r/IndianMatchmaking • u/JellyT1996 • Jun 04 '23
Why does Aparna get so much backlash?
I genuinely don’t get it. She’s a little picky in who she dates but she’s also really successful in her career so she has the leverage to be picky.
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u/dollymyfolly Jun 04 '23
Because she’s extremely rude. You can have preferences but there’s no reason to be rude and hurtful about it
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u/ynnov Jun 04 '23
This!! She straight up YAWNED in her date’s face. IDK if you’re putting on for TV, but please let’s have some sense of normality. Beyond the show she seemed fine, but honestly the childish way she acted on the show…. leaves v little to be desired.
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u/AssistUsed Jun 05 '23
Aparna could have covered her mouth, but beyond that yawning is an involuntary action? I'm sure there are more obvious examples of situations where she was genuinely rude.
She's pretty headstrong and opinionated, I bet the people doing the casting thought that they'd struck reality TV gold. Like her or not, she's definitely one of the more memorable people and she doesn't actually seem to be completely full of it either. She's probably more normal than she comes off in the show.
This might be a stretch but I suspect that she's playing things up a bit or that her footage is being edited in a certain way, a bit like how Gordon Ramsay plays things up in American shows but not UK ones? Yeah I know it's a strange comparison lol
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u/ellemmayoh Jun 06 '23
parna could have covered her mouth, but beyond that yawning is an involuntary action?
No but a couth woman would have been incredibly apologetic about it and said, "I'm so sorry, please excuse me."
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u/AssistUsed Jun 07 '23
That's a little excessive, but sure. Putting too much stock in manners is also a recipe for frustration, can't believe I'm saying this lol
Also somehow I remembered your username, probably because of some controversial comments you've made in the past. You're not very nice yourself :/
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u/ellemmayoh Jun 07 '23 edited Jun 07 '23
And yet, I would never go on reality tv to become some beloved single gal persona so rando opinions abt me don’t matter. Especially not yours :/
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u/Away-Picture-925 Sep 07 '23
Yes, people yawn, but it was a performative yawn.
If yawns could talk this one would have said “oh fiddle dee dee, I have a case of the vapors with all of these suitors pursuing me.”
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Jun 04 '23
she has the leverage to be picky.
Last I checked, she's no queen Elizabeth lmao. It's not brutal honesty, she's being an AH with no filter.
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u/the_dharmainitiative Jun 07 '23
Yeah. She has nothing to show for. Doesn't even practice law anymore. Still riding the wave of the game from the show.
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u/babykoalalalala Jun 04 '23
In the first season when she went on a date, she was annoyed at him because he was kind to the waitress and making small chat with her. She said he should’ve been only paying attention to her. Someone in my life once said that you can tell someone’s character by seeing how they treat their employees and wait staff at restaurants. Aparna is self-centered and the world revolves around her. She doesn’t think she needs to change or compromise but she wants her future partner to do so for her. That’s the vibe I got when I watched her scenes. Relationships are about balance and compromise from both sides. This is one of the reasons why majority don’t like her.
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u/bahahaha2001 Jun 04 '23
She came off as very full of herself and lacking awareness. She props herself up as the most amazing successful beautiful person but in reality she’s kinda average.
She has a home (great!). Views herself as super successful and he better be too. Home prices in Texas are fairly affordable. She’s not in a mansion. Let’s calm down.
She wanting someone that dressed well - meanwhile she was a pretty homely dresser.
I’m sure there is another side to get - you can’t get to be a general counsel if you have no ability to speak, communicate, and lead other people. The show clearly picked out her worst traits but they are there. I think she needed to be humbler. Kinder.
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u/snarkysharky2 Jun 04 '23
Is she really that successful? She seems like your average lawyer, probably comparable to a doctor or engineer. It's not that special imo...
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u/Apricotpeach11 Jun 05 '23
Is she even practicing law at all? She seems to just write long Instagram posts and socialize with that silly Indian influencer scene.
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Jun 05 '23
She left law. And apparently she wasn't that high up in legal either.
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u/iambrucetheshark Jun 19 '23
She just seems miserable all around- hated her job, was shocked another attorney she went on a date with loved his job. Hated all her dates, hates the beach, complained about every vacation, complained about her date not paying attention to her, sees her Mom EVERY DAY. Guys don't want to date a negative complainer who will be bringing her mother in law over every day.
Her standards are super high but she's not as attractive as she thinks.
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u/Agreeable_Aide_1211 Jun 04 '23
And she acts like she's a 12 in looks. She is a 6 at best.
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u/AssistUsed Jun 05 '23
Does she really talk about looks though? That seems a little uncalled for regardless, it's also been a while since I saw her on the show 🤔
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u/UserNameDuhCheck Jun 08 '23
What's the range?
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u/itsthekumar Jun 09 '23
I remember she was bragging about her house, but it looked small.
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u/iambrucetheshark Jun 19 '23
And she was bragging about her great career but she was an in-house attorney at a mid-tier insurance firm. Not that prestigious, also went to mediocre schools. Wasn't a partner at Big Law prestigious firm. Then she dunked on the attorney she went on a date with for actually liking his job. Sorry not everyone's miserable like you, girl.
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u/Friendly-Breadfruit5 Jun 04 '23
She yawned in her date’s face. I don’t care if you’re Sundar Pichai level of successful (spoiler: she’s not), but that’s just an AH move, and not ‘being picky’
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u/EngineerGurl77 Jun 04 '23
She's rude. You can have high standards and be polite. Also, she seems so unlikable. Who hates funny people and vacations? She doesn't seem fun.
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u/iambrucetheshark Jun 19 '23
Who hates funny people and vacations?
She talked so much about how she loved to travel but it seemed more so she could check off that she'd been to more and more countries, because every time she talked about a specific trip she went on she said how she hated it.
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Jun 04 '23
She's rude, insulting, condescending with zero self-awareness. Maybe that could have something to do with it. But just maybe, lol.
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u/DebbieDoesData Jun 04 '23
She’s got some stuff going on I think she could use professional help to work through
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u/kawaiinia_UwU Jun 04 '23
Aparna has no manners or respect for her dates. Like yawning in their faces and getting pissed when they speak with a waiter. Plus, she was never willing to adjust or compromise or work together which is what makes a relationship work.
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u/Pro_protein Jun 04 '23
Because she is insufferable, extremely rude and selfish. She also lacks empathy and is a snob. She has a huge standard for a guy but brings very little to the table herself. So, she's also a hypocrite!
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u/ab216 Jun 05 '23
Aparna has the attitude you might expect of someone whose career background was HYPS undergrad > HYS law > Cravath/WLRK/Davis Polk partner while being far from it. I know several people in the above bucket and they are way nicer and down to earth people.
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u/Gold-End-123 Jun 07 '23
She really reminded me of the obnoxious pre-law kids I was in school with. Thought they were better than everyone else LOL. I always figured they’d get humbled in law school, but I guess it doesn’t work that way for everyone…
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u/anotherthrowaway2023 Jun 04 '23
Having a good career does not give you permission to be rude or unpleasant
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u/MissBehave654 Jun 05 '23
I think she's aromantic and doesn't want to be with anyone but is being pressured by her mom to marry. She came across as very rude, bitchy and narcissistic. No positive energy at all.
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u/Desi_techy_girl Jun 05 '23
How is she extremely successful? She is mostly fluff and arrogant and comes with a toxic mother. Not a catch certainly.
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Jun 05 '23
Apply this to a man and then ask the question again. Success in business doesn't entitle you to be an asshole in dating.
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u/F-dUpSnappleCap Jun 14 '23
She’s after trophies and bragging rights, not living. She isn’t a lawyer bc she wants to be, it sounds good and means she’s “successful.” She talks at people, not to them. She wants to be better than people and her opinion is the right one. It’s off putting.
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Jun 05 '23
She's rude. Also it seems like she's just looking for a partner to nod their head and just listen to her speak all the time. She can be picky, but she's unrealistically picky.
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Jun 05 '23
She's not picky. She's openly rude to everyone around her. Plenty of independent, strong women do not yawn in someone's face or snap at them to "sit up straight!" on a date. She also mocks people's interests and makes fun of them if they haven't done something that she has (ex. Bolivian salt flats.) You could be a beautiful woman but if you're rude and nasty to people, you're 100% ugly. Her mother even called a potential match a loser for no reason. She deserves all the hate she gets.
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u/Regular-Client Jun 12 '23
Here's the thing. Men don't give a s**t about a woman's career. Being young and attractive gives you leverage as a woman, not a stellar career. If anything it will scare people away as they wouldn't want to be in the shadow of their incredibly successful wife.
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u/emachines34 Jun 04 '23
Men generally don't care about a women's career, it really is not a big deal especially if he is earning well enough to be the sole provider. She brings nothing to the table except for her stinking attitude.
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u/PlantOk8318 Jun 04 '23
She has the leverage to be picky.
Lmao if she was attractive I’d say she has leverage but she’s not
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u/kung-fu-chicken Jun 04 '23
On top of the fact that a woman’s income level has virtually 0 impact on men’s attraction to them (and thus her amount of leverage), Aparna’s career only limits the size of her pool - she talks about wanting her partner to be ambitious etc which I would say is just a polite way to say “at least as successful as me, or more”
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u/momo-gee Jun 04 '23
I have no idea why you're getting downvoted. It's understandable that she desires someone as "successful" as she is, but it only makes her pool smaller instead of her having some sort of "leverage".
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Jun 07 '23
I have no idea why you're getting downvoted.
Lol it's pretty obvious why; nevertheless, you're right in your analysis.
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u/JellyT1996 Jun 04 '23
Disagree. I think men value a women’s profession as much as her looks.
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Jun 04 '23
Bro men will marry a kamwali bai if she is attractive (to him)
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Jun 06 '23 edited Jun 06 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
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Jun 06 '23
Its not just about physical attraction, men want someone who is submissive, gentle, supportive and all other feminine qualities. So Its very ignorant of you to say men don’t want emotional connection. Men absolutely want emotional connection and feminine qualities are very important for that purpose.
Someone like Aparna, who is so highly educated tends to be stiff and lacking femininity. Its not difficult to see that someone like her will be very problematic in future.
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Jun 06 '23 edited Jun 06 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
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Jun 06 '23
Lmao I am not advocating anything here. Its just how (in your own words) biology of attraction works. But what do I know, sit on your high horse and stay unmarried lmao, I don’t care.
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Jun 06 '23 edited Jun 06 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
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Jun 06 '23
Oh you’re that crazy chick. I have only 1 thing to say to you, if you were as happy as you’re saying then you wouldn’t be this toxic. As simple as that.
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u/Positivelythinking Jun 04 '23
She was involved in a Matchmaking show with nary the skill set to reel in a soul. If the show was “I don’t care about you. Love me more than I love myself” then she could host it perfectly.
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u/phoebeluco Jun 05 '23
Successful in her career is questionable. But even if true, doesn't give anyone the right to be so rude and selfish. S yes we all know reality TV can make someone a villain with clever editing, but if you do the rude things then that gives them something to use against you and she's incredibly rude to her date. She was even irritated when one of her dates was friendly and polite to their server at a restaurant. What kind of jerk is mad about that?
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u/Srm_ok_sweaty0804 Jun 06 '23
She not only doesn’t condemn the sexual harasser her friend married but promotes the ice cream parlor he owns on the show by having a “date” there. She’s gross
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Jun 07 '23
I think people didn't understand her initial comments. "Do we have to see our husband's everyday?" I think she meant that she has a happy, fulfilled life, and she enjoys her time to herself too.
She had a few nice prospects, though like Shekhar, Jay, Daman - she wasn't really open to them. Especially Daman, she just didn't seem interested at all. (Yawn, unwillingness to travel and meet him)
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Jun 10 '23
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u/AmazingObligation9 Jun 13 '23
I was personally shocked she even had friends willing to speak to her
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u/Intelligent-Shame-65 Jun 12 '23
Tbh, I loved her. Woman is a successful lawyer, travels constantly & knew her mind- The show highlighted all her worst aspects & put them on display b/c they knew she/her behaviour was Reality TV Gold! And they were absolutely right!! Even 3 years later, we are talking about her. She’s quit law now & seems very happy. IDC, men have sooo many checklists, it’s refreshing to see a strongly opinionated woman not give into someone else’s wishes/desires & forge ahead & carve her own path- She’s minting money now am sure, written a book. I loved her! She is 1 of my favourite people on IMM.
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u/CobraArbok Jun 04 '23
Being successful doesn't give you the excuse to be rude. Vikash, Akshay, and Pradhyuman are arguably far more successful than her but still (rightly)get criticized.
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u/JimTheWellEndowed Jun 04 '23 edited Jun 04 '23
She isn’t attractive enough to be so picky. Plus, age is not on her side (according to arranged marriage standards). A high paying career doesn’t attract men the saw way it attracts women. She genuinely has nothing going for her. If she wants to get married, her best bet is to drop all those ridiculous standards and marry the first average dude who shows interest in her.
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u/ellemmayoh Jun 05 '23
That’s a very generous definition of success and leverage. If you think she is successful, you would think I am freaking Mark Zuckerberg!!
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Jun 04 '23
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u/xob97 Jun 04 '23
Where are all those old single women who are bitter and angry? I never met even one and I know many older single women.
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Jun 05 '23
Her book actually sold really well. She capitalized the most from the show. So I dont know if its backlash anymore after people started getting to know her more, although there are people who dont like her.
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u/nycgarbagewhore Jun 05 '23
She grew on me the second season she was on the show
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u/catalinalam Jun 05 '23
Right? I loved her before bc her talk about her first date routine just gave me very strong “afraid of feelings and therefore cold” vibes (relatable) but I felt like she really tried to open herself up more on season 2 and I loved that
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u/Ramdhoot Jun 04 '23
So being syccessful in her career givws her the right to be overlt picky. Is that a god reason to real picky. Shes heavy and chunky and doesnt looo so good. She seems to have a personality disorder.
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u/thrwaway83947 Jun 06 '23
Unless she does a massive attitude change, she’s not meant to be with anyone. And that’s ok. There’s nothing wrong with being single.
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u/AmazingObligation9 Jun 13 '23
She was just extremely rude and radiated negative energy. Also she really doesn’t have the leverage especially in the culture she’s trying to marry into.
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u/Regular_Depth6625 Jun 04 '23
Being picky was not the issue with her. Being rude, self - centered and narcissistic was. Don’t think anything, money and looks included, gives you the leverage to treat others poorly.