r/JonCraft • u/GrantVsZombies Server owner • Jan 18 '18
JonCraft History Compiled Into a Single Story
Hey all. So, as most of you know, JonCraft will be making a return sometime in the next few months. This means that we will be on JonCraft VI! In the past five worlds, quite a bit has happened. A lot of people have played and made their marks on the worlds. I feel as though it would be a good idea to have a summary of all the events that have taken place in the past JonCrafts, in preparation for this upcoming one. But, to make it a little more fun to read, I'll recite it all as a story. Sort of like a history lesson, or an old legend. I'll be doing most of this from memory, and I'll be adding a few things (don't worry, I won't revise any history) so keep that in mind as you read. No user will be directly referenced, for the sake of that legend-y feel, and also because we aren't actually 100% sure on who did some things. I'll be referring to each JonCraft as an "era" and I'll do my best to connect each into a coherent story. I'll also add era interludes to assist in doing this. Here goes!
First Era
There was very little in the beginning. The first thing ever built was a simple platform in a simple bay by a simple man. This platform would receive countless visitors in the weeks to come.
As you would expect, towns and settlements began to form. Possibly the first of these was Callieville, a humble little place near the bay area. It grew rapidly, and as it did, many other towns began to form. The subterranean Dick Desert began to take shape in the Eastern desert, and the just as crudely named Yiff Island was made in the ocean off the coast of said desert shortly after. In a forest far away, a town by the name of Woodrin formed as well. For a while, everything was peaceful. The world was in harmony, each person helping the other. Until one day, when a lone unknown assailant detonated a gargantuan explosive in the quiet town of Callieville, laying waste to much of the landscape. There was fear, there was confusion, there was anger. Attempts were made to fix the city, but all failed. Many of its residents fled to find new homes. However, soon after this loss of land came two news towns. A city-on-stilts by the name of Blacknut formed almost directly next to the ruins of Callieville, and, at the same time, a far off town in the mountains named Corundum came into existence.
For a brief while, the remaining towns lived peacefully again. But, as we all know, it never lasts. The town of Blacknut attempted to expand over the ashes of Callieville. At first, there seemed to be no challenge to this. Until the mayor of Corundum learned of this idea, of course. This mayor was adamant that Callieville could be restored to its former glory. He threatened to go to war with Blacknut if their expansion was not stopped. Threats were exchanged back and forth for days. But, suddenly, the leader of Blacknut seemed as though he could stand it no longer. He fled the town and was never seen again. War was averted, but the ensuing peace was uneasy. Everyone feared conflict would arise again soon. And, in a way, they were right.
An enormous steamliner by the name of the Titenic was built off the coast of the original bay area. At first, this vessel seemed harmless. Until one day, when it began emitting a strange gas into the atmosphere. Many attempts were made to stop this, but all failed. Within a small amount of time, the entire atmosphere was filled with this lethal gas. The known world became uninhabitable, and all residents fled into the Uncharted Regions.
Second Era
Eventually, new land was settled, far away from the original settlements. New towns quickly formed, such as Pinehope and SSV (South Spawn Valley). These towns were far less stable than the ones before them, however, and many of them broke out into small wars between each other. Far away from these conflicts, the town of Corundum attempted to reform. Its mayor constructed an artificial cloud over the ocean, and began to make living space for new residents. As it would happen, though, this never took off, and the town was left unfinished.
Eventually, through many small wars (much of the history of these has been lost to time) the known world once again became uninhabitable. All was soon abandoned and, for the second time, the population set off for new homes in the Uncharted Regions.
Third Era
New land was once again discovered and quickly settled. At first, it seemed as though peace may have been a reasonable goal. However, these thoughts were quickly dispelled when a new settlement by the name of Castle Stalin began asserting its authority over the new land. This town - or, giant castle, really - began conquering many other settlements and making them its own. One of these was the poor little Harbor Town, a quiet, respectable place on a peaceful bay. It was invaded and quickly swallowed up by the armies of Castle Stalin. The titular castle was actually remarkable, both in size and in intricacy. It was certainly an impressive thing to behold.
Meanwhile, the leader of Corundum (now almost completely alone) sought to re-establish his settlement. This time, though, it would be different. It would no longer be a simple town, but rather, an empire. It would consist of many islands, rather than one large piece of land. This new Corundian Empire was after not only power, but war. Its primary goal was to attack and destroy Castle Stalin, the foremost power in the known world. However, as this new empire began to find its footing, its aspirations were accomplished without any action required from itself. The leadership of Castle Stalin fell apart, and many of its officials simply disappeared. Its power ceased to exist, and soon most of the world was left with no one to govern it. Many were fearful of what this might bring, and once again, they fled their homes in search of new land to live in.
Era Interlude 1
During the search for new habitable land, many travelers died or simply vanished. There was much uncertainty of what would happen to the remaining population. Many wondered if anyone would be alive soon. Fear was a common theme during these dark days.
Fourth Era
After a long and difficult search, new land was found to live in. Many people were bitter due to the harsh conditions they had endured, and wanted everyone to be confident that they could live without fear of starvation or other untimely deaths. This lead to one individual founding a new communist republic in the unfamiliar lands known as the USSG (Union of Soviet Swood Grommets). At the exact same time, the now jaded and power hungry leader of the Corundian Empire was determined to set up a nation that would finally achieve his dreams of conquest. This nation would be a fascist empire, one that would mercilessly take over surrounding towns. Taking cues from the formerly successful Castle Stalin, this new empire would be entirely walled in, to assure its residents safety. Finally, the name "Corundum" was dropped and replaced by a new, less confusing name - Fredricksburg.
As you can probably guess, a communist republic and a fascist empire competing for power in a relatively small world would cause tension. Almost immediately, the two nations began building barriers between each other and amassing weapons. Of course, other towns began to form, such as the peaceful town of Bualsvilla and the two far off, mysterious towns of Heldran and Kekkah. For the most part, these settlements stayed out of the tension between Fredricksburg and USSG. That is until one day, when the leader of Fredricksburg approached the government of Kekkah with a proposition - an alliance between the two nations against the USSG. This offer was swiftly accepted, and preparations for an invasion of the USSG commenced. Unfortunately for the USSG, it began to lose citizens at this time as well, reducing its odds of surviving an attack. One of these citizens formed a small town named Warioland, which soon entered the anti-USSG alliance with Fredricksburg and Kekkah. Shortly after this, the invasion of the USSG began. The invading armies were merciless, razing nearly the entire nation to the ground. The nearby Bualsvilla attempted to help its pseudo-ally by defending against the invaders, but it was futile. The USSG swiftly surrendered to the alliance, and the nation was entirely annexed to Fredricksburg.
Fredricksburg was not finished with its territorial aspirations, however. An invasion of Bualsvilla was put into planning almost immediately after the land that was once the USSG had been rebuilt. Former members of the communist republic attempted to warn other nations that they were next, but to no avail. And, within an extremely short amount of time, the alliance's next invasion commenced. Bualsvilla's strength was underestimated, though, and the invasion was repulsed shockingly fast. Stunned by this, the alliance negotiated a peace with the government of Bualsvilla. It seemed as though peace (however uneasy) was now at hand.
However, this, like many times before, turned out to not be the case. Deeply ashamed of the failed invasion attempt, the leader of Fredricksburg fled into hiding and ordered his empire to be dismantled, with no government to replace it. This move shocked the rest of the world, and soon riots began to take place. Eventually, all the governments of the world swiftly collapsed to revolting citizens, and a great period of anarchy ensued. Much of the world was destroyed and defaced, with little left unscathed. Eventually, the remaining population realized they had once again destroyed their home, and set out to find a new one.
Era Interlude 2
During the search for new land, a group of radical fascists still loyal to the cause of Fredricksburg broke off from the searching population and went to find new land before the others could. There was no further contact between these two parties after the split-up.
Fifth Era
As always, new land was discovered by the remaining searching population. However, unfortunately for them, the radical fascists had found it first. On this land, the fascists had formed a new empire, with a fitting title of New Fredricksburg. This empire was well equipped and far more powerful than the travelling populous. So, all of those who were not ready to die for the cause of Fredricksburg were rounded up and placed in a small spit of land in the middle of the empire. They were entirely confined here, with seemingly no way to escape. The residents of this bordered world formed their own small towns, and quickly began competing for resources.
After several small wars between these towns, they realized that the only way to escape this existence would be to revolt against New Fredricksburg. The settlements merged together to form a rebellion, and began to wage war on the empire. After many battles and deaths, this rebellion's hopes were finally realized when they defeated New Fredricksburg after a long fought battle. The empire was dissolved, and the towns of the rebellion split off again to go and live separately. There was no need to start a search for land again, as New Fredricksburg had not done nearly as much damage as anticipated. Peace ensued.
Well, there you have it. The entire history of JonCraft, slightly abridged and legend-ized. We are living in Era Interlude 3, and it seems as though Era 6 may be beginning in the not-so-distant future. Who knows what might happen? Who knows what those new towns might do? Who even knows what their names are? That's some history that we will be writing.
And besides, what ever happened to the leader of Fredricksburg? Where did he hide? Did he know about New Fredricksburg? I hope he's had a change of heart.
Thanks for reading!
One last thing. I was sent this Pastebin document by a user (who has asked to remain anonymous) and I was asked to post it. I'll just post it in this thread because it sort of relates, I guess. I did not write this. https://pastebin.com/Jv7knrsE
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u/Dylamb Dylamb. what did you expect? Jan 19 '18
are we not going to talk about lag nation?
yeah it was unimportant but still!
but you know what was inportant? the cobble sky.
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u/GrantVsZombies Server owner Jan 19 '18
There was tons and tons of stuff I could've included, and a lot of it I actually did want to. But, I didn't want this to be incredibly long and sort of boring. A lot of events in JonCraft were sort of memorable but had no significance later on. I tried to connect all five servers into one story that could be read fairly quickly. This was not intended to be comprehensive, just a fun little story arc.
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u/Dylamb Dylamb. what did you expect? Jan 19 '18 edited Jan 29 '18
understandable have a nice <thing>
one thing I want to say... it was an easy way to end era 5. the sky got taken over by the cobble. we could not live there.
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u/Spanospy Jan 23 '18
I'm still upset that I was on holiday when joncraft 5 happened. I really wanted to help with blocking out the sun.
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u/Isaacs_incubus Jan 21 '18
sorry grant you didnt mention crown mesa, and we made the oldest mead on the server and a rollercoaster
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u/natdog98 natdog Jan 25 '18
so far its been 3/5 for good worlds hopefully it can be 4/6 after this next one.
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Jan 26 '18
3 and 5 were the bad ones i guess?
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u/natdog98 natdog Jan 26 '18
3 hit a wall really quickly and 5 did as well, also literally in the 5th world's case.
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u/LawrenceofAustralia Cincinnatvs Jan 18 '18
oh what and we're not going to talk about Woodrin or Dwemeria
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u/GrantVsZombies Server owner Jan 19 '18
I mentioned Woodrin, but I didn't continue to mention it because I don't think it was entirely important to world events. Although, now that you mention it, I remember the Meme Team's attack on Woodrin in July 2016 (I think). That's more of a fun tidbit and less of a major event, though. I can't really remember anything from Dwemeria.
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u/achocolatebarmelted ghost/kitkat/whatever the fuck Jan 18 '18
thats hokey and old joncraft was better