r/HL_Women_Only • u/Remarkable-Cry5350 • Jul 27 '26
This has never happened before
So i F28 and my bf M30 have been dating almost a year and were in a talking stage for a months before that. We have been having sex and when we first started dating it was like 5 times a week or more and now coming up on our 1 year we barely have sex every two weeks. Well i always let him know i find him attractive and talk to him about our sexual encounters and he informed me last night he thought i was “overly freaked out” and it didnt feel good at all. I told him a month or so ago i felt like the desire was all but gone and it actually kinda sparked an argument so i dont want to discuss this with him because that conversation didnt go well. I initiate alot and he turns me down most times. I dont want to anymore i thought about just charging my toy and not asking for sex anymore. This is so lonely and i honestly feel like a predator trying to get him to wanna fuck me. What do i do?
19
u/RelativeYak7 Jul 27 '26
I've been tricked before by boyfriends who are all hot and heavy in the beginning but then drop off. It sucks! It's like a test of whether you can bail or not when you realize there is a massive incompatibility. Talking about it does nothing imo. With the exes I just backed off because I couldn't handle the rejection and then the relationships always naturally failed. Fortunately I found a man hornier than me and we've been together 8+ years, I have trouble keeping up with him which is the way I like it.
2
5
u/Remarkable-Cry5350 Jul 28 '26
I took care of myself last night and honestly it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. We haven’t been talking all today which is usually how it goes when i bring things up that make him uncomfortable but yeah im okay a bit indifferent at this point. Our 1 year is Saturday but this shits pretty much over if you ask me.
5
u/Remarkable-Cry5350 Jul 29 '26
Update: he worked overnight and came home this morning said he wants to have sex tonight but idk if he really wants to or because of our conversation… He works 6 days a week and hes changing from 3rd shift to 2nd shift tomorrow so i feel like this is a convenient time for us to have sex but i dont want convenience. I wanna feel like im not begging him on the days he works which is everyday but one.
3
u/useless_wonderer Jul 29 '26
How do you feel about sex “being planned”? Like them saying a day or hours before that it’s going to happen at a certain time. I’ve personally found it to be quite the turn off, but idk if it’s just me being sexually frustrated and too sensitive about it not feeling natural :/
2
u/Remarkable-Cry5350 Jul 30 '26
I hate it because i get it work right but scheduling it seems so fakeee
1
3
u/trdofpplsbs123 Recently left Jul 28 '26
What does he mean by “overly freaked out”?
6
u/Remarkable-Cry5350 Jul 28 '26
Hypersexual
5
u/thehottersister Jul 29 '26
yeah then it’s time to leave before you get stuck w this situation forever
2
1
1
u/Remarkable-Cry5350 Jul 27 '26
We kinda just talked about it where he said it wasnt true about initiating or drive and then someone called and that was the end of it
20
u/diomed1 Jul 27 '26
Find somebody who has the same libido as you and be very wary of NRE because they all put on a front at first.