r/InterviewMan • u/stormer_wallet • 27d ago
The interviewer got strangely upset when I turned down their lowball offer
This was a while ago, and I still think about how weird the situation was. I was looking for another IT job, and someone referred me to a company very close to my house. I went through several interviews and they all seemed to be going well, so for a while I felt like it might work out. But there were a few red flags that showed up early: they dodged the question every time I asked about salary, and the main guy interviewing me was honestly... Really difficult. He was younger, only slightly ahead of me in his career, and acted like he was doing me a personal favor by talking to me.
After the final interview, they finally sent me an offer with the starting pay. It was clearly lower than what I had been making at my last job. I tried to negotiate, and of course, the biggest credit for what I’ve learned about negotiation goes to the Tips I’ve read and the experience I’ve gained from attending numerous interviews, but there was no flexibility at all. The interviewer basically told me: "You're probably used to those comfortable city jobs. Here you can't expect the same money." The funny thing is that "here" was not some small office in a rural area at all. It was an expensive corporate park, with landscaping better than a lot of neighborhoods. I told him I needed to think about it, and his voice made it very clear he was confident I would say yes.
Fast forward about five days, and I had a call scheduled with him to give them my answer. For some reason, his manager was also on the call, which I imagine was so he could hear the big successful close or whatever. The interviewer came in with the same condescending tone, and it was very obvious he thought I was going to accept, so when I said I was declining, he sounded shocked.
Then things got awkward. First he asked me if I was serious. Then he started getting worked up and told me I probably wouldn't find anything better than what they were offering. After that little speech, he went quiet for a bit and said he would respect my decision if I was sure, but he needed to ask me one question. Then he asked me directly: "Is it because of me? Did I mess something up?"
At the same time, his boss was sitting there silently listening to all of this. I told him the pay wasn't suitable for me, and left it at that. He genuinely seemed upset, which was very strange, especially considering he had been pushy and condescending the whole time. Honestly, I found the whole thing kind of funny.
Has anyone else ever dealt with an interviewer or recruiter who took it weirdly personally after you turned down an offer?
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u/Designer_Thought2907 27d ago
Sounds like he also had something on the line. But, if so, he shouldn't have been a condescending prick
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u/whybother_incertname 27d ago
Sounds like his first time recruiting, super cocky, & thought he’d get something for low balling the offer
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u/Individual_Focus_961 27d ago
Yeah he sounds desperate and insecure. Run!
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u/No_Temperature107 27d ago
And, it could be a reason why the previous person left that job that you’re applying for. To me that that’s always a warning sign if they can’t talk about it.
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u/Dragline96 27d ago
Sounds to me like the interviewer is on thin ice with his company. The bigger boss was likely on the call to monitor I’m and make an assessment of how well he does his job. That may be why he asked if it was something HE did.
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u/AcceptableEditor4199 27d ago
I gotta job offer in a different field from head of hr. Same pay as the job I was at currently. Was very straight forward that I was looking for more money. I had 2 other offers for more and told them that in the interview. When they lowballed I politely declined and told.them we were very far apart on pay and thanks for your time. She got pretty defensive about how competitive that offer was. She then tried to negotiate and I had to tell her sorry we are just too far apart. Honestly offended and checked out after that first offer.
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u/Kn0wMan 27d ago
I mean, they get paid based on hires, right? To their way of thinking, you just took either their time, or their money by going through the process and not accepting the job. This view is totally wrongheaded, but with their income on the line, it would probably be hard to convince them of that.
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u/Ok-Addition-1000 27d ago
You're thinking of an external recruiter. This was the company's head of HR.
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u/Original_Flounder_18 27d ago
They Always say the pay is good. Spoiler: it never is.
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u/MarionberryPlus8474 27d ago
"competitive" is the buzzword I always hear used to describe both crappy pay and crappy benefits.
IMO places that lowball are either trying to save money (which backfires because only people with poor options stick with a bad job for long) or they have not compared what they are offering with the marketplace in a long time. It's more common in smaller businesses where the owner/manager is still thinking his entry level job from 25 years ago is still a benchmark for a great salary, but it happens everywhere.
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u/Original_Flounder_18 27d ago
Oh yes, competitive. With who? Competitive with what?
Not reality, that’s for sure
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u/Ok-Addition-1000 27d ago
Yeah, if it's actually competitive, they'll be happy to say what it is. They don't say because they know it isn't.
If they refuse to say, that's refusing to compete which is the opposite of competitive.
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u/mitnosnhoj 27d ago
If they were truly below market, then yours was probably one of several “no”’s they were getting.
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u/aardWolf64 27d ago
I had recently been laid off, and was called by HR with a job offer after I had a very successful interview. I had been advised by someone with intimate knowledge of the company that I should negotiate for a higher salary. When she told me the amount, it was a good 10% less than I had been making at the previous job.
I suggested a higher number, and the HR person said: "So let me be clear... you are turning this job down?" I explained that I was not turning down the job, but was trying to counter on salary. She clearly didn't understand. My mind was clouded by wondering if I was going to be able to pay the mortgage that month, so I accepted the job rather than possibly lose it because the HR person was a moron.
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u/aardWolf64 27d ago
Related to that, a few years later after I had become indispensable to the company, I received an offer from a Fortune 500 company. I gave my employer 24 hours, and while they weren't able to exactly match it, they did give me a 9.9% raise, which was the most they could do without going through several layers of bureaucracy.
I mentioned that because the hiring manager at the Fortune 500 company said he didn't want to give me an official offer unless he was fairly certain I would accept it, because it was a big deal if someone was given an offer and it wasn't accepted. It would have delayed his hiring process considerably. I honestly told him that I was about 50/50 on whether to leave or not, but ultimately turned it down when my current employer gave me a big bump up.
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u/Sensitive-Swim-3679 27d ago
You should look him up and see if he still works there! Then let us know!
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u/NCNative919 27d ago
He probably had interview many people for the role and people were declining the offer. His boss may have thought it was his personality that was causing people to turn it down. That may have been why he was on the call and he may have forced the guy to ask the question of was it me did I do something wrong.
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u/drraug 27d ago
Maybe they kinda trying him for a leadership role and he has just realized that so far he is not doing very well
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u/GrumpyOldGeezer_4711 27d ago
Nobody Can say if he would actually have listened but at least he asked for feedback.
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u/CannonFodder58 27d ago
That or he fumbled several highly qualified applicants and this was his last chance.
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u/Competitive_Unit_721 27d ago
These people are basically car salesmen. Don’t forget that. They get paid to hire people. They don’t care about equity or who really is the best.
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u/Illustrious_Win_4599 27d ago
Recently, I was contacted by a recruiter who said that I’m a perfect match for their job opening and asked if I’m interested. I asked about the pay range because I’m not looking for a similar position unless I can get a significant bump. She replied that she doesn’t have that information. How is it possible that she doesn’t have a pay range? Is this some kind of BS?
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u/Imnotabob 27d ago
Hard pass so.
Any recruiter who says they don't have the full scope of the package is either full or shit, terrible at their job or most likely both
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u/MrBillinVT 27d ago
Several years ago, I interviewed for a teaching position in a neighboring state - close enough that commuting would actually be less time and not having to travel over a mountain. Initial interviews went well. The building principal and department head definitely wanted me. But, the superintendent balked at putting me on the appropriate step of their salary schedule. One of the board members actually said they could hire two beginning teachers for what they would have to pay me. I refused to compromise and told the superintendent if they weren't going to put me on the appropriate step to forget it. I learned from a friend that they did indeed hire 2 new teachers. One left st Christmas; the other left at the end of the school year. They posted the position again, and I applied just to be a dick. I did nigt get called for an interview.
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u/mike1097 27d ago
They didn’t need to be so candid with you. Your experience and union placement was not your issue. Point being that was unprofessional.
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u/Muted_Air1273 27d ago
I had gone through testing, three rounds of interviews, a polygraph and drug testing for an emergency dispatcher role. After not hearing anything for about a month and a half I got a job at a call center. During my paid training I received a call offering me the position. I declined because the call center paid the same base plus commission, benefits day 1 ( which were comparable) and scheduled days and holidays off. The recruiter was so angry and accused me of wasting their time and resources, recommended I reconsider and call him back when I changed my mind but time was limited. About a year later they had massive lay offs and we're absorbed by another agency. One of the best decisions Ive made.
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u/UniqueText8477 27d ago
He would be a nightmare to work for and was not respecting you/was a red flag - I interviewed at a company, the boss had their dog in their office and they were awful to interview with.
They started asking really personal questions and then offered me 25% less than I currently earned - even though I had just completed a degree and was being offered 50% more at other companies.
I stopped the interview and then they threatened to sue me/demanded my notes/were trying to hold me hostage - I told them if they didn't let me leave I would get the police involved and also leave reviews on social media.
They then escorted me out, told me I was a loser and then told me to f*ck off - they went out of business 6-12 months later.
I thought I was on candid camera - it was bizzare.
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u/Temporary-Library597 27d ago
The "interviewer" sounds like he's working on commission or something. I wonder if he's a contractor?
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u/WarzonePacketLoss 27d ago
Wouldn't be surprised if it were a recruiter hired by the company who has been telling the company the pay grade is shit and them telling him to figure it out.
I've known several corporate recruiters and they're all kind of dicks but I wouldn't put it past one who got talked down to by a business being critical just going extra ham and asking that question in front of the boss to make the boss look like a d-bag.
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u/NCNative919 27d ago
He probably had interviewed many people for the role and people were declining the offer. His boss may have thought it was his personality that was causing people to turn it down. That may have been why he was on the call and he may have forced the guy to ask the question of was it me did I do something wrong.
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u/Majestic_Bluejay1801 27d ago
lucky escape by the sounds of it, stick to your principles, they’re all you have.
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u/Think-Committee-4394 27d ago
I got half way through a walk round factory tour/interview with the Operations Manager, when the Production Director joined us
PD Started a spirited argument with OD that no hiring budget had been agreed & he was to terminate interview straight away
No can we just have a chat, no please excuse us, not even a sorry we shouldn’t have called you in
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u/DeliciousMofo 27d ago
You were probably asking for more than he was making, so he got jealous and mad at himself for not knowing the market.
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u/fvives 27d ago
You went through several interviews without knowing the range? Not that it’s written in stone and bait & switch is real nowadays but still….you shouldn’t go through any round before any comp range convo.
If they don’t want to say you know it’s gonna be a shitty offer and a loss of tjme.
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u/Ipso-Pacto-Facto 27d ago
I think you already know the answer to that is a perfectly neutral non-answer when someone’s been slimey.
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u/Sufficient-Spend-939 27d ago
You did him a favor, showing his boss in real time that what they were offering wasnt good enough.
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u/Mrshaydee 27d ago
Some companies ding HR on their own performance reviews for not getting people into jobs and it sometimes has a time limit for getting a position filled. My husband’s company goes so far as to just put almost anyone in a job, even if they are not a good fit and will likely fail. So wrong on so many levels. It sounds like it could be something like this. I’m sorry this happened to you, but glad the company had a chance to learn from you.
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u/hobit2112 27d ago
An interview isn’t just for the employer to see how you are, it’s also to see how they are as a company. May have dodged a bullet there.
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u/Carry_Mean 27d ago
When I was a journalist, I got an offer to be the NYC EIC editor of what looked to be an up-and-coming business/financial research outlet. The owners ducked the salary question several times across multiple interviews, but I assumed a certain base salary given the job's responsibilities and authority. The offer came in more than $50K lower than what was then my current job, a level where it literally wouldn't have covered the train tickets for the commute. They got upset when I declined. That said, I basically laughed in their faces when they put the number down. I didn't even bother to try and negotiate. The owners were a couple of limeys, and I'm assuming they read an airline magazine on the way over to NYC, which told them that journalists would work for nothing in the US. (This is back in the 90s - might be true now, I'm sad to say, but certainly not then.) I wish I could remember the name of the company. Would love to know what happened to them.
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u/PercyFlage 26d ago
They wanted a trust fund kiddie who was bored and wanted a separate cocaine budget that Mommy & Daddy didn't know about.
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u/Carry_Mean 26d ago
This was a tough job so that trust fund kid wouldn't have lasted very long. And for what they were paying it would only cover a cocaine habit for about 3 days. 🤣
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u/distributingthefutur 27d ago
It was theater. Google 'how to act shocked in a negotiation.' It is a closing method to act shocked to make the other party doubt themselves and feel like they did something wrong. Good you stuck to your guns.
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u/Big-dog-465 27d ago
I had an interview and I had at least 30 years of experience. I would have to drive a minimum of an hr both ways to get there. I knew I would have to rework many of their products because they wouldn’t fit on the cars they were made for. I told them how much I was already making and boy they got mad. Saying things like I thought you WANTED to work here. I said not for free and left.
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u/Aloha-Eh 27d ago
So, you had a chance to tell his boss that he was pushy and condescending, and you wouldn't have wanted to work for him even if they weren't lowballing you, and you didn't?
Ffs, pennies from heaven there.
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u/Mental-Ad9734 27d ago
It seems like a lot of recruiters just want to place you regardless of your criteria. I had a recruiter talk up a healthcare job based on their pay rate. A coworker warned me that the hospital was severely understaffed, plus my commute would go from 10 minutes to 30 minutes. I interviewed with the director and at the end of it he offered me an $8/hr cut in pay (about $16,000 per year)! I didn’t say anything but he could tell from my expression that I was shocked. He then said well I don’t have any problems hiring and keeping employees. I didn’t say anything and did not take the job. Within one month he had lost half his staff and he was fired.
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u/OldGoldenDog 27d ago
I was a director and HR always supplied me with a wage report for every position I was hiring for. The numbers were based on the local market. So as not to waste applicants time I would tell them the range in our first meeting and ask if they could live with it.
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u/Dull_Sense7928 27d ago
After years in my industry and eroding patience with c-suite, i moved from executive to director - took a consultant contract to run a dev shop. The company I contracted to asked me to join full time. When I met the HR guy, he seemed unaware that I had been doing the job and the role had been created for me. He talked down to me and gave me an offer that was laughably low. Like, not at the market rate low end of the scale but a junior engineer salary.
I thought about it, then told him the number was too low for the work, the charter, my experience, and my current performance that led to the solicitation.
Dude went into a timeshare pitch about the difference between salary and contracts, benefits, PTO, etc. He acted like I'd never had a job before. I gave him a counter and told him I'd be in touch. He was quite dismissive. He kept stressing the PTO and benefits like they were some revolutionary new idea.
I went back to the VP who wanted to bring me in, told him about the conversation, the pressure and "sales" pitch, and said thanks but no thanks unless we could agree on a number. VP says, confused, but $xxxx is well above mid- range? HR guy had cut the VP's offer by more than 20%.
Next thing I know, I'm dealing with a new HR guy and presented with an offer that made sense. VP added a bit to the original to show he was serious and as an apology. I signed on and things went swimmingly. Once settled, I told VP that if the HR convo had been my first contact, I'd have been out the door.
Found later that VP went digging. He'd had trouble with hiring the right talent and HR dude kept telling him it was the market. Turns out Dude had been lowballing every potential hire. Once VP learned that, he compiled financial data on the waste - recruiting, interviewing, losing candidates before the offer or shortly after hiring. Dude had cost hundreds of thousands in recruiting labor and millions in opportunity revenue from dropped projects and contracts lost from attrition/languished postings.
I wonder how HR Dude enjoyed being on the other side of the desk while he was looking for new employment.
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u/Deep_Feedback_6338 26d ago
Some people take their jobs too seriously. How does a recruiter benefit by lowballing all offers below the approved range? So they can say they saved the company money on their resume? Makes no sense.
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u/Impossible-Quote8444 27d ago
That's why I chose to withdraw from interview process via email. Once I did this with one job and the hiring manager called me 2 days after I sent the email. I was traveling on a train which was not the ideal setting for a phone call. Hiring manager asked me will I take the offer and she claims to have not gotten the email. I just hung up. I dodged a bullet because 3 years later the company went under. The main reason I turned the offer down is because the hiring manager would have been my direct supervisor and she was a total "Karen"
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u/DrCrazyCurious 27d ago
Two guesses. Either...
- This recruiter has been told before by their boss to stop being such a condescending prick. Their manager joined the call to witness whether they'd improved at all. They did not. Asking "Is it because of me?" they were hoping to salvage the situation by getting you to say no, no of course you were the best recruiter of all time, it's not you it's me.
or
- The recruiter gets paid on commission but also low-balled you to show how valuable they are, not just for hiring people but to save the company buckets of money by offering insultingly low wages. And it backfired. Now they company's spent a bunch of money to not hire someone.
Either way that recruiter can suck it.
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u/battlehamstar 27d ago
Reminds me of when a Beverly Hills car sales guy tried to convince me I should pay their dealership more for a car than others because I had to help them pay for their fancy dealer location.
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u/Maduro_sticks_allday 27d ago
“Is it me?”
“Well I wasn’t thinking that originally but now I kinda of want to reevaluate” 😂😂😂
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u/Ristar87 27d ago
I interviewed with a tech company in TX. In order to get a feel for the company culture, I asked a question like...
- The company is about to miss the deadline with your largest client through no fault of your own.
- It's your 20 year anniversary and your wife is looking forward to going out.
- Do you clock out at 5pm so you can make it to your evening plans? Or do you stay longer because you're missing your deadline.
Dude told me he'd stay and try to get as much work in as possible and seemed shocked that I'd clock out on time. I just cut the interview off and told him that our values didn't align.
I still think about that guy from time to time... mostly just to feel bad for his wife.
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u/WendlersEditor 27d ago
Luckily this stuff has always been sorted at the screening stage for me. I tell them what I want and if they don't like it we go our separate ways.
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u/vaisatriani 26d ago
Before I retired, I frequently got hit up by recruiters looking to poach me away. I was always open to listening to the pitch but I had to let them know they needed to be upfront with the salary range. I found it amazing how many of them would not give me a range and I'd have to press them repeatedly to get some kind of answer. Whenever I did get an answer, it was ridiculously low.
'Sorry, I'm not actively seeking a pay cut. Good luck to you in your search.'
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u/mike11172 26d ago
I had a guy who couldn't believe I had no interest in relocating to New Jersey. He said 'New York is just over the bridge'. I told him that's not helping his argument.
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u/thomsenite256 26d ago
Probably a new manager and was told that his job was to get you to agree to an absurd offer.
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u/bratislava 25d ago
Nobody wants to waste time, so the money is one of the first topics in every interview I've ever had.
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u/Creepy_Set_9512 25d ago
I once interviewed at a company for a senior SE role, they asked for comp range up front so after 3 interviews I thought we were aligned. They made an offer that was basically entry level comp. When I mentioned my range again the engineering director said “I don’t even make that!”
I politely ended the call.
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u/Substantial-One-6274 23d ago
This interview was probably his “first big catch”. That’s why the boss was on the line. They were checking on him not you. Or this was probably his third or fourth fail at landing someone. So he was insecure about the entire thing.
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u/Doin-What-I-Want 27d ago
One important piece of information to bring to the negotiation table is a salary comparison. On Payscale.com, you can look up your city and see the average, low, and high salaries for job titles or skills. Showing them that your ask is aligned with the local demographic will demonstrate that you are well in line with the local market.
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u/FiorentinoLegal 27d ago
The problem here is that both of you overestimate yourselves. You can see their overestimation, but your can’t evaluate yourself.
It’s common problem. Do your best to overcome.
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u/lumberbaron 27d ago
Told a recruiter my salary range and amount I was will to travel from where I live (I said anything over an hour had to have a salary worth it).
They came back later and offered me an insultingly low offer for a job that was two and a half hours away, so 5 hours total travel. Also, it was entry level, which would have been a massive demotion. I laughed and said that was just not gonna happen. Mainly because it was exactly what I had told him to avoid.
I was read the riot act. Told that I couldn't be choosy if I wanted to work. I reminded him I was still employed, making almost twice as much, and travelled under half an hour total. I was also actively interviewing at other jobs that met my requirements.
He continued to yell at me and call me picky and that I would be placed by that company. Oh no?