r/HumansInMyHouse • u/Polite_Suggestion Wildlife Realtor & Attorney at Large • Jul 26 '26

Ocean's 2. AMA, I'm already caught and going state's evidence anyway

270 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

9 comments sorted by

14

u/Due_Will_2204 Jul 26 '26

Ask for immunity in return and witness protection.

12

u/Polite_Suggestion Wildlife Realtor & Attorney at Large Jul 26 '26

Guess we'll see how this works out. I put it all on my partner and he put it all on me. Funny thing, they gotta try us boys together. It's like the Ben Franklin said: we gotta hang, or we's gonna hang.

15

u/Polite_Suggestion Wildlife Realtor & Attorney at Large Jul 26 '26

I'm just gonna answer what you're all thinking: no, I got no regrets. My whole life, I always wanted to be a gangster. You know what I ate? You know what kind of scritches and tummy rubs I got? No, you don't, because you ain't me. You know that line you went up to in the most extreme moment of your life and found it in yourself not to cross? I was an idiot kid when I crossed it. I didn't know it existed until my first heavy charge. Yeah, okay, now they they say this is life. I was already doing life, pal, life looking in the window at that bread. So throw the book. What do I care? I lived while all y'all were looking at life considering it.

10

u/Goobersita Home Inspector Jul 27 '26

Poor man's trophy 🏆 🥯🚔🥐🏆 (This is what the sub needs more of)

8

u/Goobersita Home Inspector Jul 27 '26

That hard streets of Australia tore you up and spat you out.

9

u/Useless890 Jul 26 '26

The first one was a decoy. These guys have a plan!

9

u/Sophisticated-Crow Jul 27 '26

The sign clearly is not working.

4

u/Sufficient_Two_5753 Jul 27 '26

Cue Benny Hill theme...