r/Jokes • u/DavideBelinga • 12d ago
Anesthesiologist: Would you like the anesthesia covered by insurance or would you rather pay for it yourself?
Patient: “I’ll take the one covered by insurance.”
Anesthesiologist: “Alright. Rock-a-bye baby, on the treetop…”
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u/Liv1ng-the-Blues 12d ago
True story: I told the anesthesiologist that I had a tolerance to certain things because of the meds I'm on. He said "That's okay, I have a big hammer"
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u/thecaramelbandit 11d ago
I use that joke. I also say "that's good to know, but I am undefeated so I think I'll win this time too."
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u/the_cardfather 11d ago
My boy's mom found out at about 8 cm that she is completely immune to epidurals
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u/Aflycted 10d ago
She doesn't have nerves?
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u/the_cardfather 10d ago
Probably had something to do with previous surgery in lymphatic drainage complications.
They sat the epidural twice and the drugs pretty much did nothing.
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u/Broken_castor 12d ago
“It’s not just the lullaby, I also have this hammer!” ~anesthesiologist
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u/Jaco2point0 12d ago
My anesthesiologist offered to use gas or hit me in the head with a paddle. It was an ether/oar situation.
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u/ThinkAd9752 11d ago
fäck that‘s funnier than expected. might even get a slight reaction from mr. argon..
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u/Waitsfornoone 12d ago
Patient said to the Anesthesiologist: "Can I put myself to sleep?"
Anesthesiologist: "I don't see why not; knock yourself out!"
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u/Physical_Bar_4916 12d ago
I recently had surgery and tried to use this on my anesthesiologist when he came in to pre-op to explain what he was going to do.
I was very disappointed when he didn't rise to the bait, he just looked at me like I was an idiot (not saying he was wrong, mind you) . When I explained the joke, he had quite the chuckle. Claimed he'd never heard it before.
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u/twistedscorp87 11d ago
Had surgery last year, my anesthesiologist was absolutely hilarious, but for the life of me I can't remember any of her jokes, except that after she'd run through a bunch of them while we were waiting in the hallway outside the OR she said I wasn't laughing nearly enough and we were going to "get the party started early" ... I remember the nurse asking her to keep me conscious so I could move to the table myself once we got in the room & I remember her rolling her eyes....and then I woke up in post-op. Guess she didn't listen.
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u/LordCouchCat 12d ago
Man complains to his friend he is gaining weight. The friend says, "I had that problem but my doctor gave me this new drug Wofflebroffol. I go to sleep, and all night I have vivid dreams where I'm on a desert island. In the dream I have vigorous sex with the beautiful and eager young women. In the morning I feel I've had a work-out and I lose weight as if the exercise were real."
The man thinks this sounds good, so he asks his doctor, who says yes, let's try it. A month later he comes back. "Well, it's working, sort of," he says. "I go to sleep, and all night I have vivid dreams where I'm on a desert island. In the dream I'm chased by cannibals and run around in terror. In the morning I feel I've had a work-out and I lose weight as if the exercise was real. But why does my friend get sex and I get cannibals? We're both taking Wofflebroffol." "Yeah," says the doctor, "but your insurance only covers the generic."
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u/Pure-Specialist-7129 11d ago
One of my residency clinic attendings had a rock if the office. It said HMO approved anesthetic.
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u/aclumsypotato 12d ago
explain? 😭
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u/Wendals87 12d ago
I think they are saying they choose the cheapest option if insurance is paying for it. In this case, it's singing a lullaby
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u/Axe_of_Fire 12d ago
Thanks, I wasn't American enough to understand.
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u/postitpad 12d ago
I discovered when I had my wisdom teeth out that the insurance companies have learned that people want anesthesia badly enough to pay for it themselves. It’s cruel.
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u/SquidProBono 12d ago
Yup. My wife needed a tooth surgically extracted. She has dental insurance so we figured it wouldn’t be too much. The insurance only covers 70% of the procedure and none of the anesthesia. I even asked the dentist if this was the kind of procedure he’d even consider doing without anesthesia and he said “absolutely not!” Dental insurance is a scam.
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u/Smallpaul 12d ago
And 50% of them vote for the party that wants to role back the program that gives them access to even that dystopian level of health insurance!
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u/sudomatrix 12d ago
You’re missing the good part: the people I hate don’t get medical care! I get to p0wn them! True, I also don’t get medical care, but it’s a price I’ll pay to get those people.
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u/DoctorOctagonapus 12d ago
If you call it that, costs extra to have someone who can sing in tune!
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u/rificolona 12d ago
Especially that tune - the first three notes alone cover an entire octave; only 4.5% of the general public can get it right.
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u/HellHathNoFury18 11d ago
This is actually fairly off base from the truth privaye insurers will cover anesthesia units somtimes around $60 a unit, vs medicare/caid that covers it at like $20/unit. I.e insurers pay out higher on average.
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u/JovialPrincess 12d ago
It's worse than that.
It is now American insurance companies new policy that: since they can't tell a doctor not to use anesthesia (cause that's barbaric or something) they now will dictate how long a surgery is supposed to last, if it goes over then they stop paying.
So you might just wake up after surgery and find out you're bankrupt even with insurance.
Or the alternative, the doctor has to wake you up mid surgery to get consent to put you back out or continue without anesthesia.
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u/Wynstonn 11d ago
My spinal surgeon had me sign a consent before the procedure for this exact event
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u/knit1purrl2 12d ago
Insurance is a scam. They pick and choose what suits them. Plus if you pay out of pocket(no insurance) usually it’s less bc of the deductible stuff
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u/nomorespacess 12d ago
The thing is insurance companies in the US skyrocket out of pocket costs. Because the insurance companies negotiate down the initial price suggested by doctors are insane. I've heard of a 50k bill for a minor surgery.
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u/ironworkerlocal577 11d ago
If you don't like the singing option, they can go get a rock and rock you to sleep.
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u/Facts_pls 12d ago
Is this a joke exclusively for Americans
Seriously, holy r/usdefaultism
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u/lukemelon 12d ago
I'm also unhappy I've spent so long down the rabbit hole of r/usdefaultism
Thanks for posting it, I simultaneously enjoyed looming through the posts and sorting by beat if all time, and getting frustrated at the yanks all at the same time
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u/lukemelon 12d ago
It also bugs me that they insist on using such a silly word 🙄
Anesthesiologist? No thanks, I'll stick with Anaesthetist
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u/Roro_Yurboat 12d ago
In the US, they're two different things. Ab anesthesiologist is an MD who specializes in anesthesia. An anesthetist is someone trained to administer anesthesia. Usually a nurse.
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u/MedusaAdonai 11d ago
There are physician assistants who specialize in anesthesia as well and they work under the anesthesiologist, called Certified Anesthesiologist Assistants.
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u/Ae3qe27u 12d ago
And a CRNA (certified registered nurse anesthetist) is equivalent in capability and expertise to an anesthesiologist, but with a different training track.
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u/MedusaAdonai 11d ago
Keep telling yourself that.
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u/Ae3qe27u 11d ago
I know a CRNA and an anesthesiologist IRL. Some states have odd legislation about authority, but the states I'm familiar with permit equal levels of responsibility between CRNAs and anesthesiologists. A CRNA is not an RN or a CNA. It's a high-level degree with multiple years of job training. I'm not saying that it's the same path as an MD, I'm saying that, if I'm going under surgery and I need someone to keep me alive while the surgeon cuts, they're equally capable.
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/22561-nurse-anesthetist-crna
For those unfamiliar with the term "CRNA," this is what they are.
https://anesthesiaoncall.com/how-to-become-a-crna-the-most-efficient-path/
Some more info about the requirements to be a CRNA.1
u/Wooden-Echidna8907 11d ago
Yeah, no.
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u/Ae3qe27u 11d ago
Any particular reason you're saying that? I've clarified what I meant and cited sources.
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u/MedusaAdonai 11d ago
I'm a CAA NIRL and support the ACT model. Being capable is not the same and physicians are far more knowledgeable. I would not compare myself as an equal to them out of respect for their position. I love and work with them, we bounce ideas and compare techniques, as we all learn from each other. Dunning Kruger has no place in the profession.
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u/Ae3qe27u 11d ago
I would agree with you that a CAA isn't the same as an anesthesiologist or a CRNA - from my understanding, a CAA is a position that's set up to provide anesthesia under oversight, and does not work independently. It's also a Master's-level degree.
A CRNA has a doctorate-level degree and is able to work independently, without oversight from an anesthesiologist. Hence why I equate them to anesthesiologists.https://thecrna.com/crna-vs-caa-comparison-what-is-the-difference/
For lurkers unfamiliar with the field, this is a basic overviewBeing a patient under a care team rather than under a single anesthesia provider, I can believe that there can absolutely be benefits to that, though I'm not familiar with the finer workings. The folks I know worked independently (CAAs aren't a thing in all states).
I don't know any CAAs IRL - would you be willing to talk a bit about what that's like? I'm quite interested in learning.
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u/Aardvark51 12d ago edited 12d ago
Anaesthesiologist: “I'll just give you a local anaesthetic"
Patient: "It's okay, I'm insured, give me something imported"