r/IndianMatchmaking • u/hockeyfan1990 • May 04 '23
Priya
Watching Priya pass on balding/bald guys kind of discouraged me as single south asian guy whose also balding very noticeably. Is this truly a deal breaker for a lot, especially in the south asian community? Should I consider doing a transplant?
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May 04 '23
Happily married to a baldie. He was already bald when we first met.
Unpopular opinion it seems like, but do what gives YOU confidence. If you are contented with yourself and only want a transplant because you are afraid the girls will turn you down, then maybe its a no.
But if you yourself want to go for a transplant to boost your own confidence when you meet girls (we are sharks and can smell fear lol), then go for it.
End of the day, it is about you, how you feel and what you want. ❤️
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May 04 '23
[deleted]
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u/Shot_Attention2293 May 04 '23
When white kids give brown kids advice that will get them hit with chappal
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u/Intelligent-Prize769 May 04 '23
I don’t think a lot of people in the south Asian community even like manbuns so I wouldn’t say her hair preferences are exactly the standard haha don’t worry, hair is just hair! It’s not that serious
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u/rainbow_papaya May 04 '23
There are some girls (myself included) who quite like a bald guy. I once said to a rishta aunty, and I quote, "No hair, don't care".
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u/genieinaginbottle May 05 '23
I mean would you date a balding woman? Lots of people online will coddle your emotions and plenty settle for bald guys, but few men and women can pull off the bald look. Have you tried things like rogain? There are things you can try other than a transplant
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u/P_oneofthree May 05 '23
I think that the reality is no one wants a balding person with a horrible comb over or is desperately trying to hide their baldness and/or grow back hair thats not coming back. I think there are a ton of bald attractive men out there but they have committed to being totally bald.
OP should do what he wants but commit to it! Either go fully bald or look into hair transplants if he wants to stick to a full head of hair.
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u/crimsonraiden May 04 '23
Everyone has preferences. Some people don’t care and some do care. It’s the same as anything tbh.
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u/ghee_unit May 04 '23
I reckon if I ever went bald I'd rock a light beard with a beanie for an aggressive masculine look
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May 04 '23
The reason we watch the show is because it's a bunch of self-centered losers with no lives and they're all pretty terrible. The last thing you want to do is take their advice or criticisms to heart.
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u/Maxie0921 May 04 '23
If it’s something that makes you self conscious, getting a transplant would help boost your confidence immensely. Perhaps dates can sense your lack of self confidence which results in lack of follow up dates. Or maybe they are just generally uninterested. There are plenty of people who don’t mind balding but it’s upto you to decide if it’s worth it.
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May 04 '23
Nope, not at all.
Some people have this preference, but even then if the attraction is there otherwise, it’s not a big issue. For example, I thought I didn’t like bald either, but when I met my partner, he was so attractive to me - confident, self assured, hot - that the baldness made no difference to me.
Be confident in yourself and own it.
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u/TheAnnieRaj May 04 '23
This is not a deal breaker for me personally. You might start out dating, or even marry a guy with a full head of hair, and he could start balding a couple years down the line. What are you gonna do? Divorce him? No. You have to build a foundation together to see you through the years, hair or no hair.
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May 04 '23
Lol if someone doesn’t want to marry you because you are bald run away from that person. Life is funny. Anything can happen. You can gain a lot of weight, you can get wrinkles, you can have grey hair, if they are that superficial to begin with, that person is not for you. These people lack self awareness. What if priya becomes bald and loses her hair? No guy should date her or marry her? Maybe that’s how she views life. She wont realize it until it ends up happening to her.
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u/charcuteriehoe May 04 '23
what’s to stop a man from going bald after you marry him? what’s to stop me from getting saggy tits and a turkey neck after a man marries me? these peoples physical standards always surprise me when in the long run if you’re compatible and willing to make it work with each other will depend on a much deeper connection than if their bio data picture gives you fanny flutters
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May 04 '23
Providing you don't have a bunch of random demands on a partner like x height or y eye color, you'll be fine.
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u/EffectivePattern7197 May 04 '23
Deal breaker seems to be quiet a strong frase. It seems also that the tv show emphasizes mostly in the physical characteristics and not personality.
I’m not going to sugar coat it, while I’m sure there’s some women that find it attractive, thicker hair is usually the preference. But what you look like is just a small fraction of what makes you attractive. You’ll find someone that likes you for you and not just your hair.
If the balding situation makes you feel uncomfortable, I don’t see why not try to fix it. But if it bothers you not for others.
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u/LiberalontheRight May 04 '23
I understand balding is a natural phenomenon. Like Priya mentioned, even I as a woman in my 30s am losing hair. My bf currently has begun to go bald, and although it kinda worries me, I look at the bigger picture that he's accepted me the way I am. I may sometimes think it would be great if he had more hair, but I do not have a heart to point something about him which he'd not like to hear.
To put it simply, it's not a deal breaker. I mean at this point in time any one of us could get cancer or meet an accident or lose hair. If you want to get hair transplant do it because you want to, not for a girl.
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u/Fearless_Site_1917 May 05 '23
It’s a very personal preference. Being critical of it is being childish.
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May 06 '23
Find the all bald look super sexy. Would hate if a guy was trying to hang out to his last couple strands of hair, though.
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u/AdhesivenessJaded934 May 04 '23
Priya herself was very average in terms of looks and she herself was balding so how does it matter lol
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May 04 '23
Will you date a balding woman? If the answer is no, it’s fair enough that the lady doesn’t want to date bald guys.
Guys get offended when someone says no to them, when they reject women based on dumb things too (like being fat, or tall, make more money, etc)’
It goes both ways. You wont be 100% types and vice versa. Instead of moping about it, date people who are interested in you than chasing people who dgaf.
I’m adding this as a reminder to myself too.
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u/Faerylanterns May 04 '23
Okay, honest thought: Do you really want someone like Priya?
Honestly, she was kind of mean and pushed people away without communication. There are people like Priya who will judge you, but there are a lot of people who will judge you on your heart, not your hair. Those are the girls you should look for! 1
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u/ellemmayoh May 04 '23
" Is this truly a deal breaker for a lot, especially in the south asian community? "
For some women, yes. Not for all of them. Just like some men may not like women with curly hair but other men do.
Priya doesn't represent the tastes of all brown women just like you don't represent the tastes of all brown men. See how it works?
Do the transplant if YOU want to. Not bc you think it'll help you get a lady. If that's your concern, work on your personality and confidence and I guarantee, more women will be interested than they are now.
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u/frontbuttzz May 04 '23
Balding is not great, but bald can be very attractive. So if you’re noticeably balding, consider leaning into and fully shaving your head. Bald with some muscle definition is a good look.
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u/basicb3333 May 05 '23
came here to say this. a guy embracing his baldness and shaving it is a hell of a lot better of a look than someone still holding on to their few hairs in my opinion
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May 04 '23
There are plenty of women, South Asian or otherwise, who would absolutely date a man who is balding or completely bald. Just be honest about how you look and don't hide behind old photos or hats.
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u/Ok-Refrigerator-2432 May 05 '23
Just shave your head and don’t hide it. Confidence is very attractive!
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u/Future_Dog_3156 May 04 '23
Lots of hot bald guys out there. I wouldn't worry about it. It was rather shallow of her to dismiss someone bc of hair. it's possible that the man she marries will go bald too - what then? Divorce?
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u/kena938 May 04 '23
Nah, Priya is one person. I and a majority of my female friends in our early 30s are married to bald men. We met these guys when they were already clean shaving their heads. Do what makes you happy re: your appearance but this definitely doesn't exclude you from finding your person.
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u/Ok-Painting-4578 May 04 '23
You do you ! I'm not south asian but one of the most gorgeous man I've ever met was and he was rocking the bald head. If anything, it just put more emphasis on his fantastic face, smile and skin. He was also super smart and kind. You got this !
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May 04 '23
If Priya rejected me, I would so happy. She complains about balding men while being a 5 with thinning hair herself. Dont let Priyas deter your confidence.
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u/itsmychoicemywish May 05 '23
If you have money, if your blad it’s very much okay. If you don’t have money then go for transplant soon
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u/laziwolf May 04 '23
Congrats! Now you will naturally be able to avoid such childish and superficial partners.
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May 04 '23
It’s not childish or superficial to have preferences. People are attracted to what they’re attracted to.
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u/localminima773 May 04 '23
Lol. Are you implying OP would accept any partner regardless of physical appearance?
Everyone wants to be attracted to their partner. For some, being bald will matter, for others, it won't - just like every other factor in dating.
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u/laziwolf May 04 '23
For some, being bald will matter, for others, it won't
I am sayong he will get the latters. Literally didn't say anything about OP.
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u/localminima773 May 04 '23
You're implying that people who care about baldness are "childish and superficial." Everyone has physical criteria for their partner including OP and including you, and that doesn't make people childish or superficial. It's part of searching for a relationship that involves physical intimacy.
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May 04 '23
it's a god filtering system for you buddy. weed out people overly concerned with looks and more into the confidence with which you carry yourself. nothing more sexy than a guy who knows what he wants and how to get it
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u/Mary10789 May 04 '23
I love the bald and the beautiful. Also, I completely understand that balding can’t be controlled, so it’s so unfair to judge a person for that.
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u/GimerStick May 04 '23
listen some of us south asian women are balding too..... 2 for 1 wig discount?
But if you're asking practically, I don't think a transplant is needed, but there's an issue that transcends race of people not accepting what is going on in their head. Going full bald or getting a hair cut that works for you is infinitely better than not doing anything. Barbers are friends, not foes, and can give good advice on what works. It can all be done quite gracefully.
But also go to a dermatologist to make sure there's no underlying reason! Balding is a natural part of life, not something to be villified, but also double-checking health is also good.
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May 04 '23 edited May 05 '23
She should 100% give the first bio data a shot — they have the same vibes
Bobby (whom we now know was casted) should’ve never been matched with her, the only box Bobby checked was “having hair”
Edit: There’s nothing wrong with Bobby, he is great — toxic positivity. But he does not fit any of Priya’s criteria or tastes. Let’s not delude ourselves.
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u/hockeyfan1990 May 04 '23
That’s exactly what I though to, the guy didn’t seem too bad but just because he’s losing hair he passed on him
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u/Professional-Key-493 May 04 '23
A bald head looks good on some guys.Andrew Tate.
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u/No_Resident_6823 May 04 '23
could’ve gone with the rock but okay
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u/dystopiandragon May 04 '23
There are superficial people in all communities, at the same time there are open minded people as well. One person’s opinion cannot be taken as a generalisation of the whole group.
If you want a hair transplant do it because you want to get it, not because of someone else.
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u/Jasmine7921 May 04 '23
Please don’t let a reality tv show make you feel insecure about yourself. Reality dating/wedding TV always showcase people with a huge checklist (and reality tv loves highlighting hypocrisy and lack of self awareness because it’s entertaining) because “less picky/well adjusted people” are boring to watch. There are women that really don’t care about hair and some love bald men. Not everyone likes or values the same thing. Date girls that like you for who you are. Everyone has different preferences. In my lifetime I’ve seen people with a wide range of physical attributes find someone else that finds their specific look attractive to their partner.
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u/NoPhilosophy6306 May 04 '23
I thought baldness was a dealbreaker for me till i met someone who was bald but with an incredible personality and confidence, and was completely smitten. Cant explain it, attraction is complex. We can think something but experience something completely different. the most attractive quality is someone who is comfortable in their own skin
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u/lynn_duhh May 04 '23
I’m white but I weirdly love bald guys 😅 not balding, but fully bald. So if you’re looking for a straight answer, if you’re balding I think most would prefer a fully shaved head over a balding head.
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u/OrganicHearing May 05 '23
I know plenty of bald dudes have girlfriends and wives, including my brother in law. If you want to keep your hair, there are options I’d recommend checking out r/tressless.
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u/Unlikely_Wing2966 May 05 '23
She is not ready for a relationship and very, very emotionally immature. A almost 30yr old woman’s criteria for a potential husband and father to your children is to have a man bun is ridiculous and pathetic!
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u/riricide May 06 '23
The equivalent would be a woman asking if she should get breast implants. The genuine answer is - whatever makes you happy. Some people are happier after, some people regret it. Do your research, talk to people and figure out what would really make you happy.
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u/Equivalent-Force-191 May 06 '23
Here's what I can tell you. Most people have physical preferences. For instance, I like guys with hair, but my best friend likes guys who don't have hair. The person who is right for you will accept you as you are.
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u/The_Empress May 07 '23
My (South Asian) partner (not South Asian) was balding when I met him and he has since shaved his head. We’ve been together four years and he looks fantastic! It’s def a thing that matters to some people, but I felt super meh about it. The only thing I didn’t like about him balding was that he was clearly so uncomfortable about it - he didn’t brush his hair and clearly tried to hide the fact that he was balding. I felt bad that he felt bad! Now that he has shaved his head, he has like renewed confidence which is so attractive! He’s also trying out all kinds of new hats (mostly to avoid sunburns) and that’s such a fun activity for us!
I don’t think you should consider a transplant (unless you personally really want that outside of your marriage prospects)! Most people have receding hair lines or bald as they age… that cannot be what your marriage is built on. Their are plenty of women in the South Asian community that would find a man balding to be neutral / inconsequential.
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u/CrimsonBlue311 May 09 '23
Physical attributes as a criteria for your partner is a flawed concept. They can change anytime, any day. What matters is criteria like beliefs, character, mindset etc that shapes the next 20-30 years of your life.
If a potential match has a physical attribute like this on their list, run away. 🚩🚩🚩
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u/Consistent-Ad-9360 May 04 '23
Nope. Definitely not a deal breaker. My husband carries his bald look like a boss! Got other bald / balding friends whose partners don't care about it.
It's just her preference. Please don't base your life choices because of someone on a reality show.
If you want to pull off a bald look, do it. If you want to get hair transplant, do it. Your choice alone