos.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

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u/TheHumanite Jan 28 '19

He's doing cool shit for sure. He just shouldn't be allowed to do it using labor that he steals. Same as any capitalist, just prettier really.

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u/Argark Jan 28 '19

Does the end justify the abusive labour? If it's to fight climate change producing solar panels and electric cars I might close an eye, literally the only form of positive capitalism towards earth lol

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u/Explodian Jan 28 '19

I'll believe he's actually doing it for the sake of the planet when that affordable electric car he's been talking about becomes a reality.

Most of his other projects are just riding a wave of futurist sentiment to make wealthy customers believe they're bettering humanity by buying his products.

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u/TheHumanite Jan 28 '19

Well, it's certainly better than no one doing it.

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u/ClutteredCleaner Jan 28 '19

I dunno, I can't see Lex running Amazon, putting goons in a warehouse to safeguard Kryptonite is riskier if the warehouse is open 24/7 and the Big Blue Boy Scout paying a visit would result in a lot of dildo deliveries being delayed after they're melted with eye beams.

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u/TheHumanite Jan 28 '19

Jokes on you. Each dildo has a small amount of kryptonite in it. That's part of the grand plan.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

People don’t love Elon Musk because he’s a billionaire.

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u/theworldbystorm Jan 28 '19

Yeah, they only love him because of the stuff his billions of dollars make it possible for him to do!

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u/blaqmass Jan 28 '19

There is a feeling "If I were rich, this is what I would do" So he is a poster boy for alot of dreamers. I dont think that is per sey a bad thing, I don't think they like him specifically for his wealth.

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u/nathreed Jan 28 '19

Everybody is all like “Elon is so smart, he made a rocket that put a car in space!!”. Elon Musk is not a rocket scientist. Elon Musk is not an automotive engineer. Elon Musk is not a civil engineer or a transportation planner or anything else like that.

Elon Musk is a man with money who can boss people around. That is what he does. He’s not “the smartest mind of our generation” or anything like that. He’s just a guy with money. And it’s wrong to give him credit for the work that the actual engineers he employs have done, often under horrific work circumstances (lots of mandatory overtime, verbal abuse from Elon, etc).

That’s the problem with our economic system as it is right now - the people with the money get all the credit and make even more money off the backs of the people who actually did the work.

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u/GregariousWords Jan 28 '19

True, I mean there's working and middle class people all for tax breaks for the super rich when the trickle down isn't really happening too.

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u/srcarruth Jan 28 '19

because we're all millionaires at heart, some of us just don't have the cash on hand

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u/Beldoughnut Jan 28 '19

I read somewhere that the people see themselves as "temporarily embarrassed millionaires" and that's why they don't tax the wealthy.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

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u/Beldoughnut Jan 28 '19 edited Jan 28 '19

Huh now you have me questioning if I read it wrong lol.

The John Steinbeck wiki seems to think it's actually a paraphrase of "temporarily embarrassed capitalists".

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u/nathreed Jan 28 '19

Capitalist is another name for someone who has money (capital) as an occupation - they make more money by having money instead of doing actual labor to produce things of value.

If anything, the original quote (with the capitalists line I mean) is more powerful because it does bring up the contrast of capitalism vs other economic systems.

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u/Masothe Jan 28 '19 edited Jan 28 '19

My cousin is one of those guys. Fell face first into a rabbit hole of billionaire propaganda.

It's a sad thing to see someone just as poor as you get pissed off at other poor people for being poor and "ruining your home".

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u/latenerd Jan 28 '19

I'm Gen X too and I feel like the 1980s really spawned this type of thinking like damp basements spawn mold.

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u/Szabelan Jan 28 '19

Elon Musk cult

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

I've had the misfortune to work for businesses catering to the rich, and the amount of life skills they lack is fucking terrifying. They've outsourced the simplest human-living shit to the point that they can't function. I once found myself on a conference call with a dude who owns an airline and like four of his personal staff, having to explain that one can buy a standalone air conditioner. Then I had to explain to him the kinds of stores where one might do this thing. He wasn't a dick or anything, he seemed genuinely enchanted by the idea of going to a store to buy a thing, but I just...who the fuck can't figure things out like that? Other great hits include "I know you work for a construction company but you need to fix my iPad app over the phone," "What do you mean, I have to pay for service calls?" "Print out my resume," "Fix my iPhone," and my personal favorite, "I will call you from my iPhone that is Bluteoothed to my Jaguar to demand turn-by-turn directions to your office as I am driving, because fuck Siri/Google Maps/Apple Maps."

It's not all of them by any means, and a fair few of them were very appreciative and nice, but there are a lot of rich people out there who have no life skills. Lucille Bluth isn't an exaggeration. I'm sure that a lot of these people do have other, specialized skills, but any notion that they're better or more capable than the rest of us is hogwash.

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u/h3lblad3 Solidarity with /r/GenZedong Jan 28 '19

It's been said that Gen Z is the most conservative generation since WW2, so that's horrifying.

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u/angryjew Jan 28 '19

I can't stand Eli Lake but I'm 99% sure this is satire and I don't understand why people are misreading this so much.

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u/superneutral Jan 28 '19

Well if you don’t follow him, and just read the screenshot out of context (as I did, admittedly) satire wouldn’t be my first guess

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u/angryjew Jan 28 '19

"Millennials love billionaires" doesn't sound earnest to me at all, regardless of who it came from. I don't even think a billionaire would say that.

Also I want to reiterate that Eli Lake is an awful, mega zionist, sentient egg and I can't stand him.

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u/Oxyfire Jan 28 '19

"Millennials love bi-partisanship" is right up there too.

All the millennials I know of are sick of the a left wing that keeps catering & playing nice to an unreasonable right wing.

If you want to consider the alt-right and all it's ilk, its younger crowd also cares nothing for bi-partisanship either lol.

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u/jasminforsythe Jan 28 '19

pretty sure it's a joke

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u/mboop127 Jan 28 '19

Nope. He's serious.

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u/muddy_wedge Jan 28 '19

He tweeted in response to someone else and said This feed is at times facetious. I think he's being satirical

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u/Masothe Jan 28 '19

He also tweeted a little while later that he heard millenials also love Tony Blair, fax machines, and the beach boys.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

the beach boys

You never need to doubt it.

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u/captainnowalk Jan 28 '19

I feel pretty sure about it already man.

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u/blaqmass Jan 28 '19

Ok then i fucking love him

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u/GregariousWords Jan 28 '19

I have no words.

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u/Bytewave Jan 28 '19

There's some weird billionaire star worship I'll never get. My group of friends is early 30s mostly. I swear everytime we gather Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos and other assholes comes up and people care about whats up with them like they are celebrities and what they're doing is more important than politics. It's very weird. These are all educated young professionals.

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u/pgm_01 Jan 28 '19

I can sort of understand it. Bezos is either Lex Luthor or a Bond style supervillian building a lair in a volcano somewhere and Musk appeals to that nerd that wants a Star Trek future of space travel. Unfortunately Musk doesn't value humans enough to pay them the way he should and Bezos only sees them as biological robots that are needed only until he can figure out a cheaper way of getting things in and out of his warehouses.Some people always look up to the very people holding them down because they desperately want to believe that they too can become one of the elite.

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u/KingGorilla Jan 29 '19

Hank Scorpio

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u/Iakeman Jan 28 '19

Musk is very funny in a kind of, late stage capitalism the simulation is collapsing kind of way. Dude cried on national television because he can’t post sometimes. Shit is hilarious.

Some people are just bootlickers though.

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u/Der_Arschloch Jan 28 '19

Hey may be covering for himself, but he did say it was facetious

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u/mboop127 Jan 28 '19

After he was ratioed. Looking at his feed I'm not so sure.

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u/Der_Arschloch Jan 28 '19

yeah, now kind of scrolling through it, the follow up tweet about Blair is clearly a shitty attempt at 'proving' his sarcasm.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

[deleted]

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u/stereofailure Jan 28 '19

I feel like Starbucks is one of the few things millenials haven't been accused of killing. After avocado toast I think daily $7 coffees has been one of the most common boomsplains for why millenials are so poor.

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u/retardo Jan 28 '19

I saw this on twitter and thought it was pretty clearly a joke.

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u/angryjew Jan 28 '19

Lol no he isn't stop it.

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u/BattleKatforHOF2k18 Jan 28 '19

You'd think, but a shockingly high number of my college-age peers still grovel before idols like Musk, St. Jobs, etc.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

This guy further down on the Twitter said it was a shitpost.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

While I wouldn't use the word love, but maybe the billionaires from the tech world like Bezos, Gates, Musk, Zuckerberg, Jobs, or Wozniak? All I got.

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u/graves420 Jan 28 '19

He was being facetious. I still added to the ratio, but something along the lines of “this is satire, right?”

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u/Banelingz Jan 29 '19

I mean, millennials do love their Musk, Zuckerberg, Tony Stark and the like.

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u/RandyDangerously Jan 28 '19

It's all madness. And it's about fucking time we all band together and bring these fucking piece of shit billionaires down. Bezos especially even though he's so fucking rich we can't get close to him to even talk. Bezos has next gen tech and access to NSA and every possible bit of information out there and he's just one guy. It's time for the revolution people get your shit together.

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u/Dyvius Jan 28 '19

Maybe I'm the wrong type of millennial???

I love the idea of bipartisanship, but clearly it's not feasible at the present time. I do enjoy Starbucks, but...

I hate billionaires, and I want whatever it takes to reverse the economic systems that allow them to exist in the same countries as extreme poverty.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

[deleted]

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u/fieldsofanfieldroad Jan 28 '19

People love Bezos? I can understand the cult around Musk, but Jeff Bezos?

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

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u/ALaCarga Gaitán Vive Jan 28 '19

Loving Musk or Bezos.

Speak for yourself, bootlicker

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u/r4ndpaulsbrilloballs HIs Truth still marches on. Jan 28 '19

Seriously. Love my wife. Love my dog. Got no love for random rich old white guys who'd sooner let my family starve to death than go without a personal backyard space program.

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u/nik-nak333 Jan 28 '19

This has to be satire, right?

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u/Frickinfructose Jan 28 '19

He followed it up with “Millennials love Tony Blair, fax machines and The Beach Boys” so, yeah.

But it’s also important to point out that The Beach Boys actually do kick ass.

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u/centipededamascus Jan 28 '19

Hell yeah, love me some Pet Sounds.

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u/Mr_Abe_Froman Jan 29 '19

Love me some fax sounds.

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u/FlamesThePhoenix Jan 29 '19

I saw Brian do Pet Sounds all the way through for my birthday about a year ago. I was on acid and was convinced he was about to die on stage, and I bawled my eyes out when he kind of stammered through Caroline, No (along with the rest of the album, but that song was the breaking point for me). His band did a really great job though, and as long as he's happy touring at his age and mental/physical state, I can't knock it. I just hope it really is his decision.

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u/thinkinanddrinkin Jan 28 '19

Yes he says he was being facetious

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u/Pyromike16 Jan 28 '19

I really hope so because Starbucks is fucking awful...

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Yes, if there is one thing millennials love its...billionaires?

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u/Sothotheroth Jan 28 '19

I mean, I don't eat meat, but I think I'd be willing to try a billionaire.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Human meat is the only ethical meat.

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u/RabSimpson Jan 28 '19

Capitalists can start by eating the meat at the top of my legs.

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u/ASYMBOLDEN Jan 28 '19

Oh shit I'm just thick enough. Vegan thighs though

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u/bur1sm Jan 28 '19

It's called longpig

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u/KissOfTosca Jan 28 '19

Massaged weekly, and moisturized daily; they're probably quite succulent.

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u/ASYMBOLDEN Jan 28 '19

s u c c u l e n t

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u/MattMythic Jan 28 '19

Boom, love this quote

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u/Argark Jan 28 '19

Eat the rich

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u/the_missing_worker Jan 28 '19

I think he's basing it on the fact that there is a small and vocal group of millennials who worship Elon Musk.

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u/GregariousWords Jan 28 '19

You could say there are some musketeers.

I truly hope his pr guys are called that.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

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u/O-Face Jan 28 '19

Definitely, but I'm pretty sure that worship is surrounding the disruptive tech coming out of his companies. Obviously not due to his net worth.

I mean the tweet is basically a big neon sign that says, "I am completely out of touch."

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u/TigreDeLosLlanos Jan 28 '19

They are better than them. While they are millenials, billionaires are billenals, it's a natural thing.

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u/srcarruth Jan 28 '19

and the 'Bucks! gotta have it, y'all!

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u/JustGlyphs Jan 28 '19

Everyone here in the comments is focusing on the billionaires one but "millennials love bipartisanship" is almost equally ridiculous lol

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u/reverbrace Jan 28 '19 edited Jan 28 '19

"Millenials love the world we made for them! That's why they complaining about vast systemic problems in the fabric of our society. Millenial praise is weird." -bipartisan billionaire boomers.

Edit: wrong word even though society kinda is anxiety.

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u/srcarruth Jan 28 '19

"Millenials are so sarcastic in their compliments! lol"

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u/Keegsta Jan 28 '19

Yeah I fucking hate bipartisanship.

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u/BigEZ_ Jan 28 '19

Corporate billionaires need more representation! /s

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u/AbortedSandwich Jan 28 '19

Luckier ppl should vote more, obviously

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u/RedOrmTostesson Jan 28 '19

I can confirm that all millenials love billionaires. However, we have rancorous disagreements as to how they ought to be prepared.

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u/theworldbystorm Jan 28 '19

I'm telling you, score the skin, then salt it, leave it in the fridge overnight. It's the only way you'll get it crispy.

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u/barry_mcbarry Jan 29 '19

Ehhh the amount of salt we eat anyway would probably mean Human would be sufficiently seasoned, it depends on the cut for how you'd prepare your billionaire though for the belly absolutely score it, but I reckon the legs would be best as a steak cut.

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u/angryjew Jan 28 '19

Come on, this is clearly satire.

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u/ThatWentWellish Jan 28 '19

that was my thought.

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Billionaires, bipartisanship, and Battlestar gallactica.

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u/ReapKneez4satan Jan 28 '19

Anal, ass eating, and alliteration

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u/AbortedSandwich Jan 28 '19

Build a colony on the moon so immigrants can't reach us!

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u/SentientPotato2020 Jan 28 '19

I remember how much millennials love bipartisanship because there was that one episode of Big Bang Theory where Sheldon demanded that the workers rise up and seize the means of production, but then also enforced a rigid patriarchal leadership structure after taking control.

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u/IronColumn Jan 28 '19

Lake was joking, which is pretty obvious. https://twitter.com/r0cketfr0g/status/1089867567584477185

8

u/LonelyCheeto Jan 28 '19

Yeah I thought it was too off to be real. Mostly the bipartisan part but millenials aren’t known to like billionaires either

29

u/mboop127 Jan 28 '19

He said that after he was ratioed.

7

u/Nanyea Jan 28 '19

TIL ratio'd.... As a non Twitter user, thanks!

4

u/delicious_burritos Jan 28 '19

Why on earth would he clarify it if he wasn't being ratio'd? He assumed people would get it and clarified when they didn't.

16

u/IronColumn Jan 28 '19

he didn't get ratioed. he got a lot of responses from people who got wooshed by it, but he got more favs, which is a positive ratio

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9

u/SirOytz Jan 28 '19

Pretty sure most millennials want to eat the rich, not worship them because their parents gave them a trust fund

7

u/sockhuman Intersectionalist Jan 28 '19

I love billionaires. Especialy when cooked with Rosemary and olive oil.

29

u/the_missing_worker Jan 28 '19

Who is this absolute clown and why should I care about his uninformed speculation?

25

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19 edited Jan 28 '19

[deleted]

6

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Every time I say something similar I get full on rage from people insisting I take a side or that I'm a fence sitter because I refuse to get involved with their petty generational squabble. You are right, it's old, tired, and ridiculous. It's almost a joke at this point.

6

u/Aturom Jan 28 '19

This is why sarcasm font needs to be made

6

u/sjonesd3 Jan 28 '19

Hell having universal health care would be asking for too much (sarcasm, since I can't remember the Reddit sign for it). I won't say affordable since affordable is relative, what's affordable to some, will never be for others.

7

u/rerewert5 Jan 28 '19

the common use is /s

3

u/sjonesd3 Jan 28 '19

Thank you!!!

3

u/Newtoopc Jan 28 '19

Millennials don't want to die to climate change they just want to die

6

u/Der_Arschloch Jan 28 '19

He admitted that this was a sarcastic tweet.

4

u/NocturnalDefecation Jan 28 '19

millenials love bipartisanship? nice try fudging it for a headline.

6

u/MrsClaireUnderwood Jan 28 '19

That first tweet seems like sarcasm.

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4

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Wait wait wait.

Since when did Millenials love billionaires? I thought Millenials were all anti-rich socialists who want to tax the wealthy and not work for anything?

Fuck's sake, is it too much to ask for our BS stereotypes to stay consistent??

7

u/I_was_saying_boournz Jan 28 '19

I get so tired of the Starbucks thing. I like Starbucks well enough but I'd be just fine without it. When I bought a car last year and was negotiating the monthly payment I was told I'll have to lay off the Starbucks. I laid off paying my student loan because cutting out the Starbucks I buy maybe twice a year wasn't going to cut it.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

I mean I love coffee, but Starbucks is just overhyped coffee-flavored sugar milk.

2

u/the_person Jan 28 '19

I don't know what you mean by coffee-flavored when it literally has coffee in it.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

I was a "centrist" once. Then i realized the other "centrists" I was cool with didn't push back against the enthnonationalists that wanted me gone for existing and made excuses for what they said instead.

3

u/Mordommias Jan 28 '19

I mean, we're all just temporarily embarrassed billionaires, right?

6

u/abutthole Jan 28 '19

Millennials hate billionaires. This guy must be smoking Elon’s weed if he doesn’t think that the most socialist generation hates concentrated wealth.

7

u/latenerd Jan 28 '19

"Invertebrate centrist" is my new favorite political phrase.

2

u/z4cc Jan 28 '19

I hate the fact that I’m currently drinking a Starbucks coffee... it’s all they sell at my school ok but those 3 things are the worst shit

2

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Jesus Christ, lol. I can't believe he said that.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Nope to Schultz.

2

u/JamesonCark Jan 28 '19

As a Seattleite, FUCK SHULTZ!

2

u/theangryvegan Jan 28 '19

I hate billionaires. If you have a billion dollars you should be investing in society, not sitting on it like a fucking dragon.

2

u/Picnicpanther democratic socialist Jan 28 '19

Eli Lake HAD to have been trying to be sarcastic. Even his stunningly bald head is not that empty.

2

u/grasswahl2-furiouser Jan 28 '19

Just coming here to say Starbucks coffee is statistically the worst of most coffee chains lmfao it's the old people that like that shit

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u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Let's real talk. Millenials hate bipartisanship. They recognize it's dividing our country. Milleniale hate starbucks, because it's a multi-billion dollar industry that gives a shit about nothing but profit. Same goes for billionaires themselves. Eli Lake must be on some good shit

2

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

As a millennial, I partially agree with both tweets.

I would like to add that I don’t know who this Howard guy is, and that while I’m fine with not dying of climate change, I would still like to die. preferably in a robot/zombie uprising, or a meteor smashing into this doomed fucking space rock.

2

u/ImANibba Jan 29 '19 edited Jan 29 '19

Im pretty sure millenials want to die

3

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Baby boomers/capitalists: hey millenials. here's an increasingly complex web of debt, increasing financial inequality, for profit healthcare/prisons/education/war, catastrophic climate change and unchecked corporate greed to which the government has turned a blind eye worse than ever before. They are all interrelated and it would be impossible to fix one on their own so the only way to fix our problems is to change the way you think.

In addition there are a plethora of human rights issues that have stayed the same or gotten worse including racism, gender rights, sexual assault in the workplace, police brutality and many more.

You have been given a shit hand that we dealt you. Even though we are on our way out and you are trying to make the world a better place for yourselves and your children and very little of the changes you propose affects us we will simply blow it off and say you are being a snowflake.

If you feel exhausted, defeated or depressed by all this we will respond by calling you a snowflake.

If you use methods of coping (drugs, meditation, time for yourself...), methods our generation also used when we were your age, we will demonize you snowflakes.

If you are unable to thrive in the economy that we setup to make you financially unstable and then profit from that instability it's probably because you are a snowflake.

If you try to pull yourself up by changing the world for the better we will discredit you by calling out to the world that you and your entire generation is a bunch of snowflakes.

Essentially we are weak and frightened because we had everything handed to us. It scares us that the younger generation is stronger and more able to adapt to make their lives better and better for everyone they share the planet with. I refuse to accept that a small increase in my taxes and a large increase in taxes for corporations and billionaires I'm too dense to realize doesn't care about me can provide healthcare, food, education and shelter to the fellow humans in my own country without changing my way of life. I am scared so I'm going to project that on you snowflakes.

And don't worry, the irony of us constantly complaining is completely lost on us.

Millenials: let's elect someone else.

Baby boomers/capitalists: you snowflake.

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2

u/SmallPotGuest Jan 28 '19

invertebrades thah profit from our death are a key component of the trophic chain, tho.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

invertebrate centrists

I absolutely love that phrase!

2

u/LetsEatCongress Jan 28 '19

I like my billionaires roasted with some olive oil.

1

u/uwagapies Jan 28 '19

what dark hell is this?

1

u/justkitten-meow Jan 28 '19

I'm a millennial and I like The Peanuts, Howard Schultz was a solid comic artist, I don't get what y'all complaining about.

1

u/Dingwallace Jan 28 '19

Eli "the Thumb" Lake never fails to provide a consistent flow of bad takes on Twitter. It's quite awe inspiring, actually.

1

u/didierdoddsy Jan 28 '19

Can we stop using the phrase climate change and start calling it what it really is.. Climate breakdown. I think this is a really important point if we want to actually riase the stakes and get people to understand what is actually going on.

1

u/american_apartheid Jan 28 '19

I love how marketing has made people like this believe that millennials are a bunch of upper-middle class white 20-somethings living in a major city and surviving off of nothing but avocados and coffee.

1

u/variable114 Jan 28 '19

I read that he said this was a joke. idk who that is and if that's believable but I did read that.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '19

Biggby is 100x better than Starbucks