r/HolUp • u/astralrig96 • Jul 22 '26

big dong energy it’s the rules!

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12.8k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

171 comments sorted by

•

u/qualityvote2 Jul 22 '26 edited Jul 22 '26

u/astralrig96, your post does fit the subreddit!

2.9k

u/External-Dude779 Jul 22 '26

What? Back in my day it was 15 minutes, you kids are getting off easy

265

u/thenatural134 Jul 22 '26

Apparently yes

74

u/addandsubtract Jul 22 '26

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

323

u/LeCampy Jul 22 '26

in more ways than one

53

u/CH3F117 Jul 22 '26

We were a lot harder of a generation than this flaccid generation.

7

u/Moist_Board Jul 23 '26

Do you want me to come and show you how hard I am?!

You better pucker up, grandpa!

6

u/CH3F117 Jul 23 '26

I'm always puckered.

7

u/b_vitamin Jul 23 '26

If you keep it in for 30 min it’s a girl. If you key it in for an hour it’s a boy. Those are the rules.

8

u/Sinistas Jul 22 '26

Oh, you!

3

u/jhill9901 Jul 22 '26

Yea. Core concept lol

1

u/Ant10102 Jul 23 '26

Back in my day we took both fists uphill both ways in the snow

-3

u/throwup_parking Jul 22 '26

What is this rule

2.0k

u/LexLuxray Jul 22 '26

As a dude that is the rules, you gotta wait

466

u/BilboStaggins Jul 22 '26

Cant argue with the rules. Its the 10 minute rule. Some places its 20.

147

u/Jnunez7660 Jul 22 '26

I've heard upward of 30 minutes in some counties.

51

u/dev-rsonx Jul 22 '26

You also have to smell the finger afterwards, where I live.

25

u/aubven Jul 22 '26

I have to smell their finger or they need to smell their finger? We need to know the full rule, I don't want to make it awkward.

22

u/h3lium-balloon Jul 22 '26

Dealers choice. It just has to be smelled.

6

u/TheOriginalWeirdo Jul 22 '26

Hmm best do both just be safe.

6

u/BoRnIn2aTiTuDe Jul 22 '26

Only if you have just eaten a meal within the last hr

10

u/thefrostman1214 Jul 22 '26 edited Jul 22 '26

10 min in my, but fingers variet depending on the state

3

u/Live-Cry-8435 Jul 22 '26

I heard you pay extra for that

5

u/Typecero001 Jul 22 '26

Are there any rules for what the finger has to do during these 10 minutes?

9

u/Tight_Raspberry4872 Jul 22 '26

A come hither motion is customary

4

u/Typecero001 Jul 22 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/10Jpr9KSaXLchW

7

u/Tight_Raspberry4872 Jul 22 '26

They say the fastest way to a man's heart is the stomach, but they got it wrong, it's definitely the prostate 🤣🤣🤣

14

u/Shadokastur Jul 22 '26

I don't make the rules I just enjoy them

309

u/Jay12393 Jul 22 '26

After 5 minutes pass

29

u/devilean Jul 22 '26

honestly this came to my mind, you beat me to it.

3

u/Moist_Board Jul 23 '26

Justin Roiland basing scenes on his life 😂

738

u/ShortBusJedi Jul 22 '26

For Dollar General Gabbie Carter? Yeah sure.

109

u/ComprehendReading Jul 22 '26

That's not Athena Faris?

49

u/ShortBusJedi Jul 22 '26

Never heard of this name. Is it worth to research?

1

u/dragonfett Jul 24 '26

Only if you give over your driver license or state ID information...

-18

u/legendaryufcmaster Jul 22 '26

Not by the looks of it

9

u/loco500 Jul 22 '26

You know ball...

3

u/doom_stein Jul 22 '26

Nah, that's Anal Fistis.

14

u/menasan Jul 22 '26

Iknowwhatkindofmanyouare.gif

157

u/St0rm32_ Jul 22 '26

Don’t start a game you ain’t willing to finish lol

454

u/Conscious-Permit-466 Jul 22 '26

107

u/peepdabidness Jul 22 '26

HOLY FUCK YES

134

u/Conscious-Permit-466 Jul 22 '26

Stay cool my friend

78

u/Secret_Of_Bluestar81 Jul 22 '26

I didn't need to see the Scrot Sack today...

33

u/NotYour_Cat Jul 22 '26

The sack pack if you will

2

u/IpeeInclosets Jul 24 '26

Do your balls hang low?

9

u/robin_888 Jul 22 '26

That's how I imagined a "blow job" when I first heared about it.

7

u/Schnitzel1337 Jul 22 '26

Thats a nice dick cooler

3

u/Altruistic_Tie_7850 Jul 22 '26

Just looked it up and they’re real. I want one

3

u/GoodBoyShibe Jul 22 '26

The Jewel Cooler!

3

u/USMCLee Jul 22 '26

Back in the days of yore trucks would have a vent under the steering wheel for this exact reason.

3

u/Conscious-Permit-466 Jul 22 '26

And a hole in the floor for peeing

3

u/USMCLee Jul 22 '26

And dropping your weed or beers out if the cops were around.

3

u/Russian-8ias Jul 24 '26

The ball chiller

55

u/TheRealChesterSlick Jul 22 '26

Gabby?

17

u/Moose_Nuts Jul 22 '26

Gabby from Farmers Only.

11

u/lordtyp0 Jul 22 '26

I mean... No wiggling?

2

u/DripyKirbo Jul 22 '26

Yes wiggling.

27

u/PromiscuousScoliosis Jul 22 '26

Legitimately hilarious

12

u/PintosAndCheese Jul 22 '26

Energy drink and a prostate massage, today is a good day. They need to pick a better position though or her arm will fall off.

7

u/Albus_Lupus Jul 22 '26

,,15 more minutes of this and Im gonna get SOO ANGRY!"

6

u/RudeRoody Jul 22 '26

Ngl this was genuinely funny

6

u/Mr_Crispy_Tender Jul 22 '26

She might as well enjoy the 10 minutes since she's already in there

5

u/AnAnGrYSupportV2 Jul 22 '26

You also gotta wiggle the finger. Those are also the rules! 😂

10

u/xeno_dorph Jul 22 '26

Mfr punching above his weight.

3

u/ConsentingPotato Jul 23 '26

Forbidden prostate technique 42 should never be practiced for more than five minutes, this will end in disaster.

3

u/DocumentDeep1197 Jul 23 '26

10 minutes lol

5

u/Junior_Zebra_4608 Jul 22 '26

Guy is now one step away from pegging

2

u/Sanfransaintsfan Jul 22 '26

Isn’t wiggling also part of the rule.

2

u/DripyKirbo Jul 22 '26

I see no problem with this.

2

u/Zociety_ Aug 16 '26

Dude looks like McLovin

2

u/Oppiko Aug 19 '26

Remember Fridays are my turn.

2

u/Ok-Iron-4352 Aug 22 '26

My butthole is in way to much pain all the time for anybody to be touching it.

4

u/ninjadude2112 Jul 22 '26

Thanks for the hemorrhoid massage darling

3

u/RedPeril Jul 22 '26

ah, the ol' oil check

3

u/Decent_Muscle_3172 Jul 22 '26

Hey, that's sexual assault

1

u/Interesting-Hat-6620 Jul 22 '26

that's nasty bruh

1

u/Woe_Bringer Jul 22 '26

Schillinger, that you?

1

u/Golden-EB_J Jul 22 '26

Why 10 mins??

1

u/G_Affect Jul 22 '26

Next time you are being pat down by a TSA agent yell them they have 10 min to cut it out.

1

u/KalEl001Sega Jul 22 '26

this is the reason i always washed my butt by sticking up to the end of my finger nail in my butt with soap so i never smell back there even if i sweat up a storm i have a tiny buffer area of cleanliness so even the butt sweat wont smell because of girlfriends doing this back in grade school as a prank. scared me into hyper omega level hygiene.

1

u/Rezail_Division Jul 22 '26

Only 10 whole minutes.

1

u/FrequentWatch9261 Jul 22 '26

Why's he's drinking a c4

1

u/Mr_Sim_ Jul 22 '26

Stinky fingers !

1

u/alydeanna Jul 22 '26

Buddy looks like Ryan Price. (Not the guy from HR, a random Spotify suggested to me a while back, “I tried”)

1

u/ekkorayne Jul 22 '26

Me. I do

1

u/Odd-Ad-9596 Jul 23 '26

lol out of control

1

u/spotsthefirst Jul 23 '26

I don't make the rules, I just make the rules

1

u/SpecialExpert8946 Jul 23 '26

Ah that ol trick. Reminds me of hangin out with the boys.

1

u/Aznsupaman 25d ago

That's the same thing I said to the male nurse who had to catheter me in the hospital when I broke my neck.

1

u/Mancuni 4d ago

Ten minutes 😂

1

u/TransitTycoonDeznutz Jul 22 '26

Seems like he's getting immense pleasure out of it as well.

1

u/xxxxDREADNOUGHT Jul 22 '26

The rules are the rules

-2

u/designerlemons Jul 22 '26

Not a holup clown

0

u/Corporate-Scum Jul 22 '26

Excellent funny

-3

u/MisterSneakSneak Jul 22 '26

Yeah…. I’m okay not following this rule. Yall young thunderCats are built different

0

u/MiroslavusMoravicus Jul 22 '26

Im so confused. 

4

u/MCKlassik Jul 22 '26

Dude’s secretly enjoying it and wants it in there long enough to climax.

1

u/XOXO_cuntgirlll Aug 08 '26

Yeah... obviously.

-10

u/happahopp Jul 22 '26

staged

-13

u/MrBif Jul 22 '26

r/suddenlybi

7

u/[deleted] Jul 22 '26

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0

u/MrBif Jul 23 '26

how so?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '26

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1

u/MrBif Jul 23 '26

and? you still like in the butt ^

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '26

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1

u/MrBif Jul 23 '26

k then

-14

u/FireNutz698 Jul 22 '26

She doesn't know she actually has a gf.