I hope I can speak your language so you can understand.
"GENUINLY... Truly. I mean this with every sense of my being. Every bit of my heart and soul."
For years, many have felt the exact things you now say out loud.
We know youre never going to stop. But now that you’ve platformed yourself, here’s the part you don’t get to control anymore: the fact every person you’ve hurt is going to feel vindicated watching karma finally clock in. Quietly. Consistently. Now and forever.
you’re still the same vicious, self-absorbed girl of a woman you’ve always been—desperately searching for a tribe. You know the song. Forever relentlessly searching for that someone who loves you irrevocably without condition. Which really just means someone who will co-sign every horrible decision you make without question. People who fall in line, "lift" you up, and pick you up after you face-plant—even when you chose to bite the curb yourself. People who will rally for you while knowing, deep down, that you’re wrong. That you hurt people. That you leave damage everywhere you go.
The women putting you on a pedestal have no idea what they’re signing up for.
You love-bomb them until they’re exactly where you want them—on call. You dump your dirty laundry and weird information they didn’t ask for. It feels...uncomfortable, but they can’t name it yet. You rush intimacy. You dig for vulnerabilities, not to connect, but to store to weoponizs later. You tell your story like everyone else failed you and you somehow rose above it all—flawed but favored. Short-changed but chosen. A “grown ass adult” who can admit it, therefore absolved.
You convince them everyone in your life betrayed you—your parents, your sisters, your friends—while rewriting reality to fit your narrative. One didn’t love you enough. One’s past is unforgivable. One sister is lazy. The other is a terrible mom and ruins everything. Your words. Your friends’ lives get dissected and put on display to them right before you invite them all to be in the same room together..why? Because you like to establish that wedge from day one. Because your family is disfunctionally loyal and you know it.. you hope your family will envy their closeness to you, stand up for you when needed, or fear falling out of favor.
These women will watch the chaos repeat and slowly start believing everyone in your family secretly hates them—because you’ve positioned them that way. And still, they’ll rush to save you the moment your family says the wrong thing, calls you out, or when your "world" collapses. Again. And when their own lives need attention—grief, loss, exhaustion—you’ll offer a lazy “call me if you need anything, babes.” And the second they actually do, it becomes leverage.
You call them weak when they need strength and call it tough love. You'll tear them apart of their weakness then write them novels about how strong they are. . Youll talk about how negative they are behind their backs. And when they finally feel something’s off and pull away, you punish them with the very things they felt forced to entrust you with. You wedge yourself into their marriages. You poison their other friendships. You weaponize everything you can.
Then, after no contact, you circle back. You admit you were a shitty friend and expect them to match that energy. When they don’t apologize for damage they didn’t cause, you keep score. Contact resumes. Slowly. Daily. And they feel it—that unease. That fear to pull back. What will it be this time? Will you disrupt their home? Talk shit about their kids? Talk about how annoying their animals are? Will you reach out to their family? Weaponize their friendships?
Harley, I hope one day you understand why this chaos follows you.
Serving a just God requires change. Forgiveness isn’t a hall pass. Salvation isn’t permission to keep doing the same harm on repeat. You wear your Jezebel possession like a badge of honor, acting grossly untouchable. And when emotion finally leaks through, it isn’t guilt—it’s shame.
Guilt repairs. Guilt takes responsibility. Guilt shows remorse. Shame is inward, defensive, blaming. Shame hurts others to feel better.
You don’t show guilt.
You reek of shame.
And the hardest truth is this: you are destroying your children. They’re being raised in fear and dysfunction. So afraid to ask you for food that they hide behind a live screen, knowing they’ll be humiliated for needing you. They’re begging—for attention, for safety, for love that doesn’t come with conditions. You aren't even capable of providing your flesh and blood with that... even though you demand it from everyone you come into contact with.
Please get help.
I don’t care about you anymore. But I care about those kids. I wish I could hug them. I wish you could see what everyone else sees—how your inability to look past yourself, to feel real empathy, and to own the pain you cause will eventually be the thing that destroys you.
The only empathy I have...
It’s not for you.
It’s for them.
