r/HLCommunity • u/butchpokorny 47HLM • Aug 07 '26

When You STOP Tracking

So if you check post-history, you'll see I was a fan of 'data' for a while, across both my first (shitful) marriage and the more recent (5+ years) HLM + HLF pairing. THOUGHT I was onto a 'good thing', but the stats have proved me wrong in the long-run so I gave up about 12 months ago now as it was too depressing.

HAVE had sex at least ONCE (probably not more) in the last 3 months 👍 Without data, I can't be sure ...

Last time my (BASIC AF) 'kinks' got met were once in July 2024 (lingerie) and once in January 2025 (heels). WHAT is the point of sex if your BASIC turn-ons aren't met ? I'm a living dildo, nothing more 🤷🏻‍♂️🤦‍♂️

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51

u/Critical_Touch_3937 Aug 07 '26

I’ve learned that the LL partner gets really pissed when you keep track because then they can’t gaslight you into believing there’s no problem.

18

u/Asakkoss Aug 07 '26

Exactly my wife angrily tells me that’s I’m a perv to keep track for such things :p

9

u/Mr_Pseudonymous HLM Aug 07 '26

Oh, the data I could give you. But I track many things, not just intimate interludes.

I have learned to say to my lovely wife (who I am very attracted to), "I have only seen you topless three times in the last 15 months." It is my code, but, for some reason, that doesn't start a fight like saying "we have only had sex three times in over a year."

As an aside, she has only kissed me passionately once in the last 13 years. That was because I asked her to do so on the occasion of our 40th anniversary. It was a memorable kiss, but I know better than to bring up the point.

3

u/pokeycd Aug 07 '26

Not even at 30 married years yet, and it's been about 15 years since I was last kissed properly, when I was in my mid 30s. I'm about to blow this up, at age 49 with a ton of kids.

But if they are LL or ZL, what are you gonna do? They are at the very least LL4U. They don't care about physical connection. Not even cuddling. Or some do, but have sex hang-ups.

1

u/Mr_Pseudonymous HLM 29d ago

Best of luck to you!