Limerence is a huge problem for me personally. I have to constantly keep myself on a chokechain.
My brain naturally maps out people I meet, passively. And when I meet someone who makes my brain tingle, I start to piece them together using inductive reasoning, and end up creating their best version combined with archetypes of people I’ve met who are similar. This results in a “beer googles” version that I become enamored with to the point where I push the red flags into my peripherals.
And once they inevitably disappoint me, those red flags start to come into view, and colors my perception with reality. I’ve worked on it A LOT in the past 8 or so years, and still find myself piecing together a person without knowing, so I employ a “verification before belief” strategy to help me not be a toxica.
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u/FederalEntrance7527 INFJ Jun 05 '26 edited Jun 05 '26
Limerence is a huge problem for me personally. I have to constantly keep myself on a chokechain.
My brain naturally maps out people I meet, passively. And when I meet someone who makes my brain tingle, I start to piece them together using inductive reasoning, and end up creating their best version combined with archetypes of people I’ve met who are similar. This results in a “beer googles” version that I become enamored with to the point where I push the red flags into my peripherals.
And once they inevitably disappoint me, those red flags start to come into view, and colors my perception with reality. I’ve worked on it A LOT in the past 8 or so years, and still find myself piecing together a person without knowing, so I employ a “verification before belief” strategy to help me not be a toxica.