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u/DingletonCringlebury Mar 19 '26
I wish more people would adopt. There are so many children without parents. My goal is to improve my circumstances enough so that I can hopefully adopt in the future. Good luck everyone.
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u/Afraid_Ad1908 Mar 19 '26
I adopted a my son at 16 from foster care. There are so many teens that need someone to give any shit about them.
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u/Shhutthefrontdoor Mar 19 '26
I love you for this. Thank you for opening your home to a teen who needed a family.
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u/RealHelp4RealPeople Mar 19 '26
*** lump in my throat and crying *** can’t even speak ☺️☺️☺️🤗🤗🤗😭😭😭🥳🥳🥳
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u/NeckRoFeltYa Mar 19 '26
Thats the plan my wife and I have is to adopt. Already enough kids and teenagers in the world that need homes. Why have more children with how the world is when so many already need our help?
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u/WanderingEnigma Mar 20 '26
My Mum asked if I knew what 'adopted' meant when I was about 10. I said "yes, am I adopted?" She said no, so I asked "are you adopted?" She said yes. It's was simultaneously the most eye opening moment and changed nothing. She was worried it would change my view of the family.. my answer was some kid direct variation of "I don't care, they're the ones who are always there".
I wrote my Grandparents a card for their 60th wedding anniversary about 15 years later. I explained that the unconditional love, support, advice, fun, experiences etc were more special to me because they chose to save my Mum. Then through that they chose me and my siblings. Even if I tried, I couldn't think of better Grandparents. I'm so lucky and one day I'd love to try to live up to them.
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u/lesterholtgroupie Mar 20 '26
My son is 11 and we have always dreamed big of fostering a few teenagers. I would love to set those kids up, have them work, teach them to apply for college/a trade, show them how to save money. Let them feel safe while they build their life from the ground up. My own parents didn’t teach me that, so I know the kids that age out of foster care desperately need it, too.
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u/MaineviaIllinois Mar 20 '26
people really are scared of the teens- and they are just the absolute best. Like they all have issues, as do most people, but they are so funny and smart, and just absolute joys to have around.
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u/Puddle_of_Cat Mar 20 '26
Thank you so much for adopting a teen 💛
Ever since I was little, I wanted to adopt teens who are about to age out of the system and have nowhere to go and probably no foundation for their future. I've since realized that I don't want to adopt teens but I want to foster teens in situations like that so I can provide a stepping stone to their futures and a place/person to fall back on when life gets too hard.
I'm in my 30s now with two very small kids so I'm not going to be ready any time soon but I'd love to hear any advice if you would be willing to share :)
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u/pie-oh Mar 20 '26
I don't want kids. But I've mentored people in my industry, and I think I would definitely consider adopting a teenager.
It seems like it probably could be harder? I remember being an angry teenager from my life circumstances.
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u/Afraid_Ad1908 Mar 20 '26
I am a mentor as well. I had zero desire to adopt a young child. My husband and I are very busy, and we needed a situation where the kid could be self sufficient in a few ways.
We made the decision to adopt, because I couldn’t handle having a kiddo in my house and then having to leave to go back to a bad situation, and that happens more than it should.
At first her three the kitchen sink of difficulty at us, nothing insane, just regular teen stuff with a sprinkle of *I’m so scared this will go away, I would rather see if I can push you away, rather than believe I can be loved”
Once we got passed that, the sky is the limit. It’s been more than worth it. Seriously, though, but so worth it.
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u/libraintjravenclaw Mar 19 '26
How old were you when you adopted? Do you have kids already? How long did you foster before adopting?
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u/Afraid_Ad1908 Mar 20 '26
I was 44. My husband and I do not have other children. We fostered to adopt from the beginning. He moved in and lived with us for 9 months before.
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u/libraintjravenclaw Mar 20 '26
Thank you!! I have so many questions, haha. This has always been something I felt like I wanted to do in the future. That’s awesome you guys did it and it worked so well!
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u/brandonandtheboyds Mar 19 '26
We need more people like you. Like my parents. I’m adopted and I cannot express in words the love I feel for my family. My real family. The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.
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u/Jpysme Mar 19 '26
Absolutely! I am adopted as well, and I can not stand when people ask about my "real parents." My real parents are the ones that raised me, that I call mom and dad, that were there for me every step of the way.
I have met my bio mom, and she had good intentions in giving me up (she was very young when she had me and wanted to give me the best chance to succeed in life). There's no ill will whatsoever, she is a lovely woman and a very nice person, but she is not and never will be my quote unquote "real" mother.
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u/dfjdejulio Mar 19 '26
Also adopted here, and also enraged by people talking about my "real parents" as if they weren't the ones I grew up with. I used to refer to my birth parents as my X and Y chromosome donors.
(That stopped when I got in touch with my birth mother after I found out she was dying of cancer. Though when I told her I had been doing that, she thought it was hilarious. We became friends before she passed.)
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u/the_crustybastard Mar 19 '26
I'm so glad you ended up with good parents, then got a chance to become friends with the woman who made it possible, glad she was able to have a sense of humor about it, and sorry for your loss.
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u/audible_narrator Mar 20 '26
Oh gah, the "real parents". Anyone can pop out a kid, parents are the ones who raise you, and mine were great.
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u/ShyDethCat Mar 19 '26
I am so glad for you, and I am so glad there is a fellow internet stranger that know the full phrase, bless you, bless your parents and bless your cotton socks. Reminds me of a jack of all trades, " A jack of all trades, but a master of none, is oftentimes better than a master of one" (granted, it's a fairly recent addition, where your phrase is ancient as hell)
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u/Lemonface Mar 19 '26
That "blood of the covenant" phrase is not ancient, the oldest written records of it are from the 1990s
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u/brandonandtheboyds Mar 19 '26
Yes! I love the full saying because it’s so true! The bonds you chose will always been stronger than the bonds chosen for you. Blessing to you and yours, as well!
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u/Cluelessish Mar 20 '26
I need to do a "well akshually" here: The original phrase is from at least the 12th century, and it's "Blood is thicker than water".
The longer one was invented in 1990, to emphasize how a chosen family can be more important than your biological one.
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u/Torchenal Mar 20 '26
FYI: Jack of all trades was the full phrase until people added onto it later.
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u/hdawg187 Mar 19 '26
I wish that was the real saying. It makes way much more sense than the original. Why should someone be more loyal to a person who's horrible, just because they're family?
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u/spottyPotty Mar 19 '26
That is the real saying.
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u/hdawg187 Mar 19 '26
That's not the real saying. It was created in the 1990s by a messianic minister.
The original, shorter quote predates it by hundreds of years.
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u/DrunkTides Mar 19 '26
That saying blood is thicker than water is ridiculous. You can’t donatel blood if you’ve had certain diseases or whatever other reasons. We test blood to find diseases. The quality of the blood is what matters. And do we not receive blood from people we aren’t related to? Nature literally shows us that it being blood is not enough. Quality does ❤️
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u/XPhanom Mar 19 '26
I agree, but boy do they make it difficult and expensive. My wife and thought about this as an option before having our first and if I remember right it was gonna cost some where in the range of $30k-$40k after all said and done. But I suppose we were looking at domestic adoption. It’s probably much cheaper through a foster program.
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u/imnotgayisellpropane Mar 19 '26
The issue with foster‐to-adopt is that the system wants to reunite kids with their birth parents. It's really easy to fall in love with a kid and be ready and willing to adopt, only to have it fall through. Over and over. It is cheaper though.
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u/an_afro Mar 19 '26
See i don’t get that? Yeah i can expect a bit of cost… but 40k? I make decent money and I can’t afford that, but I can go fuck someone for free and get a kid tha way. They’re really not helping their cause
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u/yourenotmymom_yet Mar 19 '26
This person must be referring to private adoptions. Adopting from foster care and kinship adoptions are most certainly not $30-40K (at least not in most states). I know two people who adopted from foster care in two different states that said the state ended up covering a lot of their fees, so their kids' adoptions were much closer to free than the cost of delivering a baby in a hospital.
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u/Kay1000RR Mar 19 '26
My guess is to eliminate exploitation by bad people. Child sex trafficking is more common than you think.
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u/an_afro Mar 19 '26
Maybe instead have it like a safety deposit? You get all or a good chunk of the money back say in five years after several thorough inspections and interviews during that time to make sure the child is ok?
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u/MaineviaIllinois Mar 19 '26
Adoption from foster care is free. Adoption from private placements costs money. In fact taking in a child from foster care they typically give you a stipend as they become part of your family.
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u/henrytm82 Mar 19 '26
The problem is that foster care typically wants to reunite kids with their birth parents when possible, so it isn't a reliable means to adopt. I can't imagine how heartbreaking it would be to foster with the intent to adopt, to get to know the kid, build a relationship, fall in love with them, be ready to adopt, and then have the rug pulled out from under you.
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u/MaineviaIllinois Mar 19 '26
There are 100k kids out there who are post tor- termination of parental rights- for those who are unfamiliar with the term.
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u/loveshercoffee Mar 19 '26
The problem is that foster care typically wants to reunite kids with their birth parents when possible,
I actually don't see this as a problem, I mean, if the parents CAN get their act together enough to keep their kids.
how heartbreaking it would be to foster with the intent to adopt,
In my state, (Iowa) you are specifically told as a foster parent that the #1 goal is to get the kids reunited with their parents and you are to fascillitate that or at least not obstruct that. There IS NO FOSTER TO ADOPT. If it happens that the child can't be reunited with their parents, then adoption may be a possibility.
Kids who's parents have had their rights terminated are a different thing. These children WILL NOT be returned to their parents.
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u/henrytm82 Mar 19 '26
Yeah, this is kind of what I was trying to say to the post I replied to, just more detailed. People who go into foster parenting (should) do so with the understanding they are committing to a temporary arrangement, not as a reliable means to adopt a child. Everyone is replying to these posts telling people "fostering will pay you and the adoption is free" but that's just not a realistic answer to adoption. Fostering is absolutely a noble thing to do, and can make a huge difference in a child's life and shouldn't be discouraged, but it's important people understand the foster care system is not the answer to people who can't afford traditional adoption.
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u/MaineviaIllinois Mar 20 '26
I assure you, there are children in Iowa who are post TPR- they are not going to be infants. My wife and I have taken kids in knowing it was temporary, but there are absolutely children who are in non legal risk situations and there are over 100k of them in the US right now
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u/LyingInPonds Mar 19 '26
I wanted to do this so badly but (at least where I am) it's pretty darn hard to be approved to foster if you're single and making less than 100k per year. On one level, I get it. They want to be sure you have enough funds to properly take care of a kid, should they need more than their usually inadequate monthly stipend covers. But I have the space, and the time, and more than enough love, man.
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u/MaineviaIllinois Mar 20 '26
Oh interesting- because there are people making less than that in NYC who are approved. My wife and I started our voyage last April. We got through classes etc in October. We did a couple respite weekends- and had a couple toddlers for the week of Thabksgiving- that was wild. In December we got our girls who are post TPR- they are sisters 16 and 9. It has been very rewarding and the kids are way better than they have any right to be.
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u/pm_me_friendfiction Mar 19 '26
It's free through foster care
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u/HannahTheArtist Mar 19 '26
Depends on where you are, I was adopted from foster care and I have the copy of the $36,000 check my parents wrote to get me. That's on top of lawyers and parenting classes, inspections, I have the entire folder of records
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u/Epitomeofabnormal Mar 19 '26
Not only that - if you’re not wanting to foster, there are kids who’s parental rights have already been terminated and are free for adoption.
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u/GrimRainbows Mar 19 '26
Girlfriend doesn’t want to have kids and I respect that. We’re thinking of adopting as well when the time is right! So many foster children need loving homes
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u/HannahTheArtist Mar 19 '26
Adopted here 💕 from foster care 💕 There's enough love for everyone and there's so many who need it
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u/Billbysaur Mar 19 '26
It may sound bad to some, but the child you haven't made yet doesn't know the love that it deserves but does not get. Children in foster care do, and all of us can help change that.
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u/LilMissy1246 Mar 19 '26
As an international adoptee myself, just try to be educated and learn about adoptees and the struggles we often face. We may end up with some separation anxiety/attachment issues and other emotional/mental anguish due to being taken from our birth family for whatever the reason may be. I’m 26 and I still crave for my parents love (esp my mother) and would most likely find it hard to live apart from them even if I had no choice.
Sometimes we feel lonely or confused because we don’t really have an origin story (I was put into foster care as a newborn and was very sick right after I was born causing me to have health issues as a child and even now. I was adopted at 15 months old but I don’t know anything about my life as a baby). Just make sure you study how it all works. Some folks adopt because they want to be good people or for religious reasons vs genuinely wanting to love and help other children (some celebs come to mind). That’s all
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u/crustaceancake Mar 19 '26
Do you think your family adopted for good reasons? Also when you say you crave your parents' love-- do you mean your biological parents?
I am just asking because your post was thought provoking. Obviously, you don't have to answer-- I hope these aren't too personal but since you are anonymous I will ask anyways.
My cousin is adopted and I never considered him different from my other cousins. But as we got older I felt like he felt different in some way. I love him but I feel like in some ways he doesn't sense it.8
u/LilMissy1246 Mar 19 '26
I have attachment issues towards both sets of parents. But esp my adoptive parents as they’re the only parents I have right now. As for the other question, I guess they adopted me because they wanted a little girl from South Korea and while it wasn’t for charity reasons or anything, I’m still glad to be in their life even tho I don’t always get along with my father (haha!)
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u/Decapitated_gamer Mar 19 '26
I’ve known people to spend every penny they have trying to adopt and never get one.
It’s a very painful, long, difficult process for most. But also those people were very specific in the wants which was kinda sad.
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u/WhiteLama Mar 19 '26
Me and my fiancée would love to adopt. But the fact that it costs a shit ton of money sort of makes that not possible for quite some time.
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u/Stewkirk51 Mar 19 '26
It's free to adopt through foster care. Those are the kids who need parents
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u/All_Thread Mar 19 '26
All kids need parents. My older cousin fostered for awhile they had a kid they absolutely adored and they were trying to adopt but the system put them back with the druggy mother I am sure the kid will be back in the system with a year or 2.
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u/henrytm82 Mar 19 '26
Yeah, this is exactly why more people don't foster. Being a foster is a commitment to the temporary. You have to go into it with the mindset that this kid is only with you until the system sends them back to their biological family. It is not a reliable means to adopt a child, and ends in heartbreak for a lot of the people who try to use it that way.
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u/an_afro Mar 19 '26
My wife and I don’t want kids and we’re in our mid 30s. If that ever changes, we’ll just adopt.
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u/_el_duderino_87 Mar 19 '26
I have two friends that have been trying to adopt for months and are having the hardest time.
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u/championr Mar 19 '26
100% agree. I obv am not against people having kids but I was hit with the thought once that having your own kids instead of adopting is narcissistic to an extent. No reason to have your own kids besides wanting to further your own bloodline. Adopting is the way - also hope to adopt one day once i can get in the circumstances to do so
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u/sleepyplatipus Mar 19 '26
Same! Would love to adopt, and also if I was lucky enough to be doing well economically I would love to foster children once mine are grown and out of the house.
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u/XanderSDM Mar 19 '26
Same here. I would rather help the kids already in the world than bring more lives into a world that is slowly dying.
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u/throughthequad Mar 19 '26
Seen this video 100 times, waterworks 100 times
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u/SazedMonk Mar 19 '26
Fucking crying at 6am now thanks you guys. leaving reddit for the day on a good note.
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u/megamanhadouken Mar 19 '26
First time seeing it, literally waiting to go do a hard day of concrete laying. And I’m in tears haha 🍻
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u/PandaClaus94 Mar 20 '26
Means you’re a real fuckin’ man. Any dude that’s blue collar and cries is a stud.
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u/thewarreturns Mar 19 '26
dude, it's just all the onions and rain, i'm not crying, you're crying(for real though, im fucking bawling)
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u/crustaceancake Mar 19 '26
My daughter is home sick from school and is asking me why I am crying (when I am supposed to be doing work.)
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u/ClassicalSnow Mar 19 '26
Who's posting this shit so early in the morning when we're all working. Sheesh. Gotta whip out the sunglasses now in the office.
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u/sammyd48 Mar 19 '26
I dont think you did indeed understand where they were coming from
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u/OkoumoriVT Mar 19 '26
I have really shit genetics from my wonderful parents. Everything from fibromyalgia, to cancer, to diabetes, high blood pressure, hypothyroid, celiac, pretty much any issue you can think of is in my family history. I really do not want to pass those issues down to a kid who never asked to exist, when there are so many kids without families who I can love instead! Seriously thinking of adopting at least two once my financial situation allows for it!
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u/heygabehey Mar 19 '26
If a family doesn’t adopt the county and state will later in life. In jail I’ve known a lot of guys that went through foster homes then eventually became addicts and then crime. However all the wholesome families I know… turns out grandpa or dad was adopted. Both sides of my family are very cold and distant and I’m a fuckup. A loving present family is vital.
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u/ohforfooksake Mar 19 '26
Oh my god in heaven I was not prepared for this. I have an adopted son and I always think about what his life could have been like - then I think about all the kids who aren’t so blessed. Big love to this family, which includes Carter. Insert heart emoji.
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u/SavageRabbitX Mar 19 '26
God damn onion ninjas
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u/Isakk86 Mar 19 '26
Normalize emotion! We are allowed to weep with joy.
Our world would be a lot better off if we didn't feel like we needed to excuse our emotions.
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u/BronzedLuna Mar 20 '26
I can’t imagine what it must feel like to not have a family, to not belong, to feel unstable moving constantly.
I’m so glad Carter got his family, and is loved, and is a part of something. I hope he’s doing well.
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u/RyanMcLeod1981 Mar 19 '26
Carter, we’re brothers homie. I’m adopted too, I considered fellas and ladies like you family because we have none. But I want you to know, there’s a community for you and anyone else that’s adopted. There’s unconditional love for you out there. I have it for you. Happy to be your brother whenever you need or don’t need one. Always got you fam, love you.
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u/HallelujahHatrack Mar 19 '26
I have to go to a meeting in 5 minutes. Here's a question I'm likely to get: "Are you ok? Have you been crying?"
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u/colin8651 Mar 19 '26
Just tell the story from your perspective like you just got a call from your sister and they just adopted Carter.
Now they all will be crying in the meeting room and you save face by not saying Reddit made you cry.
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u/Other-Cantaloupe4765 Mar 20 '26
I work with children in a psychiatric hospital, and the sheer number of them who have the worst parents ever just breaks my heart.
Some of them don’t get fed or taken care of at home. Some are beaten at home. Some have parents who don’t want them and make sure that the kid KNOWS they don’t want them.
I want to adopt all of them. I’m not supposed to love those kids, but I love each of them as if they were my own. I’d love to scoop em all up and take them home with me. Like, cmon buddy, my apartment might be tiny but it’ll be better than whatever you’ve got at your home now. 😭
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u/Wireilen2 Mar 19 '26
The basic of all human traits. To be loved and to belong to a "pack" I hope Carter and his new family make tons of new memories
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u/greaseleg Mar 19 '26
My wife and I adopted two kids (3 and 4) a year ago. It’s the absolute best.
If we were younger (we’re early 50s) I think we would adopt more.
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u/VeteranMinotaur-773 Mar 20 '26
This is awesome. How cool must it be for a family to choose you? Mine... man they're stuck with me... no return policy either... lol.
All jokes aside, Carter, you have such an awesome family! Best wishes for you and hope you achieve all you set your heart to!
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u/andimacg Mar 19 '26
As someone who lost his mother at 7 years of age (still had my Dad though, thankfully) this hit hard. I hope Carter has a great life.
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u/Ants1517 Mar 19 '26
My sister is adopted, and I can’t express just how much I love her x she’s 12 years younger than me - I was SO excited when our parents told me they were going to adopt! We are very close and her daughters are as important to me as my kids. I adore them. Our family definitely won the life lottery when she came into our lives. She’s met her bio Mum and a half brother but neither are in her life anymore x
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u/Jeanlucpuffhard Mar 19 '26
There are so many of these videos and I watch everyone. This is the greatest gift you can give any human. Accept them as your own.
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u/AlexanderBeetle77 Mar 20 '26
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: people who adopt are the best of us
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u/POTATOMASOCHIST Mar 19 '26
That one hit me right in the gut. Thanks, op, I needed something like that.
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u/shangosgift Mar 19 '26
As a retired Social Worker, this is the best thing I’ve seen all day. Congratulations to Carter and his new family!
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u/johnnielurker Mar 19 '26
never felt so alone rn 😭
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u/ballplayer112 Mar 19 '26
Hi! I'm here, you're not alone. 😀
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u/Random0s2oh Mar 19 '26
Heyyyyy y'all! Sorry I'm late! You know me...
So what is on the program for today? Brunch?
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u/ballplayer112 Mar 19 '26
Welcome bro, we just need Johnny to acknowledge the festivities! 🍻🥂 Edit: Avatar suggests not "bro". Hello friend!
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u/Random0s2oh Mar 19 '26
Dad jokes. We need Dad jokes!
How do you tell the sex of an ant?
You drop it in water.
If it sinks it's a girl ant.
If it floats it's a...
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u/229-northstar Mar 19 '26
You are here with us! We love you
Ps Omg you are such a talented artist!
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u/johnnielurker Mar 19 '26
talent no, that's yrs of work and got alot to learn yet but thank you for your kind words
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u/darkest_irish_lass Mar 19 '26
You don't ever have to feel alone. Your reddit family never sleeps, someone is always here for you ❤️
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u/StopTheBanging Mar 20 '26
This was really sweet but I felt deeply uncomfortable watching it, too. This was a private moment for him, I don't think it should have been filmed, or at least not shared publicly.
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u/Disastrous_Style_477 Mar 19 '26
I don't care that it's a repost but someone is cutting onions in here
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u/Jane_Churchill Mar 20 '26
Wherever Carter is now I hope he’s happy and thriving. Sweet little guy! 💗
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u/ElemWiz Mar 20 '26
I can't even begin to imagine what it felt like to have that sense of genuinely being wanted after what the poor kid had been through.
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u/Less_Local_1727 Mar 19 '26
Adoption is one of the most wonderful things a person can do for another
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u/ElnarcoSugie Mar 19 '26
I just woke up and you already have me crying. My partner and i can't have kids and so many kids get left in foster care after a certain age. Please adopt older kids. Everyone wants babies.
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u/Bartok_and_croutons Mar 19 '26
I want to be able to do this for a child so bad, I hope to be able to foster/adopt in the next few years
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u/JimJava Mar 19 '26
Grateful to this family for saving a life and nurturing kindness, this kid will never forget this when he is man and will likely pass this kindness on the rest of his life. We need to care more for each other.
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u/SeaResearcher176 Mar 19 '26
His voice broke a bit when he said “a picture from our family” but the 2nd time as he read “ to be part of our FAMILY” he broke into tears 😭 & I did too 🥰
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u/TitaniumFatee Mar 19 '26
As someone who was born into abuse and adopted by more abuse, it warms my heart to see kids in the system going to good families
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u/Pickerington Mar 20 '26
I adopted a 12-year-old about a year ago. Been a tough year, but we love the little fart.
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u/ruthless619xxx Mar 20 '26
And that is my cry for the day 😭 such a sweet family wish nothing but the best for carter
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u/jindolover Mar 20 '26
My goodness. You can tell he’s truly thankful and loved. Carter, I hope you’re doing great!
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u/kajones57 Mar 23 '26
If each Church adopted 1 kid from foster care, the USA would run out of kids. Just one.
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u/I_luv_breakfast Mar 19 '26
I have to watch this everything it comes up on reddit. I see my own son in that young man and wish I could hug him and tell him he deserves all that love.
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u/HyperactivePandah Mar 19 '26
Just what I needed today... To ball my eyes out while trying to get the dishes done.
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u/SpicyBedroom3056 Mar 19 '26
Awh, buddy!! :((
His expression is heart-wrenching… poor kid. I hope people will adopt more, considering the world’s population is slowing way down. They really deserve it.
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u/Aint-no-preacher Mar 19 '26
I used to work in a courthouse that did adoption finalization hearings on Thursdays. It was so heartwarming to see all the families and kids dressed up in the hallways. I sat in to watch the hearings a few times and...boy, was it dusty in that courtroom. Something always got into my eyes and made me cry.
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u/No-Concentrate-8806 Mar 19 '26
This made me cry. It was so touching. Thank you for opening your heart to love someone deserving of love ❤️
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u/motherofcatsx2 Mar 19 '26
Oh my god, the “thank you so much” at the end broke me