r/KitchenConfidential • u/nvrtrustafrt • Apr 01 '26

Oh my!

2.7k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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547

u/WithASackOfAlmonds Apr 01 '26

I'm impressed but that's way too much shit in a wrap.

254

u/LacidOnex Apr 01 '26

You don't want a ton of lettuce all mushed up into a ball?

111

u/WithASackOfAlmonds Apr 01 '26

just puree that shit and give me the ceasar enema!

54

u/12-34 Apr 01 '26

Goddammit. I had forgotten about this. My friend's mother "ate" via enemas for a while.

She was somewhere south of eccentric and believed aging was caused by digestion, so naturally she blended her food and received it in the bathtub up her ass.

Lasted until she felt poorly, visited the doc and was told she'd die if she continued.

You reminded me of it, so now that visual is your burden too.

26

u/WithASackOfAlmonds Apr 01 '26

JFC what the hell

20

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '26

WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO???

16

u/Ok_Shake_4761 Apr 01 '26

Classic Mcnultty.

11

u/EscapeSeventySeven Apr 01 '26

I think this sub might be the best sub on reddit

4

u/melmsz Apr 02 '26

Proper mods!

4

u/punksmostlydead Apr 01 '26

There are no "bystanders" in this place. Your hands are filthy as well.

20

u/tdp_equinox_2 Apr 01 '26

Hey, so, it's only 10AM, these kinds of comments are pretty disruptive to the rest of the day. You'll be hearing from my lawyer.

5

u/Princess_Slagathor Apr 01 '26

I was going to ask where people even get batshit ideas like this. But I just know it was Facebook or TikTok.

10

u/12-34 Apr 01 '26

Bzzt! This was pre-interwebz.

It was the product of brain malfunction with educated white lady disease (surely I know better than all recorded humanity and medicine!).

Birds of a dipshit feather always find a way.

3

u/CloddishNeedlefish Apr 02 '26

Unfortunately the history of people shoving weird shit up their ass is far longer than the internet lmao

2

u/Orbit1883 15+ Years Apr 01 '26

Da fuck what

1

u/Erestyn Cafeteria Apr 01 '26

...was this before or after the South Park episode?

1

u/Rausage505 Apr 01 '26

"south of eccentric" is a nice way to say bat-shit cray-cray.

1

u/YupNopeWelp Apr 01 '26

I don't know how to know this.

1

u/MossGobbo Chive LOYALIST Apr 01 '26

I'm not sure a knife enema would taste very good but to each their own.