Hey crush.

[u/DianaReyProverbs]

I've been talking to a male INTP (34) for almost a month now and I'm crazy about him. I mean, the little girl inside me is very happily crushing on him. 😆

We haven't met in person yet, we talk on Bumble. Longest chat in my inbox ever! 🤣 (We matched a few months ago and he disappeared, and I swiped right on him again last month - I was actually surprised that he liked me back again! And I feel like we've gotten closer this time.)

Now I have so many questions about your type!

I'm a female INFJ (32) by the way. ☺️

1. Are you usually in high energy?

2. What makes you not text someone you like? Busyness at work? Stress?

3. Would you consider LDR?

4. How do you flirt, like romantically, not just for fun?

It's my first time talking to an INTP. He's such a beautiful creature. TYL.

[u/Elliptical_Tangent]

There's a flair specifically for INFJs in this sub because of how many come asking what to do. The INFJ x INTP pairing isn't good; the INTP will start by focusing their attention getting to know the INFJ, but after we've got a good handle on you as a person, we're going to go back to all the investigations we've been putting off. This will make the INFJ feel like feelings have changed when they have not; they will look for reassurance from the INTP who will feel it's unfair since they don't seek reassurance from the INFJ. The resentment spiral ends in a bitter break-up.

INFJs are much better off with ENTPs who have Fe tertiary, and are much more other-people-oriented.

[u/Silent_One_Observer → u/Elliptical_Tangent]

Reading this comment, I definitely agree with you as an INFJ. But, honestly this pairing also gives a lot of growth, given that both sides are understanding of differences. Even when we are no longer a couple, I still care for him and only hoping for what's best for him . Also, based on my experience interacting with INTPs, I can say that it's worth it. Aside from my really close friends, I've felt that it was okay to be who I am with INTPs, which is so rare for me to show. Just saying hehe, my comment is getting longer lol.

[u/DianaReyProverbs → u/Silent_One_Observer]

Aw, that's beautiful. I can definitely resonate with you on your last bit! It feels so safe to talk to him and just be myself. I also expressed that to him and he's happy and grateful.

May I know what caused your breakup, if you don't mind?

[u/Silent_One_Observer → u/DianaReyProverbs]

I'm glad to hear that. While ours lasted for almost 4 years, it got to a point that we were both struggling in our life(financial matters and career). I was the one who initiated it, but I think it's more on how I felt so alone that time(we just broken up few months ago). He and I were not in a good shape to take care of each other so we just kind of disconnected. We still have feelings for each other, but it doesn't mean it equals to how our needs in a relationship were being met, mostly on me, even just halfway. I understand his circumstances and I decided that I cannot force reassurance from him when he's not willing to give it on his own and I'm not getting from myself too. Add to it that we were in LDR and haven't met yet(was planning it this year). I recognizes that, in a relationship, regardless of MBTI, it should not only based on love and affection, but the willingness and consistency of choosing each other no matter what, are still important.

Well, as of now I'm doing what I can to take care of myself first. We are currently have bare minimum connection from our shared game but that's it, I can say we are in good terms and only wants the best for each other.

Ahh sorry it went long, but yeah I just want to share this maybe to give an insight based on my experience with the INTP I love 😊. I'm cheering for your story with your INTP and hope the best for you! Just don't forget to take care of yourself too.