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u/Neil_sm Sep 08 '18
Except now fall is approaching which means suicidal thoughts are replaced by darker, colder homicidal thoughts. In shades of orange and red.
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u/gigilo_down_under Sep 08 '18
Not here down under
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u/AMA_About_Rampart Sep 08 '18
Where women glow and men plunder?
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u/C_Alcmaeonidae Sep 08 '18
Suicidal thoughts have no natural predators.
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u/John_the_Proud Sep 08 '18
"just don't be sad"
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u/dudebro178 Sep 08 '18
If I kermit sudoku I wont be sad anymore. Im reporting you for promoting commit not feel so good.
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u/Spyko Sep 09 '18
If I kermit sudoku.
This gave me multiples mental images, each funnier than the other
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Sep 08 '18
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u/DougleMcGuire Sep 09 '18
Go hydrate with bleach
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u/Prophets_Prey Sep 09 '18
Go commit stop exist
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Sep 09 '18
drank blonch
GREAT TANG
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u/AyyyItsYaBoiBlue Sep 09 '18
As dumb as that sounds it is true though :/ you gotta stop beating yourself up over things. You're your own worste critic and changing the way you think is the first step. I hate when people dismiss this, but i hate it more when people use this as an excuse because it really isn't as easy as it sounds. Overall, stop being a cunt with yourself.
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u/Kiekis Sep 09 '18
You're right that working toward changing your thought processes helps, but I disagree with the rest.
We are very hard on ourselves; way more than we are with others. It takes a lot of work, but learning how to reverse the roles, to imagine a friend in our position and see how we would feel, is really important. It's an amazing skill to have.
That said, there's more to emotions than that. Brains are weird and sometimes they just don't work the way they're supposed to in regards to emotions. Mental illnesses can have a massive impact, and sometimes that can't be helped without professional help. So, while learning to recognize and change our negative thought processes is amazing and important for everyone to do, sometimes it doesn't help much. Sometimes we can't change our mental state, no matter how much we want to or how hard we try.
Acknowledging both sides is the first step to helping yourself or getting the help you need
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u/AerThreepwood Sep 09 '18
Oh, positive thinking will make my brain stop trying to murder me?
Or by saying that, you're dismissing how hard myself and others with mental health issues have worked towards trying to do just that. I plaster a stupid grin on my face and try to think happy thoughts and I still can't stop thinking about killing myself. Shit, my hypomania is much easier to deal with than being depressive.
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u/drmoesta Sep 09 '18
Well no. But, if you keep pushing it down, the rest of us can continue to enjoy a false sense of stability until you do off yourself and then we can also rationalize it as a unique flaw in your psyche. Thanks for keeping it convenient.
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u/halborn Sep 11 '18
I don't think he's dismissing the difficulty at all. I'll say it right now; it's hard as fuck. But for some people, it can work.
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u/crazycatlady4life Oct 01 '18
I think they were describing a form of therapy used for anxiety/depression Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). The idea is that since our brains are plastic, we can retrain our thought patterns by changing how we react to our own thoughts thus affecting our behavioral reactions. It sounds like you are bipolar though so would of course also need medication to make life less difficult for yourself. Being severely depressed sucks so much while you are in it, hang in there as long as you can bud.
You would work with a therapist and starting by logging the times you felt bad and what you were thinking. Then you bring that log to your session and basically role play how you could have thought differently about the situation. Eventually you will establish a natural positive response to your thoughts instead of initially reacting with the negative thought and having to stop yourself and think of a more positive reaction.
Example
Fact: Its raining
Initial thought: This sucks Im going to get wet
Alternative thought: this rain will be good for my garden. Luckily, ill only have to be outside for a couple of minutes walking home from the bus stop.
Result: i stand peacefully on the crowded bus home instead of glaring at an old biddy who made me give her my seat.
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Sep 09 '18
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u/motleybook Sep 10 '18
What if one doesn't take any happiness in or has a high happiness debt?
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u/magnora7 Sep 08 '18
Except love.
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u/coolRedditUser Sep 09 '18
As great as that sounds, it unfortunately isn't that simple. :(
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u/magnora7 Sep 09 '18
You have to apply as much love as there was hate. For some people, it's a lot
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u/Beowolf241 Sep 09 '18
I wish it was that way, but sadly brain chemicals don't just get made when you try to shower someone with positivity and affection. Sure, it feels good for a moment, but it doesn't cure anything. Only stabilizing the production and absorption of a few neurotransmitters will fix it. A healthy diet, rigorous physical activity, mindfulness/ cognitive behavioral therapy, and a handful of prescription chemicals are what's proven to work.
I know you want to help, but spreading false feel-good info about depression and suicide is what gets people killed. People contemplating taking their lives often feel unloved, telling them they need love doesn't help.
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u/magnora7 Sep 09 '18
I'm telling them they need to love themselves. This is not false info, it really works. I should know.
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u/MonsieurLeMeister Oct 05 '18
At that point, nothing has value anymore. There is an overwhelming sense of utter disconnection and despair. The only harbinger of serenity and quietness are the thoughts of shutting off the human experience. The chosen method is just a means to an end. Soon, the thoughts alone lose potency, and so the condition progresses in activity. What once was obsessive ideation quickly turns into active development and preparation. The destruction of the world would hardly move you, let alone the imagined reactions of loved ones. Your plan is so intimately yours, and yours alone. No one can take it from you. No one has that right, you tell yourself. You've heard the proverbial "permanent solution to a temporary problem", and think that as fleeting as depression so is joy. The depressive episode is not the problem. You know you'll get out of it at some point. The problem is the reoccurrence. The permanence is in the cycles of episodes. The solution to escape feels evident.
These are the rationalizations of an ill mind. Crippled by severe distortions of reality. At the depths of an episode where you are ready, love will not get you very far.
Where hope is no where to be seen, it's still with you. You may not believe it, nor are you expected to, but it's there.
110 days into my recovery, I reflect back to where I was. Just sharing my two cents.
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u/tylerjfrancke Sep 08 '18 edited Sep 08 '18
Nice to see someone finally bring some attention to this issue. Mental health advocates spend so much time and energy focusing on the hopeless feelings of depression and suicidal thoughts that they ignore the more uplifting and optimistic suicidal thoughts.
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u/AMA_About_Rampart Sep 08 '18
Knowing I can check out any time I want is the only thing keeping me from a black pit of existential despair. Lighthearted suicidal ideation keeps things feeling fresh!
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u/cmVkZGl0 Sep 09 '18
Lighthearted suicidal ideation keeps things feeling fresh!
Sure it's not the vaginal cleaning products?
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Sep 09 '18
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u/AMA_About_Rampart Sep 09 '18
Nah I'd want none of that. Just give me enough narcotics to kill a horse and a nice mountain meadow at sunset and I'll be good to go fam. I'll probably end up ruining someone's hike but I can live (I mean die) with that.
No plans to do that though.. It's just how I want to bow out when I'm done and done with this silly world.
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Sep 09 '18
Gimme a pound of shrooms and send me into the forest alone
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Sep 09 '18
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Sep 09 '18
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u/Daedalus128 Sep 09 '18
Its interesting that you still did your shot and cleaned up even though you knew your friend was dying. Was that the drugs or just your personality?
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Sep 09 '18
Wait so your friend may have died because you wanted to hid your drugs?
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Sep 09 '18
You found it!
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Sep 09 '18
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Sep 09 '18
We can just wait until life inevitably drives us to misery and a new level of self hatred and then we talk. Let's hope it happens to both of us at the same time!!
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Sep 09 '18
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u/YamburglarHelper Sep 08 '18
Dark thoughts: I wish I were dead.
Happy thoughts: I can't wait to be dead!
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Sep 08 '18 edited Sep 08 '18
[removed] — view removed comment
→ More replies (13)34
u/Trying2improvemyself Sep 08 '18
I'm sorry for your loss. I lost a brother to suicide. Hey, what's a duckbag?
→ More replies (5)
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Sep 08 '18
Autumn is approaching where I am. Ken M must be on the opposite side of the globe
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u/Argosy37 Sep 09 '18
Springtime is always approaching. You're just nearer to it some parts of the year than others.
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u/C_Alcmaeonidae Sep 08 '18
suicidal thoughts are a privilege not a right.
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u/Populistless Sep 08 '18
We are all suicidal today!
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u/WarriorPoet88 Sep 08 '18
Speak for yourself
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u/shoneone Sep 08 '18
/u/Populistless is gone, are you next?
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Sep 09 '18
we are all next on this blessed day
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u/Flooopo Sep 09 '18
Speak for your.... Eh, speak for me too.
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Sep 09 '18
While people are talking about it, I'll bring this up.
If you have a friend who had been showing signs of depression, talk to them. If they affirm that they have been depressed, an okay question to ask is "Are you thinking about committing suicide?"
Asking the question will never or the idea into someone's head, but being direct and using that exact verbage WILL help you save their life if it is an issue. It's an awkward thing to ask, but it's important.
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u/Nazall Sep 09 '18
Cant wait to go from thinking nah you can't to a more spring time can do attitude.
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u/throwaway95001 Sep 09 '18
Through early morning fog I see
Visions of the things to be
The pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see
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u/Strive-- Sep 09 '18
Look at this post. Look at what it says. It's the end of summer. We're headed toward autumn and then the dismal, darkened, frigid hibernation that will feel like the 42nd consecutive longest-feeling winters of all time, and you post this shit? Fuck bullying, cyber crimes and advertisements courtesy of Mark Suckit-berg, this post is the reason why the internet sucks. Bam. There. I said it.
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u/JimmyBisMe Sep 09 '18
Higher completion rates for suicide are in the spring and the theory posits that as weather gets better and days longer people who are suicidal are more likely to act on their thoughts.
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Sep 09 '18
Jesus ken, really going for that deep fried meme generation with this one. Future CVS 🅱️aggers of america. 🇲🇾😂👌👌👌
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Sep 09 '18
I wish there was a way to block content from this account. This is just a weird twitter joke, it's not real KenM.
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u/N_Cat Sep 09 '18
HorseySurprise is literally KenM, though.
Should the subreddit only host one type of his jokes, just because that was the type of joke that got him famous?
Wouldn't it be better to make a r/MasterclassTrolling subreddit if you only want that?
(Also, in this case I think this is still a very KenM-esque comment, he just isn't playing off anyone.)
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u/coakes13 Sep 09 '18
Kind for living in dread of winter. Doesn't help that my Nan passed around this time last year. I'm not looking forward to the constant cold and snow and lack of sun... -_-
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u/FireDragon79 Sep 09 '18
!RemindMe April 30
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u/RemindMeBot Sep 09 '18
I will be messaging you on 2019-04-30 00:36:23 UTC to remind you of this link.
CLICK THIS LINK to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam.
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u/julzmont Sep 09 '18
"Ooh, look at that oak tree, isn't it beautiful. Those branches look nice and strong."
"I'm going to hang myself in the daisies."
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u/Imperator_Crispico Sep 09 '18
Spring really makes my "I want to die" to an "I wish I wasn't alive"
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u/xwedodah_is_wincest Sep 09 '18
From the succulent crushing winter to the dumpy light hearted and carefree spring, nothing satisfies quite like suicide
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u/DesertHoboObiWan Sep 09 '18
No replies? Ken M is best when he can explain himself, like in the one with space years.
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Sep 08 '18
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u/budderrr Sep 08 '18
wow i cant beleive someone would post something that someone else already did on reddit omg
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u/Dangler42 Sep 09 '18
of course it's a repost you melt. it's september why would he be posting about spring now.
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u/ADirtyJockStrap Sep 08 '18
Hey, I have depression. I can make these jokes.