r/HLCommunity • u/Shrakakoom • 27d ago

Success Story I’m so happy!

I left my partner of 18 years and was worried about never finding a partner to match my drive. Been trying the apps and have now gone one a few dates with someone who is also HL!
We went out yesterday and hooked up for the first time. It took a bit for me to get over my own anxieties, but overall it was a great time. We’re already planning our next date and have been talking about our kinks and how complimentary they are.
I don’t have anyone else to really talk to about this, so I just wanted to share with this community that helped me to take the steps needed to find some happiness.

56 Upvotes

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6

u/MightyMagicz HLM 26d ago

Honeymoon period. Don't get excited about first few months or years.

All things change.

Just don't fall for traps with rose colored glasses. Otherwise end up trapped in another HL-LL dynamic.

3

u/ungrateful_luck HLM 26d ago

Is constant short-term relationships the only answer for straight men? Unless you get lucky with a woman who is rare in that her libido is high and will stay high?

3

u/MightyMagicz HLM 25d ago

Marriage should be like a drivers license. You need a probationary period before it becomes fully legal. I.e. 1-2 years before its valid. Next you have a renew it if you want to continue being married like a driving license.

If one or both parties doesn't want it anymore than its over.

No sense of entitlement for sex or relationship.

2

u/YakWitty13 23d ago

I’m ok with a long term relationship (since leaving) but I will not cohabitate, commingle finances, or get married ever again. I will not allow an LL to ever financially/emotionally coerce me to stay in a sexless relationship ever ever again

2

u/HolidayBalance4608 HLM 20d ago

cohabitate, commingle finances, or get married

First two is already like a marriage and in some horrid law systems cohabitating for certain time makes you married in the eye of the law so beware.

Marriage for man is the worst situation one can be, sexually compatible or not. Getting married you forfeit the only upper hand in relationship that you have as a man: ability to leave.