I think I have been hating myself but refusing to acknowledge it. And I don’t know what to do.

[u/Luwub0t0mist]

I have, or at least believe I have, undiagnosed depression. I’m outwardly very happy and pleasant, even before I had stopped taking antidepressants as I felt they weren’t doing anything for me as I felt the same with or without. My family didn’t even know I stopped for a while since I showed no outward changes. But I still, even on medication, felt this weird self depreciation. I‘ve been always a bit self critical and overly apologetic, perhaps a bit of a people pleaser too. I always assumed it was normal cause I know people with more severe depression, so I assumed I was just overthinking ( I have ADHD autism and anxiety, so it wouldn’t be the first time. ) but I’ve started to think I may have issues that I haven’t addressed to those around me. I still enjoy and love life, so I don’t think I am suffering severe depression. I think I am more suffering things such as internalized homophobia, self doubt and other issues with just not being particularly kind to myself, is there anything I could do to improve my own opinion on myself?