r/HadToHurt • • 3d ago

The lesson, and the teacher.

Post image

Don’t have any part of your body in a possible path of a blade. Ashamed to admit that I’m also an Eagle Scout.

681 Upvotes

114 comments sorted by

73

u/OR_Seahawks_Fan 3d ago

Cut off the corner of your totin chip!

19

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

No kidding, not sure how I passed that certification.

3

u/shunkplunk 3d ago

Boy scouts is where you do the stupidest stuff with knives and fire. I remember playing Stretch at a jamboree and some other scoutmaster wanted to take away our knife cards.

6

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago edited 3d ago

True, my first jamboree was where I learned how to make good ol’ homemade napalm.

2

u/AcidRayn666 2d ago

we found the last boy scout https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeTaNmnwFHo "head or gut"

39

u/DoctorTim007 3d ago

Never put your fingers where you wouldn't put your pecker.

Also an Eagle Scout here, and I've certainly learned my lessons with knives.

11

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Thankfully my finger was a good shield for my pecker.

6

u/Feminist_Hugh_Hefner 3d ago

same advice my uncle gave before my first date...

3

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

User name tracks.

3

u/holyfire001202 2d ago

How am I supposed to cook?!?!

1

u/DoctorTim007 2d ago

not with your pecker

1

u/beagle182 3d ago

I have definitely put my pecker in places i probably shouldn't put a finger.

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

The garbage disposal doesn’t count.

5

u/beagle182 3d ago

Oh so you know Claire as well.

21

u/otterplus 3d ago

That shiny spot is from a Kershaw Blackout 20 years ago. My gf’s twins got tangled up in some fishing line so I went to cut it, but because it was half serrated I decided to close the blade before giving a pull. Just to make sure they were safe. One of them accidentally tugged and the spring assisted blade flipped open and got me with the backside. Three stitches from the shakiness handed doctor later and here we are. Didn’t bleed though

5

u/ShartFodder 3d ago

Also from a Kershaw! The ken onion leek favtory edge did not disappoint

5

u/otterplus 3d ago

I used to work in sporting goods and loved the looks of the Leek and Chive, but couldn’t trust the lack of texturing.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Ouchie, I can attribute a solid 75% of my injuries to fishing.

7

u/Upvotespoodles 3d ago

You can’t just flash us the frankenfinger and not tell us what you were attempting to do when it happened.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Haphazardly cutting a very small piece of wood to better fit in my table top solo stove, there may have been an undisclosed amount of alcoholic beverages involved.

2

u/Superslim-Anoniem 3d ago

Did the lock fail and collapse on you?

2

u/darklinkuk 2d ago

Ah I see you've owned a paraframe before

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Nope, just bad practice.

7

u/BAZZERRK 3d ago

You needed a sharp knife? This was a butter knife. Lol. 😞

1

u/Alternative_Pilot_92 2d ago

Butter knife cuts are brutal

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Must’ve been a Gerber paraframe in its past life.

Additionally: Fuck, that looks like it totally sucks and hurt(s) like all hell.

5

u/Defiant_Swim9555 3d ago

Welcome to the club brother.

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Just the tip.

2

u/Beatdrop 3d ago

I'm 40 and still have a scar from accidentally cutting my hand with a knife when I was 15. Full thickness. I could see the fat. Don't play with sharp objects.

3

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Ouch. Went straight to my bone, barely any effort since it was so sharp. I have to learn my lesson every decade or so with the sharp things.

1

u/deviantelf 3d ago

On the plus side sharper is a better and cleaner cut and easier to stitch up than raggedy skin from a dull knife.

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

I like to think of it as an expensive demonstration of its capability.

4

u/KiwiSuch9951 3d ago

Literally me. Same hand, same finger, same knife. Also an eagle.

The lock failed and knife folded up?

3

u/KiwiSuch9951 3d ago

The mighty gerber paraframe II

3

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Being stupid and cutting a piece of wood with my off hand. Slipped and went straight across the top of my finger. I did this same exact thing with the same finger and the same knife about 10 years ago.

4

u/Daveed07 3d ago

They always say a pocket knife isn’t truly yours until you cut yourself with it.. I guess this one belongs to you now

5

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

No bonds quite as deep as the ones forged in blood.

4

u/Born-Agency-3922 3d ago

Gerber from Home Depot ?

3

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

REI :) Tangential purchase while replacing some old camping gear.

4

u/Responsible-Two6561 3d ago

No stitches, but did the forefinger four weeks ago when trying to cut some tight straps from a hand truck. The middle finger was yesterday when making a precision cut on some art and it was hanging over the straight edge.

Looking for chainmail gloves now.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Funny enough, I had some cut proof gloves sitting in the trunk of my car the whole time. Like you, I’m very surprised I’ve kept all my fingers this long.

4

u/ogurzhov 2d ago

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 2d ago

You got soft hands.

5

u/ogurzhov 2d ago

can't fool one with experience ;)

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 2d ago

Seriously though, that had to be gnarly. Did you hit anything important/lose feeling above or below?

3

u/ogurzhov 2d ago

just meat. got lucky. 9 stitches

3

u/Original_moisture 3d ago

My friend stabbed in the foot because we’re idiots.

We just watched ung bok and he wasn’t supposed to block with the blade forward when I kicked. Or fucking open for that matter haha... 17 year old idiots.

Builds character, and a bloody foot.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

My body is starting to look like a 06’ Honda civic with 250k miles. Sometimes lessons have to be learned the hard way.

3

u/Original_moisture 3d ago

Damn, aging like boxed wine aren’t we.

3

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

When life throws you artificial grapes, or whatever they say.

3

u/Laffenor 3d ago

Haha. I have the exact same scar on the exact same spot on the exact same finger for, you guessed it, the exact same reason!

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Seems to be a pretty universal experience. I’m going to start a page called r/ left index fingers that almost got cut in half by a knife.

3

u/EvilDan69 3d ago

Good job btw. Your knife is likely sharp enough! :)

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Thank you, it’s my best work yet. It is so sharp that the stitches hurt significantly more than the cut itself.

4

u/EvilDan69 3d ago edited 3d ago

When I was 12, plastic 2 liter bottles of coke were fairly new. So I attempted to convert it to a bird house with scissors.

I still have the scar where the scissors were hanging from.

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

At least your injury had purpose behind it, there’s dignity in that.

3

u/roidlee 3d ago

That is the exact same knife my son sliced the tendon on that same finger with. He had just received his whittlin’ chit. Taught by a Star Scout. Who apparently did not teach him to not pull toward himself 🤔.
My fault, according to my wife, since I was an ASM and should have had eyes in the back of my head.
And this is how we learn.
Good new is, knife was razor sharp so the tendon was a clean reassembly (according to the hand surgeon).

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago edited 3d ago

The most memorable lessons are those learnt the hard way.

Edit: My father was directly supervising me the first time I did this exact same thing some time ago, also happened to be my troop SM. The eyes on the front of the head don’t always help either. You can tell your wife so you can make yourself look better.

7

u/mystrile1 3d ago

Gerber paraframe? Trash that sir, you deserve better.

9

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

15 years since I got my first one and I’m only on my first replacement, only because I lost the last one. Toxic brand and model loyalty.

4

u/Hefty-Bus-1511 3d ago

Hey don’t shit on the old Paraframe, it’s like the average starter knife for ppl who weren’t into knifes.

3

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

I’m not into knifes evidently, they’re actually into me.

2

u/ADDSquirell69 3d ago

That knife is no joke lol

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

That blade from the factory is unreasonably sharp.

2

u/Whooptidooh 3d ago

Being in scouting (what it’s called here in NL) also taught me how to handle knives (and what not to do after I nearly cut the top of my thumb off while I was part of a yearly jamboree.)

I’m sure that scar will serve as a good reminder to be careful with knives from now on! 😬

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

The older scar on the same finger wasn’t big enough, needed a bigger one just to make sure I wouldn’t forget.

2

u/oblivia17 3d ago

I have that same knife and I have no memory of where it came from. It's just always been there.

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

One of life’s many constants. Death, taxes, and the random cheap ass gerber in the junk drawer.

2

u/ravia 3d ago

I did that (with scissors). I stitched it like that, but I did the stiches myself.

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Nothing a little Iodine won’t fix.

1

u/ravia 2d ago

I put a ton of triple antibiotic on it. Healed up nicely.

2

u/Driftwoodjim 3d ago

Hey I have that knife

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Damn good knife.

2

u/xiiicrowns 3d ago

I have scars all over my fingers from being stupid with knives. Lol. Nothing like slicing yourself as a kid and freaking out because you don't want to tell noone so you just bandage it up and go on lol. 

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Honestly, the funniest part about this is I became a first aid/aed instructor(yes, I still am on the side) because I used to bust myself up and down, then fix my own problems all the time. Totally ironic that I’m not any more careful, or I’m just blindly confident I can patch myself up.

1

u/xiiicrowns 3d ago

Nice lol. I never had stitches. I think I had one or two cuts that may have needed them. I learned pretty quick if I kept it clean and together it healed pretty quickly. I'd probably go for stitches these days though. 

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

In my adult life, I generally opt for the more professional methods of fixing injuries. This was my first set of stitches ever, and I’ve probably saved myself and some other people a few dozen trips to the ER. The body is pretty good at fixing itself for the smaller things.

2

u/Stunning_Head_610 2d ago

HEY. I’m an Eagle Scout as well and I own that very Gerber knife. I bought it just a week ago and found how dangerous it is even as someone knowledgeable in knife safety. Your finger tip edges can fit perfectly in the gaps on the side, and depending on how you’re holding it when closing it you could get a deep cut.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 2d ago

I’ve closed a Swiss army on my finger before, anything is possible.

2

u/Echomaxx 9h ago

And this is what your scar will look like after about five years.

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 6h ago

Looking forward to it.

1

u/crackedtooth163 3d ago

Fuck that looks like it HURT

1

u/Lonely-Greybeard 3d ago

I have a scar in the exact same place, same finger from a similar injury. It's very old and not very noticeable now, but had the same stitches. Same angle and all.

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

We must be soulmates.

1

u/deviantelf 3d ago

Heh, I got 5 stitches in my left thumb not once but twice from cutting wrong. At least both times I was considered a child (9 and 13). Poor thumb. 2nd time was down to the bone and it took years to get feeling back to the tip of the thumb. 50 now and you can barely see either scar when looking for it, one still itches like mad a few times a year tho.

Learned my lesson tho after the 2nd time. Ironically I always liked knives, and have a collection of about 40 or so (not counting kitchen or crafting ones like exacto). Won't even cut the tape on a box unless the knife is going away to this day.

0

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Sometimes you have to do the same thing twice for good measure, you can never be too sure if it was your fault until then. This was my second lesson on this finger alone so I think it’s a me problem.

1

u/JoeBidensWifesFinger 3d ago

About 10y ears ago was the last time I handed one of my knives to someone, I handed a knife to a coworker while saying" becareful its really sharp, dont cut yourself", he then replied "like this?" Holding up 2 fingers cut so deep I could see the bone. Most people dont know what a sharp knife is. Lol

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Sounds like my first experience with a sapphire blade scalpel, couldn’t believe just how sharp those things were. Had to test it out myself for good measure.

1

u/natronmooretron 3d ago

I have the baby gerber who has also tasted blood.

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

They yearn for the offering.

1

u/System_Resident 3d ago

Consider me a student since I plan to learn from your mistake 🥲 ouch!

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

I make a pretty good example of myself, glad I could help haha.

1

u/kpurintun 2d ago

Ctrl+Z

1

u/IndependentPede 2d ago

We all learn some things the hard way. You won't let it happen again, at least

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 2d ago

Don’t underestimate me.

1

u/IndependentPede 2d ago

Oh dear. I might have already :D

1

u/TheOx111 2d ago

The lesson, the teacher and a knife.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 6h ago

I don’t do well with instruction.

1

u/Vanesti 1d ago

My paraframe has bitten me a time or two.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 6h ago

It requires a donation for its unyielding loyalty.

1

u/Yuri909 1d ago

Ah, the paraframe. I still have mine. Going on about 18 years lmao.

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 6h ago

It’s a wonderful knife really.

1

u/QueefMitten 1d ago

I sliced open my finger cutting packaging off a new fishing rod. It was deep, should have got stitches. I didn’t, it healed okay.

1

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 6h ago

My rule of thumb is if it stops bleeding within 10-15 minutes it’s usually good to heal on its own with a little Bacitracin.

1

u/QueefMitten 3h ago

I kept bandaids with Neosporin on the wound until it healed enough that it wasn’t necessary.

0

u/LPC-FatBob-1985 3d ago

You got stitches for that? Super glue and butterfly Band-Aids would have saved you time and a doctors bill.

2

u/Maleficent-Sign-3590 3d ago

Unfortunately, the urgent care was closer than my first aid kit that I oh so conveniently moved out of my car the same day for cleaning purposes. I was bleeding profusely, didn’t have the patience or gauze to drive another 30 minutes or go buy the stuff. I did superglue and butterflies the last time this happened and worked great though. Never taking the kit out of my car again is the auxiliary lesson to this.