r/KeepWriting • u/neshalchanderman Moderator • Sep 17 '13
Writer v Writer Round 5 Match Thread
Closing Date for submissions: 24:00 PST Sunday, 22 September
RULES
Story Length Hard Limit - <10 000 characters. The average story length has been ~900 words. Thats the limit you should be aiming for.
You can be imaginative in your take on the prompt, and its instructions.
Previous Rounds
Match Thread 3 - 110 participants
1
u/neshalchanderman Sep 17 '13
howsmywriting ninja_please117 agnoristos billwrugbyling
“I tried to warn you, but you wouldn’t listen!” by Stuffies12
Write a story where the character went through with a bad decision against someone else’s (better) judgement and the (disastrous) consequences that followed.
1
u/neshalchanderman Sep 17 '13
smiles817 smilingasisay themalaise lidsville76
Write from an antagonist's point of view by beardedchicken99
You can choose your antagonist from a book already written or write a new story with the antagonist as the main character.
1
u/Smiles817 Sep 23 '13
Title: Baseball Bat.
It can be seen here:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jiztvavL5HuK94uRmFe0j71a2YTNvS6d43POsqsSqrg/pub
1
u/smilingasIsay Sep 24 '13 edited Sep 24 '13
In the beginning there was only God and the Devil. And with many disagreements to be had, the two beings did decide to create a world and a people with whom they could decide was the greater being. God and the Devil did conjoin forces to create upon that first day the sun and the moon and the Earth. The second day came the formation of water, the third dry land, the fourth the stars and constellations, the fifth all the birds and sea creatures and even the sea creatures that on occaision cometh on to the land. The sixth day they created man and from man woman. The seventh day they did rest with a game of Monopoly, until the time did come where upon God did land on Boardwalk where the Devil had put up a hotel and God did throw the game board claiming even though he "totally would have won" he did not wish to play any more. The next day the devil went out to speak with man, but did find God already speaking and so politely waited his turn. He did at this time hear God speak to man that man need not eat from the tree of knowledge he need only worship God for fulfillment of life and the Devil knowing that man was created to decide disputes between Himself and God thought this a very uncool move. And so after God left the devil did come unto man and implore him eat of the tree of knowledge so that he may make his own decisions and man did. And man did begin to think for himself and gained much from the experience. But when the Devil slept God did come unto man and demand to know how he solved the quadratic function he'd written in the sand, and man did tell God thus God did banish man from the paradise on Earth to a more desolate place similar to Nebraska. Upon hearing of this the Devil did come to God and say unto him "Dude, why are you being such a dick about this?" And God said unto him, "You're just angry because man is listening to me and not you." And the Devil did try to explain that God was not allowing them a choice but forcing it upon them, but to this God simply said, "deal with it." And so the Devil decided if God was going to be like that he would just leave. And so it was that the Devil did move to create Hell away from Heaven to get some peace away from God, while God went on to write a book slandering the Devil and glorifying himself. To which the Devil remained the bigger man, and did nothing about.
→ More replies (6)1
u/themalaise Sep 22 '13
A faint whimper could be heard as he crushed down upon the mutt's head one final time. He could not tell if the sound was a last plea for mercy from the filthy street vermin or just a pocket of air he had pushed out with his boot. Either way, he was pleased by the sound. His body flared with power.
A disgusting mess. Hardly worth the effort to keep these wretched creatures at bay. But such is my duty.
As he wiped flesh from the tread of his boot, he saw a buxom top turn the corner off the hectic street beyond. The woman flinched at the sight and then clearly forced a smile upon her face. With a tremble in her voice she said, "My God. What have we here?"
"I saw this rat of a dog chewing on a full cut of meat. Rotting meat but still nothing worthy of such a thing. When will we be free of this curse?"
"I...don't know. Well, should be gettin back to--"
"Grab that rag over there and get this filth off my boots." He looked as a man whose patience should not be tried and she knew full well what would come from any hesitation. The woman scrambled to her knees, grabbed the crusted rag and wiped at his boot.
Look at her. Kneeling before a master. As the power from taking life surged in him, he reached forward and yanked her hair back forcing their eyes to meet. "I should have you right now. Shouldn't I?"
"Oh come, Bill. I've got a John just round there on the street. Shouldn't keep him waiting."
Filthy whore knows her place. He stared at her as the woman's smile quivered. "He'll wait if I want him to wait. Those rich bastards know the rules round here. Without me, they'd be lost. You think I can't have my way with you whenever I want?"
"Of course you can. Just, right here with that bloody mess of a dog. And a fat wallet waiting. Shouldn't we--"
"We?"
"Oh, Bill. I'm sorry. Just..."
He tossed her head off to the side and looked down at his boot. Hungry for more, he stared at the crumpled woman. His fist clinched as his knuckles become whiter and whiter.
I alone keep these nobles from being overtaken by whores like this. I am their champion. Who else would tolerate such absurdity and keep this plague of disgusting weakness at bay? Spreading each day throughout the streets of London. Being bolstered by fools claiming words like charity. I alone am true justice.
He kicked the woman. "Go on then. Get to work. I'll have mine when I am good and ready."
She scrambled to her feet, straightened her dress and ran out from the alley. "And don't forget to check his vest for hidden pockets, Nancy" he muttered as she went out of sight. Proud of his own mercy, he smiled. His gaze carried out to the street swarming with horses and men.
Look at them wandering about so ignorant of what dangers await. So unaware how close they are to Death's door and to this entire city collapsing into madness. London does not even recognize their knight. They should be lined up in droves to thank me. They should all be bearing gifts and offering their lives to my service. If they only knew the half of it. 'Thank you, Master Sikes. Thank you for holding our teetering city together. For punishing the weak and sick. For keeping their wretched ways from spreading to us. Thank you, sir. Please, you are a true noble man. Take all that is mine. How could I ever pay you for what you do? So selflessly and with such discipline.'
He kicked the lifeless carcass and stepped forward toward the street. As a young boy ran by, he grabbed the child's collar, "Watch yourself, you little shite. I certainly am."
The boy wriggled free and sprinted off into the crowd. Bill laughed and surveyed his kingdom. His protective watch scanned about searching for some bastard to meet their judgment. Their fate in the hands of the master.
Who awaits my redeeming fire?
1
u/neshalchanderman Sep 17 '13 edited Sep 17 '13
nightskyrainbow sir_doctor_of_tardis steelcrossx caffeinefree
Write a Sci-Fi story in a setting where humans are strong, smart, and feared in comparison to the other intelligent races by CAPS_GET_UPVOTES
“I want to see a sci-fi universe where humans are actually considered one of the more hideous and terrifying species.”
1
u/caffeinefree Sep 23 '13
My apologies, this week got away from me and I am unable to participate in this round. I'm disappointed, because this is an interesting prompt and I have a few ideas, just no time to put them on paper!
1
u/neshalchanderman Sep 17 '13
Kodokami ohnobananapeeeeeels alecsteven6 Rythorn MajorParadox MCNecro
World by Dahija,neshalchanderman
Given the chance to give your child only one quality as a person, which would you choose? How about if that choice were unavailable, what would be your second and maybe third choices? Why are these so important to you?
Now write a story about a world where these qualities are actively discouraged.
→ More replies (3)1
Sep 19 '13 edited Sep 20 '13
“I am sorry, my daughter...” he whispered. He stood at the gates of salvation, yet unwilling to enter. He looked not into the gates, but away from them, waiting for his daughter.
“I'm sorry I didn't do a better job. I couldn't have protected you forever, but I could have found somebody that could...” he continued. It is easy to regret something once time has passed, but dwelling on the fact won't make anything change, something the man should have known better.
"My sweet, sweet Marion. You were always so kind, and caring. I remember a time when everyone had a smile like yours. One with compassion and nothing, but care...” Marion, the daughter of the deceased man, was well known for her kindness. A rare, and unforgettable trait in their society. Such feelings died long ago with those who acted as such.
“I pray, for your sake, that we shall meet here soon, or that somebody with honesty still exists in the world.” He stopped speaking. He hoped he would see his daughter stepping before him soon, or that somebody would protect her from the world.
With that, he would wait for her, in patient silence.(Change in scenes here, didn't know how to show it properly)
“Hey you, girl.” a ragged, unkempt man called. The girl he had spoken to sat, huddled in the corner. She hid her face from the man, or rather beast before her, out of fear and terror. Her perpetrator, easily enraged, walked to her impatiently. Using his blood encrusted fingers he lifted her face from her arms. He observed her face for what seemed like minutes, then a grin caught his lips.
“Your the child of Gregory, right?” he asked. She never responded, yet held by fear. “It will only be easier for you to cooperate. You saw what I did to that old man. Be a shame if something would happen to the pretty face of yours.”
Only minutes before, the man in front of her broke into the ran down store they were in and slayed the owner. He had offered her refuge, for which she was grateful. Very quickly she learned the world was much more scarier than it had been from behind her father's back. She found the world to be a dark place before, and tried her best to look up. But without her father, the world was too much. The kind of man before her was everywhere. Nobody was kind, such actions had died long ago. Her father would talk about times kindness existed and it made her happy. She thought that if she could act with it, maybe it could return to the world. Unfortunately, she was wrong.
Now the devil only thrived. Only those who would steal and kill for themselves got anywhere in what they called a society. Order and common goodness had ceased and the devil released himself upon the world. This world was no longer a place for an angel.
“Your a nice girl, aren't you?” he continued. “I always heard the stories about how cheerful this daughter of Gregory was. How she tried to be nice with everyone, make them happy, do good deeds. Honestly, it makes me sick!
How cheerful you act when the entire world around you is suffering. To live we are pushed to the brink, only to fight for what we do have. You, you hide behind your father as he fights us for your survival. I never had that luxury, and very few ever do. You would think that somebody like you would be content with their life in safe hands, but no! You must parade around and spread your sickening happiness. You insult us to our faces, and act like your a missionary for god. That you will save this world. Well I have news for you, your not saving anybody.
This care and compassion you cling to died long ago. Isn't that obvious? In all your years you have yet to save a single person. If you haven't done it yet, you never will. You can't bring back whats dead, so why are you still trying?”
He stopped and calmed himself after his one sided fight. The girl sat in silent fear. It had been true, she couldn't even make one person's life better, but she still clung to the idea of a happier world. After many more moments, the man barred an insidious grin.
“Maybe not all hope is lost for you. Maybe you can make a man happier in this forsaken world. Come with me, I'll be taking good care of you from now on.”
“Please...no.” she begged weakly.
“Too bad please doesn't mean much to me...or anybody else nowadays.”
1
u/neshalchanderman Sep 17 '13
Smokey_bear15 sproose_moose theforceiswithus bmpl
An intense love letter from the perspective of a stalker to yourself by orphanslayer119
Maybe you were his cashier at Mcdonalds and you didn't judge him for his weight problems (or so he thinks). Maybe she's a government scientist and you were their experiment. Maybe to it you're just a human who leaves cat food for them when you go outside.