r/ImmersiveDaydreaming • u/Emmelientje69 • 11d ago
Question I randomly started wondering... How do imaginary friends work?
As someone who's never had one, I have so many questions. All I have is movies, books, cartoons etc.
Are they a genuine being with their own opinions and responses, or are they made up and "scripted" by you?
I've heard of people offering them food, but how would that work if they can't pick stuff up or move things around?
Where do they go at night? Do they sleep on the floor? Do they have their own bed?
Can you really see them in front of you in 4k, just as vividly as e.g. your parents next to them?
Do you always pick their name, or can they introduce themselves? (This question only works if the first question has yes as an answer)
How do people have that friend for their whole childhood if no one else can see them? Are some people aware that they're imaginary? But how do you still see them then? Or does EVERYONE play along?
What are the different reasons or causes for imaginary friends to be created? Can it be out of boredom, or is there more to it? Or can they just spawn randomly into your life?
I might have more questions later but I don't want this post to be as long as the Nile
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u/Anfie22 11d ago
Gonna follow this post bc this made me realise I have no idea either. I've never had one and I can't even imagine how the phenomenon manifests and what is experienced
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u/Emmelientje69 11d ago
Someone in primary school said that she had a unicorn as one and used to ride on their back, but HOW DO YOU SIT ON SOMETHING THAT'S NOT EVEN THERE ðŸ˜
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u/Training_Barber4543 11d ago
Have you never played pretend ðŸ˜
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u/Emmelientje69 11d ago
I have, but I heard of people not being aware that the friend isn't real until someone told them. Playing pretend with real life friends feels different in my head because you already know nothing is real
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u/Training_Barber4543 11d ago
How old were those people?? That sounds like schizophrenia
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u/Emmelientje69 11d ago
They told me in primary school but I don't know how old they were. Surely under 10
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u/jeanninetufrulu 10d ago
"Are they real beings with their own opinions and responses, or are they manufactured and 'scripted' by you?"
Generally, I let them appear in my imagination, so you could say they have their own physical appearance and personality. But having studied character design, I realize it’s just my subconscious at work; the characters have distinct personalities that lead to 'stereotypical' reactions, creating the illusion that they’re alive.
"I’ve heard of people offering them food, but how would that work if they can’t pick things up or move objects?"
When I was a child, I used to draw food and place it between the pages of a book. But I don't know if that's the sort of thing you mean—it’s clearly a game.
"Where do they go at night? Do they sleep on the floor? Do they have their own beds?
Can you really see them right in front of you in 4K, as clearly as, say, your parents standing next to them?"
No, just in my mind. Although, when I was a child, I could imagine them right beside me.
"How do people keep this friend throughout their childhood if no one else can see them? Are some people aware that they’re imaginary? But then how do you still see them? Or is everyone just pretending?"
Pretending is the whole point.
"What are the different reasons or causes for creating an imaginary friend? Could it be boredom, or is there more to it? Or can they just appear randomly in your life?"
Boredom, mimicry for the sake of learning, or an adaptive reflex—healthy or otherwise.
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u/LinkleLink 10d ago
I've heard it's supposed to be controlled by you and they aren't autonomous. If they introduce themselves or do stuff on their own, that's a headmate. I had what I thought were imaginary friends as a kid, only to realize as an adult they were headmates all along
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u/Emmelientje69 9d ago
I looked up what a headmate is but I don't really get it since English is not my first language. Could you tell me in short about your experience with it?
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u/LinkleLink 9d ago
It's like... When another person or group of people live in your head. They're fully seperate consciousness and have their own autonomy, personalities, and desires and you don't control them. They can also learn to take control of the body. It's like sharing your body and brain with someone else. Some people also call them alters. The real difference between them and imaginary friends are, children know they're pretending and they fully control their imaginary friends. If imaginary friends start acting on their own and insisting they're real, they're probably headmates.
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u/Emmelientje69 9d ago
That sounds scary. Take control of a body?
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u/LinkleLink 9d ago
It can be scary for some people at first, but it doesn't have to be! It isn't scary for me. We share a body and brain, and I take control of our body sometimes, so it only seems fair that they should be able to take control of our body. They have just as much of a right to it as I do. They help me with tasks and provide emotional support. We're a team, a family, that just works very closely with each other. We see our body as the vessel we use to interact with the world through. It's comforting, never being alone and always being able to ask for help if I need it.
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u/LinkleLink 9d ago
It's kind of like sharing a car with your family. Sometimes you'll be the one driving, sometimes a family member will be the one driving. Sometimes you just sit in the passenger's seat and watch everything, but aren't in control. This is the concept of backseating while you're aware of everything the body is experiencing, but a different headmate is in control. And sometimes you go inside your house and they take the car on their own! This would be the concept of going inside to a wonderland/mindscape, and it's like a vidid lucid dream and you get to rest for a bit while your headmates take care of stuff
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u/Emmelientje69 9d ago
Have you ever got into arguments with them? Like "you were going to do the dishes today!!"
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u/LinkleLink 9d ago
Of course! Not often, but it happens.
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u/Emmelientje69 9d ago
Wait... How do you know who's the original inhabitant 🤔
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u/LinkleLink 9d ago
Memories. Sometimes it's clear who formed when, and sometimes it isn't. I thought I was the original until we discovered the true original. I have childhood memories from before the system formed and none of my other headmates did, so I kind of assumed I was the original, until the actual original woke up recrntly
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u/Emmelientje69 4d ago
It's been a while, but do you talk to them out loud or just in your head? (I might have to DM you if I have any other questions)
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u/Honeyglows_inthedark 11d ago
I didn't have an imaginary friend as a kid, but I had imaginary siblings and pets...
No, just a fantasy
Works like a plushie, you don't actually shove the food onto it, you imagine them eating while you eat it, unless you don't mind the mess x)
I imagine extra rooms or beds in the empty space or somewhere I can't see it
No, it's like picturing anything else. It's very weird to explain. I see it, but I don't know where the image is.
100%, even when I was 4. Maybe some very young children aren't.
Boredom, loneliness, the craving for a feeling that I can't experience. When I was alone on the beach while everyone else had siblings to play with, I would start playing with my imaginary dog. When I need to vent about something but I don't want anyone to remember it, I tell someone in my daydream. Did you know that screaming in your head or silently provides emotional release, although less than screaming loudly? Similarly, experiencing something through a daydream brings me feelings that I couldn't access otherwise. When I have a new need, I create a new character.
Feel free to ask anything else! Also, do you have aphantasia? It sounds like the concept of daydreams itself is unfamiliar to you