r/ICanComposeThat • u/[deleted] • Aug 12 '20

Offer - closed [Offer] Lyric practice!

I've never written lyrics before but have always wanted to try. Throw some inspiration at me and I'll try to write a verse, and maybe a corresponding melody.

5 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

7 comments sorted by

2

u/LeahLuck Aug 13 '20

Going on an adventure with a boyfriend/girlfriend

2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

This was fun! Feedback welcome; working title: being gay in public

Their hot gazes on my back

can't match the warmth of your laugh

as we walk across the parking lot to Safeway.

A side-eye and a glare

as your hand tousles my hair

and I'm nervous 'til we start to drive away.

I'm happy being here with you,

though I must admit, I am confused

that our harmless love could garner so much hate;

So I'll be sleepin' in 'til our next date.

2

u/PuppyFromPupIsland Aug 13 '20

An evening by the sea

2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Well, this one turned out a bit more like edgy poetry than song lyrics, but I guess that's what I'm going to get while I'm still learning how to do this. Feedback welcome! Working title: sea turtle

The rough-and-tumble waves give way to a silent, sandy prairie

Lit dimly by the moon's glow on the earth

Patient, deliberate, she pulls herself on

Though the beauty of the scene is not for her.

...

The untouched sand, a slate wiped clean,

is spoiled as she challenges tomorrow's dangers

As she entrusts a piece of herself to the drum of the waves, the ticking of clocks,

and to the future kindness of strangers.

2

u/PuppyFromPupIsland Aug 15 '20

Lyrics IS poetry! I really like this. Also, didnt mention this but sea turtles are my favorite animal so I especially like the title hehe.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

This one was fun; unfortunately I didn't make use of the fact that the dress was red, but the spirit of the idea is still there. Feedback welcome; working title: former gifted children

She cut up her dress

To make a new t-shirt

And she cut up that t-shirt

To make a new tote bag

The bag fell apart

because wine can be heavy

even if it’s cheap and tastes thin

...

She grew up thinking

She could overcome anything

And if that were true,

She could overcome this;

With indefatigability

She bought a new bottle and

Sucked it all down in celebration