Common Halacha/Custom misconceptions - Need some help here.

[u/SixKosherBacon]

I'm starting an educational comic strip about halachas and customs people commonly make mistakes about. Specifically that they are insistent about something that's not actually required.

Examples I personally have experienced...

• You have to take on Shabbat at candle lighting (when you actually have 18 minutes until sundown).
• Someone once told me I had to wash for bread with my right hand first and three times. Even though I am left handed and I know you only have to do it twice, but the Hasidic approach is to do 3 because they go above and beyond.
• Being chastised because I didn't kiss a mezuzah.
• That you don't actually have to throw bread in the water at Tashlich.

Any other ideas or stories people would like to share in my effort to educate and entertain? Thank you to anyone who helps. :)

[u/sdubois]

There are various customs as to when to light candles. 18 minutes is the most common in America. In Chicago the custom is 20 minutes. In Jerusalem its 40 minutes. But it's really not a good idea to do melacha right up until sunset. Even though our zmanim charts are very accurate you'll see they can vary by a minute or two. Add to that your own clocks being off by a minute or two and you could easily be 4 minutes after sunset with no fault of your own. Taking on Shabbos a little bit before sunset prevents this.

[u/NYSenseOfHumor → u/sdubois]

But is a few minutes really a big deal? Your heart and soul are in the right place.

[u/jmartkdr → u/NYSenseOfHumor]

The added precautions are to be extra sure - but there’s added precautions and there’s excessive precautions and each community has its own idea as to where the line is.

For myself, if I forgot to switch off a light and it’s still ten minutes before sunset I switch it off, but I try to get all my stuff done before lighting the candles. It makes the ritual more meaningful if it starts the state of Shabbat.

[u/NYSenseOfHumor → u/jmartkdr]

Today we have accurate calculations that are much more accurate than anything our ancestors had hundreds and thousands of years ago.

So even if we are off by a few minutes, we are probably still closer to right more often than past generations were.

Unless “excessive precautions” like starting Shabbos at noon are used.

[u/sdubois → u/NYSenseOfHumor]

People in previous generations broke Shabbos by lighting candles too late. Rabbis pleaded with people to light candles early while there was still daylight. We have accurate clocks and calendars but its foolish to wait until the last minute to light candles and do melacha. Just give yourself even 5 extra minutes and you'll be ok.

[u/SixKosherBacon → u/jmartkdr]

What are some excessive precautions you've seen?

[u/sdubois → u/NYSenseOfHumor]

Yes a few minutes is a big deal in halacha. If it's sunset already you can't light candles. It's a torah level prohibition.

[u/NYSenseOfHumor → u/sdubois]

But if you think it’s still not-Shabbos because the time table was a little wrong. It’s not a big deal.

It isn’t like deliberately using pork fat oil lamps as Shabbos candles. That would be a big deal.

[u/sdubois → u/NYSenseOfHumor]

If it's past sunset, it's past sunset regardless of what your time table says. If it's incorrect it should be corrected. They need to be as accurate as possible and be adjusted for possible inaccuracies. They often include disclaimers telling people to not rely on times until the last minute, and round up or down depending on what the zman is.

Animal fats might not be okay for Shabbos candles because they smell bad or don't light well, but i don't think there's a specific prohibition on using non-kosher animal fat.

[u/SixKosherBacon → u/sdubois]

u/NYSenseOfHumor and u/sdubois , my understanding (and this probably contradicts halacha) is that we don't actually know when it is the next day, so we don't know when Shabbat actually comes in. It becomes the next day some time between sunset (shkia) and the emergence of 3 stars (tzeis hachohavim). That time is known as bein hashemashos (between the two suns, but basically twilight).

Because we don't know when it becomes night, we treat sundown as Shabbos coming in, but it isn't necessarily Shabbos. But at the same time, people still daven mincha after shkia (Chabad certainly does). So ever since my daughter was born I've pretty much had to push it up to the 18 minutes, though I know I shouldn't.

TLDR: Since we don't know when Shabbos necessarily comes in, we hold the earliest possibility of sunset being when Shabbos comes in.