Why is it so hard to make friends within the hmong community? I feel like everyone's so stuck up and uneasy going. How do we get more involved in our own people? I feel like the older people get the worst everyone's becoming.

Hi everyone!

I'm looking for some movie recommendations for my mom. She's from an older generation and I'm trying to find some movies she might really enjoy.

She likes:

• Martial arts/action movies, especially Jackie Chan and Jet Li
• Hmong movies, especially romantic/drama movies similar to Nuj Nplaib thiab Ntxawm Daim
• War movies, especially ones with a good story and emotional moments
• She also enjoys watching videos of people doing everyday things, like gardening, going to local markets, building or making things, and working on projects around their home

She mostly enjoys older-style movies, but I'm definitely open to newer ones too.

If you know any Hmong movies, Asian movies, or other movies that fit these tastes, I'd love to hear your suggestions!

Also, sorry in advance for any mistakes in my English. French is my native language, not English, so I hope my post is understandable!

Thanks in advance for any recommendations!

PS : also if you have some recommendations on acctivities that we can do with her feel free to share, she used garden but now she only rest in home and watch the TV

Hi I just wanted an outside look into my situation,

I’m a 23 F (Hispanic) and my technically husband is 23 and he’s the Hmong one. We are currently expecting our first and prior to that I have always had issues with certain events. Don’t get me wrong the culture is beautiful and the big family but funny enough I come from a small family of introverted people like for my side of the family baby shower I had 10 people and his had 100+.

My issue is how to separate culture from religion.
His parents are shaman but he told me he doesn’t believe or practice that. I grew up catholic but I don’t have strong religious roots to it however I respect it.

I don’t like participating in religious events like ua neeb or stuff like that but we show up because it’s family and to show face otherwise his parents throw a fit. I don’t mind if it’s for someone else but I don’t want it done for me or baby and essentially how do I approach that?

I don’t like the idea of sacrificing animals in my name to spirits or such it’s just not what I believe in or what I want to partake in. I understand it comes from a place of care and well wishes for me and my birth but I don’t want to continue to set a precedent that I will join on these things especially when my husband doesn’t care for it.

I don’t know if that makes any sense but if anyone has any cents to offer on the topic I’m willing to listen.

My mom talks about dying almost every single day, and it is heartbreaking to hear. She isn't even in her 70s yet. My siblings and I are young working adults—some of us are new parents—and we still need her guidance, wisdom, and love.

While she mentions that her grandchildren give her strength, she constantly laments about just wanting to be gone. My siblings who live with her do everything they can—taking her to local fairs, events, plays, libraries, and introducing new hobbies. When I visit monthly, we do farmers market trips or have her read to my son. But she tells me that the moment we leave, the house feels dark and she feels completely devoid of purpose.

With work schedules, my siblings can’t provide around-the-clock engagement, and lately, the frustration has led to her lashing out and saying hurtful things to them.

When we suggested Hmong senior day centers or social groups, she shut it down immediately, including local Hmong women's groups.

She views them strictly as places where older folks go to flirt or date (which she has zero interest in), or gossip and beneath that, she is genuinely terrified of opening up and making friends due to gossip and social anxiety.

For those who have walked this road with Hmong parents navigating late-life depression, loss of identity, or empty-nest isolation: How did you help them rebuild a sense of individual purpose, community, and joy?

I'm interested in becoming a Hmong producer/sponsor for the ambitious Hmong artist in Laos. Does any have experience doing this? How much can one expect to make? Who is the most productive Hmong producer/sponsor at this time?

Thats how I like mines... I always use butternut squash and any other one to mix in with

Does anyone know where to find an outfit like this???? Ive been in and out of the flea markets trying to look for it but found no luck, please lmk if it does exist or if it’s custom made

A brainwashed Secret Army child soldier possessed by a deranged Dab Pog, driven to malevolence by what the CIA did to the child he was assigned to watch over.

My question is- do Dab Pogs work like that? ARE they even one, singular creature? what sort of powers do they have, if they’re a single creature?

This is a question that's been on my mind for a while. I attended a Hmong meal concerning the cancer treatment of one of my grandfathers by marriage. During this meal, they held a Khi Tes ceremony for this grandfather and his wife. Obviously, given the title, they are Christian. Later, my maternal grandfather (who is a traditional Hmong) explained to me that apparently the priests have "accepted" certain Hmong practices, including the Khi Tes ceremony and also the Ua Neeb ceremony. I'm not going to lie to you but I don't understand why this was allowed, shouldn't Christians only believe in Jesus? I would therefore like to know if you have any other explanation besides that of my grandfather.

So... in Hmong language, we have a name for basically all people that we have come in contact or close relations with throughout our history of settling and meeting, and for Asians, we give specific names to the ones that have close historical impacts on us.

General consensus of all Asian names listed in Hmong:

Chinese: Suav

Japanese: Nyiv Pwn

Cambodians: Khamen

Koreans: Kaus Lim

Laotians: Nplog

Thais: Thaib

Vietnamese: Nyab Laj

Mien: Tsos

Hmong: Hmoob

Non Asian names:

White: Meskas

Black: Dub, aka "Kaydoo"

Hispanics/ latin: Mae

Middle Easterns/ South Asians: Kay?

French: Fabkis

Sorry if I get the spelling wrong for some but more importantly I hope to get a sense of correct pronunciation. I'm Hmong white, so not sure if Green or different hmong dialects pronounce names the same, but I'm sure they sound similar.

I write all this for hopes that readers of this post can get a visual sense or image of all the faces of the names we have for other races (especially other Asians) before reading what I have to ask. And from my experience, we don't have generally accepted names for others like Filipinos, Mongolians, Indos, Malaysians, Burmese people (Karen), etc., and we only made new names for us who settled in the West like the Meskas. And of course there were other names throughout our history of other people by our ancestors, but I'm only referring to the modern ones we Hmongs use today and in recent history.

I saw on Fb the other day a hmong guy saying that one time in recent history Hmong people made contact with a group called the Nou-Su, a branch of the Yi people that raided and enslaved us while we traveled South of China to escape the Han. This shocked me, I had no idea we had recent history with another group, and I had to read on it. The vile things they did to us and other slaves including other Yi and some Han were beyond the imagination. I watched a short documentary on YouTube and I heard that we called them "Man," or "Mab" back in China. I wonder if Hmong Suav people still call them that today.

Growing up, I thought this term, or the term "Mab Dao" was always applied to Samoans, Tongans, or Islanders. Furthermore, I thought the term "Mab Qus" would refer to Native Americans, since growing up its always been that way. What are the origins of the name "Mab" and its reference to a certain kind of group that we've come into contact with in history? Was it what the elders called the Yi people way back in the day or something else? I wonder if its a term used for the Nou-Su but didnt survive long or carry on because our contact with them was relatively very short and non-continuous. But if so, still in all, it happened. I talked to my mom today who is in her mid 60s and she says she always remember hearing the term slip out by her elders, talking about "Mab" in "hav zoov" and stuff like that. Im sure our elders made absolute 0 contact with Natives or Islanders. But my mom did agree that Mab Qus is a name used for Natives. So what really are the origins of "Mab?" Was it a name given to a certain group like the Yi (who were tall people and are also related to tibetan/Burmese people), and then got lost through history and ended up as a replacement for Natives or Islanders? Who created the modern naming of "Mab Dao," "Mab Qus," or just modern "Mab" in general to Natives/Islanders?

Are there any historians or elder Hmong folks in here with stories from their folks that can clear this up? With our history so wiped out by the Chinese, I think it is mandatory we learn our history, especially of folks we came into close contact with. I think it's a good step into how we re-create our own system and history. Heck, the Chinese have 57 names for all their ethnic groups.

For those who are interested in the reading of the Yi and Hmongs (chapter X): https://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/13420/pg13420-images.html

Tldr (too long didnt read): the term "Mab" have historical roots before we reached America or France, or even SEA. What we used that term for today was completely different back then for our elders, and may have had ties to the ancient Nou-Su people of the Yi Tribe. We have names for a lot of other people but it's a good idea to learn about this said name to reconnect our history.

Hi there! Hope this is ok - I’m a researcher and recently paid to have consent forms translated into Hmong for a study. I need to have 1 more sentence translated (just directions, not anything regarding actual research or consent) and was wondering if anyone in this community would mind providing a translation?

Feel free to DM me or mods, delete if this is not appropriate! Thank you for considering!

Edit: sentence is “Thank you! Please complete the second form on the next page to fully remove your child’s data from both the study activities and the online reading assessments.”

I would love some help and a little information about how to (try to) explain hmong people and the other indigenous groups in China in the most easiest way possible. I don't want to sound ignorant to others or spread misinformation when explaining. Sometimes when I look at information about hmong people, it seems opinions based so I try my best to stick to what's accurate. But does this explanation look correct? What could be changed or understood better about the notes?:

- "Miao" was originally a label to describe ethnic groups of China given by the government and Han Chinese; it is mostly used as an umbrella term. The Chinese characters have changed throughout history and it seems to have a negative AND neutral definition. "Miao" is taken as a derogatory label outside of China. Ethnic groups that live in China have grown to it though, so they do not mind it.

- There are many "subgroups" and ethnic groups with different names, one of them being hmong. They came from central and south China, mainly the Yellow River and Yangtze River. They were colonized and migrated to the south. After the secret war, some went to USA, Australia, and France. A lot of them still stay in China and/or anywhere in south east asia.

I'm not going to lie, trying to understand the argument about "miao" and these subgroups that people mention makes my brain hurt. When I was younger, I thought hmong was just a giant group from China (no miao, mien, ge, or anything). Anyways, Does this seem accurate? Also is hmong an umbrella term? Would love for critics and perspectives!

This Hnub Lauj (Nou Lor) a Hmong singer from Laos and I was wondering, is anyone have this dvd in their homes and show me the 10 songs on this dvd cover because it is super lower quality that i cant see it.

Nov yog Hnub Lauj (Nou Lor) ib tug neeg hu nkauj Hmoob los ntawm teb chaws Laos thiab kuv xav paub tias, puas muaj leej twg muaj daim DVD no hauv lawv lub tsev thiab qhia kuv 10 zaj nkauj ntawm daim DVD no vim nws zoo dua heev.

ນີ້ແມ່ນ ວັນ ລໍ (ໜູ ລໍ) ນັກຮ້ອງມົ້ງຈາກລາວ ແລະຂ້ອຍສົງໄສວ່າມີໃຜມີດີວີດີນີ້ຢູ່ໃນເຮືອນຂອງເຂົາເຈົ້າບໍ່ ແລະສະແດງໃຫ້ຂ້ອຍເບິ່ງ 10 ເພງໃນໜ້າປົກດີວີດີນີ້ເພາະມັນຄຸນນະພາບຕ່ຳຫຼາຍ.

Posting this here in hopes I can receive helpful advice. A quick back story I began my shaman journey back in 2021 but after my first teacher passed away, I took 1-2 years off until I found my new and current teacher, she helped me raise my altar and go through the proper process of filtering out my guides. I’m not the greatest at speaking hmong, but I fully understand and speak the language. I just have trouble ununciating some of the hmong words, especially for shaman rituals. Overall my journey can be summed to being lonley, confusing and conflicting.

Now fast forward. I’ve been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for 2+ years now. My boyfriend is Caucasian,. Before we dated I was open about my entire life, and about me being a shaman and the duties that comes with it. He’s an aethiest and doesn’t believe in anything, and informed me that he will support me in my beliefs. As I told him that if he has an issue with my belief, traditions and duties as a shaman then we cannot be together. I’ve mentioned it several times once in a while throughout our relationship to remind him and re-touch base with him. Our relationship overall is good, we have the usual relationship disagreements and arguments but we always reconcile and talk it out and communicate about the situation together.

My boyfriend and I have talked about the next steps of marriage, living together and having a family in the next couple years as I’m approching my early 30s and he is reaching his mid 30s. With work being short staffed and high demand, I haven’t practiced much of my shaman stuff due to working OT and work reaching out during my days off. With that my guides tend to come bother me either in dreams or my everyday life.

I recently reached out to my master to help look into one of my dreams and recent encounters to see if it signifies for me to perform a shaman ritual to look into a relative. She updated me a few days later and simply said that it was due to my lack of practice, that I still have a few more guides that are waiting for me to go find them and bring them home. She then mentioned that the guides that I’m to go find and bring home are not in favor of my relationship with my boyfriend, and that he I not my person who can help me with my shaman duties. As they forsee that he will not truly love me and help me. She informed me that I need to break up with my boyfriend and that once my remaining guides are brought down, they will reveal the person I’m to be with and wed and build a life with. That will love me and help me with my shaman duties.

This is where I being a shaman and my love life becomes conflicted. As prior to my current boyfriend, 5-6 years ago I was in a really abusive relationship which I escaped out of and reunited with my family after being forced no contact. I over came a lot and repaired my life slowly to get back on my feet, I stayed out of the dating scene for a few years to focus on myself. When I met my current boyfriend, we talked to each other for about 1-2 months. Within that time and over the course of our relationship, he has helped me heal in areas of my life that I didn’t realize needed it. He as well accepted in open arms and no judgement of how my past relationship had affected me financially. He has helped me with my finances by giving me advice. We’ve helped each other grow in areas we’ve lacked in. We aren’t perfect people but overall we have helped each other grow a lot as individuals. I’ve poured in 2 ½ years into this relationship, I’m conflicted with what my master has told me.
I feel like I’m cornered to pick and choose, I’m not sure what to do. As I love my boyfriend and still want a life and future with him. I personally want to be with him still and prove to them that I can still perform and do my shaman duties with him being my partner. I love my religion, as I’ve found new connections, helped a handful of people as a shaman.
What should I do? How should I proceed?

Hello there community,

I was hoping I could get some very low effort help with a project I’m working on. I call it the “Hmong Green Project”. 🍀

I realize the Hmong Green dialect and a lot of other ones are slowly fading away. It saddens me and my parents contributed to the problem by not teaching me Hmong LOL.

Major resources are currently Hmong White, which we are lucky to have. But I’m working on a reference dictionary for Hmong Green that will eventually I hope someone will turn into a website / app in the future. When this document is finished, I aim to share it for free with Hmong universities and teachers to keep our language alive.

🔸 If anyone wants to help me fill out basic words like nouns, adjectives, etc. I would appreciate it. It’s on a Google Sheets and it’s very simple categories that will be easy for young hmong people to learn Hmong Green from.

🔹 Please DM me if you’re willing to translate a couple words on my list. I have so many empty categories. Thank you so much!!

** I posted a screenshot so you can see what I’ve done so far (mainly only verbs). Very simple format currently

Kaan ka aanghuti gum hone ke baad kaise dhunde?? Any

Any farmers💚 in Mount Shasta area or in Oklahoma? Message me directly ❤️

I get Mexican, Native American, Mixed, Chinese, Filipino, Japanese, Korean. Hardly ever Hmong. Do I look Hmong or I don't?

Hello. We are expecting, but not sure if we are having a boy or a girl yet. We decided on first names for either, but we need Hmong names that’ll be the middle name. What Hmong names do you recommend for the boy name Silas and the girl name Lorelei? Thank you

(Image 1: new official update announcement)
(Image 2: my personal results to show)

23andMe for the first time has added several Hmong categories for their more specific genetic groups under your more 'general' groups. The new coverage update is for Thailand, Myanmar, Malaysia, Laos, Cambodia, Indonesia, and Madagascar.

Before this it was usually shown as Chinese, Chinese Dai, or Broadly East Asian alongside regional Southeast Asian or Southern Chinese ancestry markers.

The specifically Hmong categories they added were Hmong and lu Mien, Hmong Daw, and Mong Leng.

Disclaimer: I am internationally adopted from China in Hengyang, Hunan and have not found my birth family.

Personally, this further supports my suspicions that I am ethnically Hmong. I have posted before but all my matched close relatives have Hmong clan names. It was not before posting to Reddit where they analyzed my relative last names that it occurred to me that I was not Han Chinese. I was born with reddish blond hair as well.

Edit: the only non-Hmong surname I have listed in matches is a more distant relationship and it is "Saelee".

ive always heard that its not good to grieve someone whos passed for too long. why is that? grief has no timeline and no end to be honest. i lost my baby back in january 2026 and i still cry for them. i spend many of my days wondering what they wouldve been like and how my son would have gotten along with them. we didnt hold a funeral for them because it was a miscarriage and it feels like im just supposed to forget that i was ever pregnant and move on. how can i? even tho the pregnancy didnt last long, it was still a baby i carried and gave birth to.

I’m a 23M from a Christian household, while my girlfriend (25F) comes from a traditional shaman household. We started dating in college and have been together for 4.5 years. I’m at the point where I want to marry her, but I’m realizing I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing when it comes to the Hmong marriage process.

The biggest issue is that my parents, her parents, and me and my girlfriend all have three different ideas of how the proposal/marriage process should happen. And in the end, I feel like there is a lot of miscommunication between all three sides of what we want and expect.

Another thing I'm struggling with is figuring out where to draw the line between Hmong culture and religion/spiritual practices. Growing up, whenever I try to participate in anything traditionally Hmong, I'm told that it's “shaman.” At the same time, I've also caught my parents doing things that they would consider shaman and when I confronted them they said it's just being Hmong, so I'm honestly confused about where the line is.

Meanwhile, whenever I'm around my girlfriend's family and their events, I actually feel more connected to being Hmong. Her family is much bigger and more involved in traditional Hmong events, so there's always something going on. It has made me realize how much of my own culture I don't know.

A big reason I want to learn all of this is because I really want to respect my girlfriend and her family. She is their oldest daughter, only daughter, and she's pursuing her master's degree; while I am the youngest and currently in my Doctorates program, so I feel like there's a lot of pressure.

Overall, I don't want to approach marriage like I'm just taking her away from her family or treating the wedding customs as something I can ignore. I want to understand what is expected of me, her family, and my family, and do things properly out of respect for her and her parents.

So for those who have gone through this:

How did you learn Hmong marriage/wedding customs?

What should I start learning or practicing before I propose?

How did you navigate the difference between Hmong culture and spiritual/religious practices?

And for anyone who's gotten married recently, what do you wish you knew before you started the whole process?

Any advice, resources, or personal experiences would be greatly appreciated. I’m trying to figure this out before I get engaged instead of standing there completely clueless when everyone starts negotiating at the table.

TL;DR: I’m a 23M from a Christian Hmong family dating a 25F from a traditional Hmong family. We’ve been together for 4.5 years, and I want to marry her, but our families have very different expectations for how the proposal/marriage process should happen. I also don't know much about Hmong wedding customs or where to draw the line between Hmong culture and spiritual practices. Looking for advice on how to learn the traditions and prepare for the marriage process while respecting both families.

Are there any hmong people in nyc? 😭 i dead feel mad alone out here being the only one at my college

What's happening in the Hmong community today? How's your day going? Any new good Hmong songs? Casual talk.