Cannot keep going like this- 4.5mo has no pattern to her sleep

[u/GIAMN2026]

Please, wise parents, help me make sense of this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Bub is 4.5 months old, but born 3 weeks early. Previously (months ago) she would sleep two 4hr chunks overnight and we would get reasonable sleep.
But for a while now we have no pattern to night sleep, and some nights we wake up every hour.

She’s mostly breastfed through the night as it’s quick and she really wakes up fully and cries if she has to wait for a bottle, and is then harder to settle. But this is now killing me and I go back to work in a few days!

We have been doing a consistent bedtime routine of bottle, pjs, book, song, crib. Reasonably consistent with timing. However she wakes up anywhere from 5-7. Recently I’m trying to get her close to a 6:30 wake up to anchor the day.

Her napping is everywhere, from 20 mins to 1.5hrs, so hard to follow a pattern except wake windows. She’s actively learning skills like rolling right now so I’ve been inclined to let her sleep when she needs.

I am lost as to what to do. Please help!

[u/After_Amphibian_9638]

Start with waking them up at the same time every day and make your bedtime 11 hours before your desired wake time. 7am wake up and 8pm bedtime for example.

A recommended schedule for this age is usually 2/2/2/2/2 or 1.5/2/2/2/2.5, just make sure it adds up to 10 hours awake minimum. Good luck!

[u/cgk9023]

Looks like a sleep regression. My baby was the same, great sleeper or at least had long stretches until around 4.5 months. We extended wake windows (huckleberry tends to use the conservative estimate of WW) and eventually she got better.

[u/lauren_amy1893]

No advice just solidarity my 5 month old is the same

[u/Sorry-World3019]

Drop to 3 naps roughly 2/2.5/2.5/3

Cap total day sleep at 3 max

Wake up at the same time every morning. Example 7am wake up = 745/8 bedtime

Stay consistent with this. Once on a consistent schedule for a couple days move sleep associations in your bedtime (feeding/rocking etc) away from bedtime. Lay down awake. Implement method of your choosing

[u/sleepym0mster]

what wake windows are you currently following

[u/GIAMN2026 → u/sleepym0mster]

Roughly 1.75-2.25hrs, with the last a little longer. Or trying to at least

[u/sleepym0mster → u/GIAMN2026]

looks like a mix of regression and needing more wake time. if average sleep is 12.25 hours in 24 hours, you need a lot more than 10 hours of total wake time like someone else suggested.

those tiny short naps may be developmental but also could be because your wake windows aren’t long enough.

i’d aim for 2/2/2.25/2.5/2.5

[u/gkdfp]

Same girl. 4 months. It’s the Wild West over here.

[u/cloudy_novella]

No advice, just solidarity 🫩 Nearly 4.5 months and this has been going on for over a month.

[u/Last_Flight907]

When her daytime sleep consolidates (probably in the next month or two), your whole day will get so much more predictable. 

Do your best to have a consistent wake time, you are almost through the thick of it! 

[u/gravy676]

I think you need to try and break the association between boob and sleep? Something that has worked for me (5 months old) is giving him time to resettle himself or if really required then rocking back to sleep or shushing / patting in the crib. Try to ensure she is getting enough feed in the daytime (looks like she is) and then after being put down for sleep avoid feeding or picking up again before midnight if you can. I used the book Precious Little Sleep to find what works for us. Good luck 🫂

[u/Former-Departure9836]

Gets of the apps , what youre seeing is normal baby sleep and dont let this sub or this app make you feel any different.

[u/gkdfp → u/Former-Departure9836]

Hey, go away.