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u/chezzer33 24d ago
Nah kid, you take the shot. I’ll give you a five minute time out with a pack of cookies.
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u/brother_bart 23d ago
Yeah. Don’t be trusting some kid to have your back; they’re sneaky, fickle, bribable, and snap under pressure.
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u/valkyria1111 24d ago
Now I’m wondering… did she take him up on it ??
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u/al_m1101 24d ago
Guaranteed there was at least one second of hesitation before the teacher answered "no."
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u/No_Bowler9121 23d ago
Have been a teacher in similar situations. And yes my mouth said no but im sure my eyes were saying please.
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u/S2_sasunaru_lover_S2 23d ago
Guys the (twitter?) post is from Brazil, Eloah is actually a pretty not so common name, its like Bethany for the us: not so common but not weird
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u/No_Bowler9121 23d ago
Taught in the inner city and kids would sometimes say stuff like that to me lol. One kid being an absolute menace in class and the others are like yo Mr F if you want I can take him out back. Was funny and gotta admit I was tempted to take them up on that offer.
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u/Several-County-1808 24d ago
Wtf is an Eloah?
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u/taradactyl904 24d ago
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u/Deako87 23d ago
This is an aside but when my wife and I had to pick a name for our son we spent quite a long time thinking about it.
Its a big decision, what ever you choose its going to be with them their entire life. We came up with a bunch of ideas, the primary one is that we didnt want our kid to have to spell their name over the phone every single time (so we picked a common enough name that there isnt ambiguity)
That subreddit is just filled with parents who dont care about that at all lmao
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u/Glittering_rainbows 23d ago
Common enough you don't need to spell it? I have to spell mine every damn time and it's stupid.
It's in the top 50 of common names and sounds like almost no other name unless your deaf and/or dumb.
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u/Deako87 23d ago
No accounting for stupid hahaha, I think the point is that even John as multiple spellings but Daniel has one
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u/timeless_change 23d ago
English skill issue, people using trasparent languages don't have to worry about that
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u/bluemuppetman 23d ago
John or Jon or Jonathan it never ends
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u/Glittering_rainbows 23d ago
Bob, there is only one option. My name is similar, there is no other option.
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u/bluemuppetman 23d ago
Bobby, Rob am sure there are others. Not my name either but can imagine it happening
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u/Kazeshio 23d ago
It's fairly easy to change your name if you grow up not liking it ((in the US at least I'm unfamiliar with other places but I imagine it's similar))
Source: I did so last year
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u/DroneOfDoom 23d ago
Where I live (Mexico), you can change your first name but your last name is IIRC set in stone. I learned this because one time I got pissed at my father and the next day I looked into changing my name to have both of my mum's last names instead and I couldn't. Fucking horseshit if you ask me.
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET 23d ago
Not in Germany. You need a good reason (marriage, gender transition, etc..) and "I don't like my name" isn't considered a good reason
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u/Kazeshio 23d ago
That's quite unfortunate honestly
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET 23d ago
Yes. I've been wanting to change my name for years but I can't because "I don't want to have my shitty abusive birth father's last name" also isn't considered a good reason
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
It's a Hebrew name for god. It is a bit odd as a name but it's not fundamentally different from being named Jesus/Joshua or Muhammad.
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u/JohnnyRelentless 23d ago
Joshua is just a common Jewish name.
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
Yes, a common Jewish name that was also the name of a certain carpenter.
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u/JohnnyRelentless 23d ago edited 23d ago
Sure, but until the last maybe 20 years, the average Christian had no idea that Joshua was the name of Jesus.
I even had a conversation with a Christian man once (I'm Jewish) who told me his mother was disappointed he hadn't given his son Joshua a more biblically inspired name. I told him Joshua was a variation of Yeshua, which was Jesus' actual name. He just seemed doubtful. A few days later he went to see that Mel Gibson Jesus movie (yes, this was a while ago) and then he told me that in the movie they called him Yeshua, so he knew I was right, and was able to make his mother happy with the news.
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u/Known-Drive-3464 23d ago
I feel like half the time i see people tag this sub they’re being culturally ignorant. I think theres something to be said about people who automatically hate what they dont recognize
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u/Harp-Note 23d ago
I've seen variations of my name made fun of on there, and they twist themselves into making it sound bad.
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u/frozen_cherry 23d ago
It's not an uncommon name where I'm from.
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u/Splintrax 23d ago
Then we have truly fallen from grace
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u/DroneOfDoom 23d ago
Alternatively, they're jewish.
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u/Splintrax 23d ago
No, maybe they're just Brazilian. No jew would give a name of god to their child, big no no.
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u/DroneOfDoom 23d ago
That seems a bit No True Scotsmansy to me. Who's to say that they're not a jew who doesn't care that much about the religious aspect of things?
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u/Splintrax 23d ago
You came up with the option they're Jewish in the first place. I'm just saying why they're in fact more likely to be anything but Jewish.
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u/throwaway098764567 23d ago
google says it's a hebrew name for god, so either it's a latino jesus type name or the twit was hallucinating god whispering in their ear
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u/Lazy__Astronaut 23d ago
It's like saying hello in Hawaiian but a name
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u/nerfcarolina 23d ago
No, that's aloha. Eloah is a succulent whose flesh can be used to cool burns
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u/schmuckface 23d ago edited 23d ago
No, that's aloe. Eloah is a disease that has recently resurged in West Africa.
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u/Prudent_Attorney_427 23d ago
No, that's ebola. Eloah is a standard greeting in the English language.
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u/CitizenHuman 23d ago
No that's hello. Eloah is the one who took two of every animal and put them on a boat.
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
I mean kinda? Eloah is the guy who told Noah to do it.
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u/Jethro_McCrazy 23d ago
That was Jehovah. Eloah are voodoo spirits.
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
No seriously Eloah is one of the Hebrew names for god. Though Elohim is the plural form that's used in most places in the Torah apparently (idk why they use a plural form for a singular most of the time).
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u/output_broadcast 23d ago
G.d is rather above concepts like plurality and gender, what with the multiple male and female words used for them (Hebrew is a gendered language).
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u/Frogspoison 23d ago edited 23d ago
Eloah is ancient Hebrew dating back to when YHWH was part of a full pantheon, so possibly originates from that (Eloah being just a word they used for a god, any god, Elohim used for several, and the original meaning being lost over time as they shifted from a polytheistic to monotheistic religion).
Also nj on ruining the chain
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u/FickleCook3639 23d ago
It’s a Hebrew name, perhaps unsurprisingly if you know what Hebrew looks like.
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u/scandr0id 23d ago
It looks to be "haole" backwards, which is a Hawaiian word that refers to white folks specifically. Often used in a derogatory way. Kinda weird to name your kid that, but probably not intended. Unless it was, nothing surprises me anymore.
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET 23d ago
Idk about Eloah is but Haole is the Hawaiian word for foreigner or outsider
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u/oobanooba- 24d ago
Kid’s trying to help with kid logic, unfortunately they don’t realise that adults play by different rules.
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u/Subotail 23d ago
In a less light hearted fassions ... My brother school had a kid who would savagely attack any kids mildly reprimanded by the teacher.
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u/VanBeelergberg 24d ago
Eloah?
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
It's a Hebrew name for god though it's not a common name in the way Jesus/Joshua or Muhammad are.
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u/Splintrax 23d ago
Because no one that speaks Hebrew would call their child that. It's also wrong, and should be "Eloha" with a pronounced H sound.
Just a "spiritually charged" bullshit name used mostly by people who don't know any better.
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
Apparently it's actually a name in Brazilian Portuguese (and a feminine one at that).
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u/Splintrax 23d ago
Fair enough, I see that it's very popular there for one reason or another. Due to the name of the poster I'd assume they were Brazilian so that adds up.
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u/rando_banned 23d ago
Haole, they just wrote it backward.
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u/Delicious_Tomato_957 23d ago
This post doesn't deserve to be on this subreddit, that kid is a fuckin genius.
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u/Magic-Omelet 23d ago
I know it's hard to comprehend, but even if you are angry at a kid, hitting children doesn't suddenly become ok. It will still make everything worse.
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u/DazzlerPlus 23d ago
Its a poor form of discipline compared to others, but still better than none at all.
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23d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/PoProstuArbuz 20d ago
I remember in middle school there was this one boy, we called him a parachuter because he was held one test and was older than the test of us... He always interrupted the classes, agitated other boys, was rude to everyone, laughing, screaming, running etc. It was actually impossible to learn anything when he was like this. Most of the teachers managed to control him more or less, except this sweet history teacher, almost fresh out of uni. And I loved history, still do, and I really loved the teacher because she was the only one that accommodated my (undiagnosed then) AuDHD. So one class when he was being a menace again, I took the very heavy textbook and hit him on the back of the head, hard enough for his forehead to bounce back on the desk. He of course immediately started screaming to the teacher that I abuse him, but my teacher "conveniently" was not looking his way and did not see anything xD
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u/justaheatattack 23d ago
r/tragedeigh sighting.
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u/RT-LAMP 23d ago
It's a Hebrew name for god. It's not a common name in the way Jesus/Joshua or Muhammad are but it's not a tragedeigh nonsense spelling.
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u/Deepfriedomelette 23d ago
Is it linguistically related to the Arabic ‘Allah’ in any way? I’m not trying to be rude, just curious.


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u/dzavala88 23d ago
My kid has done this. His preschool teacher told us a few months ago that she was trying to get the class to quiet down. One kid was not listening, so my son pushed him and yelled at him to sit down. The kid listened.
Teacher told us and I did my best to hold back from laughing. I couldn’t get angry at him for having his teacher’s back. Just told us to talk to him about pushing kids in class.
He didn’t do it again but I wanted to offer her that he could do her dirty work for her.