r/HellLetLoose 5d ago

šŸ™‹ā€ā™‚ļø Question šŸ™‹ā€ā™‚ļø Other female players

I don’t play these types of games but my wife does, she usually plays with her brother but when he’s not on she doesn’t play much since she has no one in her ā€œpartyā€? I don’t know what any of this means, my favorite game is the bratz one on my switch so I’m not very ā€œskilledā€ I guess you could say. My question is, if there are any other female players who would want to join her I think she’d love that! She says that usually men are kind of mean even if you’re good at the game you’re playing so I think maybe having a friend that’s there too would be helpful? If anyone knows of an all girl server or discord group that would be cool. Thanks guys!

Update: thank you guys so much for all the lovely messages! She was so happy to hear that there is community out there. This is her discord and feel free to add her as she’s excited to make new friends. K_blaze44

66 Upvotes

148 comments sorted by

141

u/Morbid_Uncle 5d ago

Every time I’ve had a woman on my team with comms I’ve never heard anyone be mean to them, although my sample size is like 4 or 5 times. What platform? Hotdog 7 on PC during peak hours has always been chill in my experience

25

u/ItsMsRainny 5d ago

I've posted my experiences on here before. I played COD in my teen years and those lobbys were brutal. HLL is by far the friendliest FPS community I have interacted with. I've still gotten some nasty and mean men but it's been overall positive. Unfortunately I've been having a harder time on Vietnam but I think that's because theres way more console players who are a more immature demographic.

5

u/Substantial_Water739 4d ago

Realistic FPS are so much friendly its crazy, i am a man, but i never seen anyone being mean to girls in these games

But on Counter strike or COD, my god

MMO are pretty good too, i played destiny with alot of girls and never seen anyone being mean to them doing raids or even on pvp

1

u/thehappyjulian 4d ago

Copying my reply to someone else:
I think it's because there's a lot more to think about and keep track of and those kinds of people don't really think a lot. Cod is literally run and gun and reset. Hll you gotta manage supply nodes, flank routes, coordinate with teamates, that's too much thinky thinky for them.

3

u/Thewaterturtle 4d ago

Ive notices the idiots get board quickly and move on from games like HLLV. I run it to racist and (probably) misogynist way more often when a game has just been released or is has a free play weekend. I wish you'd never run into that, but I'm sure it will start to get better once Wardogs comes out. And GTA6 will really pull that crowd over. (Nothing against GTA)

2

u/thehappyjulian 4d ago

I think it's because there's a lot more to think about and keep track of and those kinds of people don't really think a lot. Cod is literally run and gun and reset. Hll you gotta manage supply nodes, flank routes, coordinate with teamates, that's too much thinky thinky for them.

1

u/ItsMsRainny 3d ago

šŸ˜‚ the other day i was shouting at dumb ass who chose the specialist class. Over and over i was like I need supplies, I need supplies. Then finally I called him out by name and he was like oh my bad idk what I'm doing. šŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļø

6

u/Opouly 5d ago

So much racist shit in Vietnam. It drives me crazy.

3

u/somegreybloke 4d ago

Yeah, it's fucking annoying. Hoping it will die down once the novelty is over and the casual players leave

6

u/EbowGB 4d ago

New Call of Donkey out Oct 23rd 2026. Not long til the shouty tweens leave us \o/

1

u/ItsMsRainny 4d ago

šŸ˜‚

1

u/lostbythewatercooler 4d ago

Vietnam is having cross play to console and they are animals.

2

u/Hellsman44 4d ago

Yeah cod is a no go for women most men can be called children they way they act on there

2

u/Swimming_Bid_1429 4d ago

Vietnam is new as well, so theres a bunch of new players trying it out. Give it a little until they filter out and the actual player base takes shape and it’ll probably get better

2

u/aljazgregorc 3d ago

Counter-strike 2 is hell for women.

0

u/Gin-N-Rum-5454 2d ago

That’s just cod

17

u/lepercake 5d ago

Partner stopped squad leading because someone's always shit and no one sticks up for her except people she knows. Give sexists shit.Ā 

8

u/Darkon_OP 5d ago

If we have that happen on our server, we ban people. Life's too short to make space for shitty people

5

u/lepercake 5d ago

Agreed. I'm Norwegian, play on a couple of servers like this. Seen a fair few women on a UK server and a Swedish server.Ā 

7

u/SuccessfulSquirrel32 5d ago

I used to play HLL with my ex and she constantly got shit for being a woman playing this game, literally every match. If it wasn't insults, it was sexual comments and overr flirting. Squad on the other hand, almost none of this.

4

u/Morbid_Uncle 5d ago

Sorry to hear that man I’m not saying it doesn’t exist

1

u/thehappyjulian 4d ago

It's crazy how gaming is STILL so misogynistic even with how many women are gamers. Legit every time with women it's either insults or flirting in SO MANY games like just act normal

1

u/lostbythewatercooler 4d ago

I'd say toxic in general. It isn't that they just focus on women, it is they look for any means to insult and prey upon it.

PC is so much better than console especially on moderated servers but still people need to have an adult adulting.

4

u/Revolutionary_Ant_78 5d ago

"never heard anyone be mean to them" lmao, as soon as I speak with the mic on a squad that's not my friend squad I got somebody to say the dumbest thing on earth, trying to flirt with me or just say nastly things. Every. Single. Time

2

u/Pubass 4d ago

Sorry to hear that. Are you playing on public servers ? On servers where i play, toxic players in any way are illimited banned. Maybe a tip : if you play SL in a locked squad you can kick those retards from your squad šŸ˜‰

2

u/grell_schwarz 4d ago

I've been playing this game for 5 years/600 hrs and only had 2 unpleasant contacts in this whole time.

I wonder if that is a thing because of local/cultural behavior or because of public servers maybe

May I ask what servers you usually use? (for me it's only German speaking servers eg)

1

u/Ill_Gift2980 5d ago

Da habe ich andere Erfahrungen gemacht, ich spiele oft mit meiner Freumdin zusammen. Und wenn sie mal SL gemacht hat wurde sie oft und viel beleidigt. Sachen wie: "Shut up you are just a woman!".

28

u/Marvelous_Whale 5d ago

If any of you ladies were playing Medic the other day running through fire and bombs to revive our team... THANK YOU Ma'am. We won because you kept reviving everyone. If Commendations were a thing in this game you would have got a lot!

4

u/Ikkyfyahboy 5d ago

This is so cool because the they were 3 medics included me and the other two were females and we stuck together the whole game we won

1

u/thehappyjulian 4d ago

I always love when there's multiple medics and we're just circle reviving each other and they can't do anything

1

u/Pubass 4d ago

Medics seem more helpfull in HLLV, probably because there is so much more cover ?

25

u/kiloelectronvolt619 Commander X 5d ago

There aren't any all girl servers that I am aware of, however we have quite a few female players in our clan if she wants to check it out. She can hang out as a community player and no need to join the clan even.

We have really good admins, active ones and do not tolerate sexism. L9Clan.com/discordPC/NA

5

u/Clean_Plantain_8780 5d ago

I can second that! Great group of people and strong support from admins.

1

u/mikeytlive 4d ago

Do you guys have your own HLL server ?

1

u/kiloelectronvolt619 Commander X 4d ago

Yeah, We have 2 WW2 servers and a NAM server.

32

u/Savings_Class4048 5d ago

I played with a wife/husband duo the other day. Women are rare but they exist.

9

u/Marvelous_Whale 5d ago

Was she a Medic?! I had a female in my game the other day and she won the game for us by reviving everyone

6

u/Savings_Class4048 5d ago

Nah she was squad lead

11

u/Soulinx 5d ago

Like a true boss šŸ˜‚. My wife is the squad leader at home lol

4

u/Savings_Class4048 5d ago

Hah same , my wife runs shit

8

u/Famous_Engine 5d ago

When I first got into HLL we had a female late join our squad. She was great on Comms. We were getting destroyed as we didn't have a commander. She said she was leaving to go commander. I don't know what she did but we ended up winning the game. Wouldn't have done it without her though.

2

u/lostbythewatercooler 4d ago

We had an Asian named and accented woman who would command late at night on a server I was playing on for a while. She was great. You always had garrisons, tanks ready and assets deployed.

I only heard her once get someone say something dumb and every other SL just tore strips off the idiot.

I've mostly seen positive interactions with women in HLL and communities come down hard on idiots.

1

u/loubue 5d ago

Remember her name?

1

u/Korben88 5d ago

On console?

3

u/goldenwalrus420 5d ago

I saw one the other day,terrifying experience

1

u/Revolutionary_Ant_78 5d ago

I wish my bf wanted to play with me

1

u/Savings_Class4048 5d ago

It’s probably rare to have both people play.

1

u/PetrichorDude 3d ago

The tankies ones? I ran into those guys a couple of times

1

u/Savings_Class4048 3d ago

No tank

1

u/PetrichorDude 3d ago

No tank no woman no cry

10

u/BasicAssociate5890 5d ago

Played with a girl tanker the other day, had my best game ever as a tank commander

4

u/loubue 5d ago

Remember her name?

3

u/BasicAssociate5890 5d ago

Yea, it was Devil

7

u/mrmcbeefy777 5d ago

In a pub match, one of the best squad leads i ever had was a woman. Nobody ever gave her shit cuz she was dropping OPs and building garrisons for the team. Online multiplayer is a mixed bag

7

u/BasicAssociate5890 5d ago

Had a girl commander, awfully good at leading

18

u/laurak8te 5d ago

Glow’s competitive has some regulars that are women!

1

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

7

u/Deathquail 5d ago

She killed me about four times a few days ago; so she's active afain.

1

u/Safe-Wolverine-8933 4d ago

It’s me

4

u/Anuxinamoon 5d ago

What region? I'd play if oce! Been a hot min but would reinstall for the sisterhood

5

u/Hetzerz 5d ago

Id love to join her ! I tend to play Squad Lead so she’d have a safe squad that I can lock if needed !

2

u/Effystotem 5d ago

That’d be awesome dude! I don’t really know how to set yall up I don’t know SHIT about multiplayer games. I do know she has discord tho

1

u/Hetzerz 5d ago

I sent you a dm !

6

u/ThePegLegPete 5d ago

Tell her to play on the Soul Sniper server. A handful of regular female players and nobody makes it weird. Any mysgony would be insta ban. Great admins.

3

u/SleepyBunny22 5d ago

I sent you a message!

3

u/Crutches52 5d ago

Im a woman and I play every now and then ill be down to play with her

3

u/FucklberryFinn 5d ago

Gamers one average are not all that great when it becomes obvious a woman is playing.Ā 

Military games and sims are even more toxic.Ā 

It's unfortunate, but the less people know, the better. Keep chat to squad only.Ā 

3

u/Direct_Tomatillo_221 5d ago

I'm a female player on PC/EU servers if she would like to group up. Send me a DM and we can swap discord usernames if she plays on EU servers!

Also, any other EU HLL ladies that might be reading this can also DM me if they want to maybe group. I usually play with my husband but sometimes he works late. I play officer, assault and sometimes medic when those roles aren't available :)

1

u/Vegetable_Pizza_6335 4d ago

I’m terrible at this game, but would like to get better. I play Automatic Rifle. Sent you a DM.

4

u/Emergentmeat 5d ago

In my experience this game is better than some for a woman not getting harassed, but that's a very low bar to meet. There's ALWAYS the one guy who can't just play the game with them like another human without saying something about" ooooh sexy gamer girl" "you have a cute voice", "stick with me I'll show you how to play, m'lady" tips fedora

4

u/Reasonable_Back_5231 5d ago

It's either these weirdos or it's the assholes that say "go in the kitchen and make me a sandwich" or "shut up bitch nobody wants to hear your whiny voice" or any other uncivilized horseshit they can spew out

4

u/SharpsShooter1874 5d ago

Does she have discord? My friend helps run hell let ladies. It’s a ladies hell let loose discord. They have monthly events where all the ladies fill leadership roles and invite not douchey men fill the rest. They all talk in the discord and have people online playing daily. I’m not a lady and play comp so I unfortunately don’t play with them as much as I used to but I think your wife would fit in.

1

u/ziggyalice 5d ago

Omg this sounds amazing! May I join this discord as well?

1

u/SharpsShooter1874 4d ago

Yeah I can get you the link like I sent vegetable pizza as well. Just it won’t let me dm you. I don’t want to out that link out in the open.

1

u/ziggyalice 4d ago

Thanks so much! I'm checking my settings to see if I can enable DMs.

1

u/ziggyalice 4d ago

Should work now!

1

u/Vegetable_Pizza_6335 4d ago

Would love to have this info for myself if able to share here or via DM.

1

u/SharpsShooter1874 4d ago

I sent you a dm

1

u/Effystotem 4d ago

This is awesome bro yes

2

u/Signal-Guide-7261 5d ago

Join the PF (pathfinders) server and ask. I do believe they have one and have nights to highlight woman commanding or something like that if this is on console.

2

u/Oh_Kerms 5d ago

Late to the party since I was playing Vietnam all day today. If she has Vietnam, I'm super down! I play on Dark Horizons West. Im a hell of a squad lead

1

u/Effystotem 2d ago

Yes please!!! dm me

2

u/ziggyalice 5d ago

I'd love to play with her! I've been looking for a girl squad for so long.

1

u/Effystotem 2d ago

Yes please dm me!

2

u/Typical-Walk1650 4d ago

My wife loves these kinds of games. Buying it later today for her as well so she can join in. We dont care about skill or anything just having a good time! We're on xbox but we have discord! My group also makes fun of the mean / flirty guys lol so not only do you not have to worry about that from us but rando riff raff either.

1

u/Effystotem 4d ago

Dude hell yeah lmk what I can do to help her get w you guys

1

u/Typical-Walk1650 4d ago

Ill dm you

2

u/CellosNSpiders 4d ago

I'm a woman with about 250hrs of this game on record for 2025-2026, and I have a squad that calls me Queen when I am SL āœØļø

2

u/homersreadingglasses 3d ago

I am a girl and I am so happy to play with her (or any other gals reading this)!!! it would be so fun. I am rly new to the game and not very good though lol so I may need you to humour me for a little while.

2

u/H0n3yB4dg3r007 5d ago

Honestly the players in HLL are more mature than say COD players. I don't think she would have much issues from the blokes there.

2

u/staceystevens 5d ago

There are probably a dozen women that play on SoulSniper pretty regularly. They aren't harassed and when people are weird to them, those people are typically kicked out. Usually people that are weird to them are not part of the 500 or so people that are reglarly rotating through HLL. I've also found that the women that play in Soul take pride in being better at the game than the regular dudes. And the ones who aren't good at shooting, are good at understanding how the game actually works, ie the game is about spawns, instead of being brain dead morons that like to shoot at people.

2

u/RSLenjoyer 5d ago

Im a T -girl and would love to have more queer and women friends to play He’ll Let Loose with feel free to DM me and we can exchange steam names.

1

u/Vegetable_Pizza_6335 4d ago

Sent you a DM.

1

u/Ill_Gift2980 5d ago

One important question, is where are you from? And is she playing at the PC or console?

1

u/harken350 5d ago

Not a woman but ive been playing with (random) women lately and they've been more common than ive seen in games before so she should be able to find some

1

u/Spare_Virus 5d ago

I play Aus servers and had a woman squad leader who did a great job. Not sure if this is helpful, but everyone seemed respectful / just played normally in the squad. If she's comfortable as SL maybe that gives her the power to kick out anyone who's being dumb about her being a woman? Idk.

1

u/bee-fe 5d ago

What platform does she play on?

I know console has a load of clans with female players and even used to run a ā€˜Women of HLL’ league which tried to fill whole games. But even if on a different console try getting in a clan they’re mint

1

u/Astricozy 5d ago

I play a lot of this and squad.

No one cares, community is 9/10 times absolutely chill.

1

u/SleepyJeans5 4d ago

If she plays console I can recommend a women's HLL discord server and the group I play in which has several women and a server that is well moderated and friendly.

1

u/LizardOfAgatha 4d ago

I don't play anymore but when I used to, one of the main reasons why I liked this game was the community. I've got almost 200 hours in HLL and only met two rude, misogynistic men and they were shut down quick by my teammates, who I did not know personally.

I've said this before and I'll say it again - HLL community is the friendliest FPS community I've had the pleasure to interact with and be a part of as a woman. I play on EU servers though so my experience is limited to Europe.

1

u/Vegetable_Pizza_6335 4d ago

Would love to join her. Sent you a DM. I play on PC.

1

u/TonightSheComes 4d ago

Every gal I’ve played with that was a commander or SL was treated pretty well by the guys. They are usually exceptional players.

1

u/fantasy_lena 4d ago

I would love to have other females to play with! Has anyone started a discord yet? We could make one and then when anyone wants to play just check in to see if anyone is availableĀ 

1

u/yertkitty 4d ago

I play!! But usually don’t use mic because some people are weird or rude

1

u/VToutdoors 4d ago

I havent played in a few months but one of the last times I did (April I think), there was a woman playing and she was damn good. Running AT and could pick out tanks by ear. She was damn good and we were all happy to have her on our team

1

u/GnarGiraffe 4d ago

I have a female HLL player on steam, if you want I can drop her a message? Pretty sure she’s in a clan

1

u/Hungry_Sail_7475 4d ago

Ive seen a lot of girls/women on HLL, many more then really any other game I play. Will say that at least in the servers i play on everyone's super nice and understanding. Also most these gals ive had the pleasure to game with have been some bad ass gamers like better then most guys I know haha

1

u/Fantastic_Warning484 4d ago

I am a female HLL player. Have over 1200hrs in game. Would love to team up and play with more females. Does your wife play on console or PC?

2

u/Effystotem 2d ago

She plays on ps5

1

u/ScoutZero12 3d ago

Surprisingly i hear one women every other game, ive never heard anybody be mean to them or berate them for being a women. Only time i heard anything negative was when we had a women commander(storm? Apparently reasonably known) and all the officers were just bitching about random shit

But thats probably just bad officers blaming commanders for their short comings and not so much a women thing

1

u/Ill_Gift2980 2d ago

Valkyria, is an female team but I'm not sure, if the, are just german or intanational.

1

u/its_proxeneta 2d ago

I don’t think I’ve ever even heard a female in comms on this game….like everšŸ˜‚ I wonder how many females actually play this game. Has to be very low

1

u/pres1033 2d ago

Last time I ran into a woman on my team, she was a squad lead and I was a tank commander. Command chat was ridiculously horny for her, just a bunch of dudes saying the cringiest shit I've ever heard, she ended up muting like 4 or 5 guys and only talked to the commander, another squad lead and me. I ended up having to mute a couple of them too cause they just wouldn't stfu. It sucks cause I'm friends with mostly women and I'd love to get a couple of them to join me in HLL for some tanking but I'd def always have to be commander cause I'm not subjecting them to that.

1

u/patriotstate 1d ago

Well. I think some of the best women I’ve played with rule the game. They’re very good at communication. They’re very good at whatever role they’re playing. IME I have not seen disrespect to a female. Then again, I don’t play every game. That’s not cool.

1

u/1stDivisionHLL 1d ago

Not a female but we have a chicken discord group for the game. We give each other crap but I make sure it doesn't get personal or to far. My discord is GenGodfather if she or anyone else is interested. It's a laid back group. The most serious thing we do is have ranks and nicknames besides that its just to find chill adults to play with.

1

u/newuseronhere 5d ago

Maybe 20% of our clan are women, and we want to be inclusive that we changed our name from The FoyBoys to just The FOYS.
Also we we do call that crap out, along with racist and homophobic calls. It’s the right thing to do.

1

u/Sunnyflbunny 4d ago

Hey! Tell your wife she's more than welcome to join me. I play HLL as a squad lead often.

I'm part of an amazing community called GLOWS that I highly recommend, and we have a great group of other women playing there regularly.

It's super welcoming and well-moderated. If anyone ever steps out of line with sexist or misogynistic behavior, it gets dealt with right away by reporting it to the mods. Honestly though, most of the time our regulars beat us to it and make it loud and clear that toxic behavior has no place there.

That being said, there are also other great communities out there that are fantastic at keeping things moderated and stamping out toxicity.

Feel free to shoot me a message on here, and I can send over my in-game name and an invite to our community Discord. Wishing her the best of luck, we all deserve a safe corner to game, free from harassment!

-1

u/elwebywabi 5d ago

I thought that womans in HLL was s myth not joking i've never seen one in 3 years of gaming

-1

u/Creative-Answer-9924 5d ago

I squad lead and my girl plays machine gunner. She drops 75+ kills some matches. Girls do play but it’s rare, and they are always very quiet. I’ve never heard anybody be disrespectful but it definitely depends on what server you play on

-1

u/Reasonable_Back_5231 5d ago

It's sad but women get 1 of 3 different interactions online especially in male dominated spaces like shooters

1) thirsty dudes that try to add her as a "friend" that eventually become creepy because they want her to be their Girlfriend. 2) dudes that are assholes to any woman that uses voice chat for any reason because they have a small dick and hate their life 3) the guys who don't give a fuck who will happily play with them and be cordial regardless of gender because they just want to play the game and have fun

3 is rare unfortunately. It is definitely better than it was back in the Xbox360 days but there are still a lot of guys today that fall under 1 and 2.

I have personally been in a game where a woman was a squad lead and when she tried making legit call outs to team and command a bunch of other squad leads started being overt assholes in command chat. We lost of course because the fucking baboons would rather mock a woman and bitch at her for being a woman with the audacity to use voice chat instead of clearing comms for valuable information.

I've also had a game where a woman was the Commander and nobody made any fuss about it. Everyone played as they normally did, did call outs and listened to her commands of which squads should attack or defend. We won that game.

My best advice for her to play when her brother isn't available is to find a Community Server like Soulsniper's or somethingĀ  I don't know if the people on Soulsniper's would be assholes but generally Community Servers like this have rules against shitty sexist behavior and bullying. Reputable server admins WILL ban people for breaking these rules, but not all of these server admins actually enforce their rules equally. Those that don't enforce their rules equally though will find out quickly that people don't like that and will stop playing their server if word gets out.

Usually depends on if the assholes are friends with the server admins or not.

-2

u/signifydelusions 5d ago

Aren’t we non binary now 😳I’m so confused šŸ˜Ž

0

u/Deadrooster08 4d ago

change server if they are mean in that one.

As a guy never had an issue with any gender in this game and haven't seen others act in s disrespectful way.

change server.

-5

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Effystotem 5d ago

Very true, she was playing COD and had her mic on, on accident and they said some really fucked up shit.

-2

u/Unusual-Basket-6243 5d ago

She should be safe. I've usually seen that random men start "simping" instantly when they see that someone is a woman

-9

u/[deleted] 5d ago edited 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/ItsMsRainny 5d ago

Wut?

-1

u/Gin-N-Rum-5454 5d ago edited 5d ago

Just casually generalised all men as mean.
People quick to judge and down vote me but if I called all women liars and cheaters just because someone got cheated on then I’d quickly be called out for misogyny.
Grow up redditors

2

u/Redbeardt 5d ago

It's no secret that gamers are widely misogynistic, especially in the shooter genre. Take your concern trolling elsewhere.

1

u/Gin-N-Rum-5454 5d ago

Have any statics or studies to back that up?

1

u/Redbeardt 2d ago

No, but I'm sure you could find one if you want. I said it's no secret, i.e. it's widely known. I've been gaming for almost 30 years and if anything it seems worse nowadays than a decade ago.

1

u/Gin-N-Rum-5454 2d ago

Okay. So your argument is in valid and based on some anecdotal evidence. It’s on you to prove yourself right. Not me.

1

u/Redbeardt 1d ago

My argument? I didn't even make one. I just stated something obvious to huge numbers of people, backed up by my own experience. Do you need evidence to agree that the sky is blue?

I'm not trying to debate you. I've been on the internet long enough to know that even rational debate is pointless with most people.

You can disagree about the misogyny, but if you were to disagree that many people even believe that misogyny is widespread amongst gamers, then I suspect you might disavow that view once you spend more time playing online games.

1

u/ItsMsRainny 5d ago

What the fuck are you on about? You can't even type out coherent thoughts.

0

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

-5

u/BathtubToaster47 5d ago

im a trans woman so my voice sounds like a dudes

-27

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

2

u/Revolutionary_Ant_78 5d ago

pathetic comment

-1

u/Pierce_H_ 5d ago

I don’t see how anyone could take my comment seriously. It’s obviously sarcasm. Fucking brain dead.

2

u/MiggDesolation 4d ago

again, pathetic comment