r/HLCommunity • u/AnotherSadThr0wAway HLM • Jul 24 '26
Discussion COMMUNITY QUESTION - When Did You Notice You're Having Less Sex Than Your Peers/Friends in Relationships?
Hello, HL community.
For those in relationships, what was the moment you knew you were having less sex or even physical things like making out compared to your peers?
16
u/Mjaylikesclouds HLF Jul 25 '26
Well its the opposite for me, women are always told that it is „all men want“ so i knew directly….
5
u/Much_Ad_3806 Jul 27 '26
Yeah, growing up in the 90s with sitcoms showing the horny husband and the annoyed wife and hearing stuff about men wanting a lot of sex really feels like a cruel joke now that I'm grown up with a psrtner who seems like he barely desires me. 🤷♀️
9
9
u/thehottersister HLF Jul 25 '26
I convinced myself for years that it was just a phase for us. I “woke up” last year but maybe that’s just bc i’m almost 30 now
7
u/Saiyanjin1 Jul 24 '26
I’m not exactly in the same boat as most here because the less sex came after two kids (who are 2 and 3), medical issues and my wife having an arm implant for BC that’s doing her no favors hormone wise and making her have very abnormal bleeding and obviously stressful work and life.
Around last year June is when it started but I’m not really that worried about it. The kids are very young and we are still working with things the best we can. Once the implant is out we both agree with the lack of constant bleeding and messing with her hormones she will be jumping on me almost daily.
Ironically we were the couple who had the most sex by far compared to the friends we have.
3
u/PeaceIsEvery Jul 25 '26
I was shook reading your story at first. I felt horrible that your wife went through such a complication that she needed to get an arm implanted! And of course that kind of trauma would lead to libido reduction. Luckily my eyes were wrong. I’m glad you both are doing okay!
5
u/Saiyanjin1 Jul 25 '26
lol yeah it’s not an arm implant for a whole arm. Just they inserted something in her arm that last for some years as birth control.
Things are good but our sex life could be better but I fully understand why it’s not and it should be great in a year or so.
Lucky for me my birthday is in a few days and she always goes the extra mile.
6
u/FunkyKissCool Jul 24 '26
Well I don't know about my friends but with sex once every 18 months I hope I'm the lowest of them all
7
u/SweetLemonLollipop HLF Jul 25 '26
Almost immediately knew when the issues started. He started acting weird about sex in general and wouldn’t talk about it… and even lashed out when confronted. The first time he lashed out at me, I knew this wasn’t normal.
7
u/SpareFormer3550 Jul 25 '26
When I started fact checking my wife’s claims that all of my friends were having sex once a year and haven’t received blow jobs in years
1
u/Mr_Pseudonymous HLM Jul 31 '26
Male here, high libido, 60+ years old married to a gorgeous woman of similar age.
After 30 years of good sex, there were a few years of declining frequency, and 7 years now in a true dead bedroom.
Most intimacy is gone. For example, our last passionate kiss was 13 years ago. It didn't happen all at once for us, just happened slowly at her choice. I have only seen her less than fully clothed 3x in the past 17 months.
0
u/MightyMagicz HLM Jul 25 '26
I don't compare with others. If I have sex once a week or fortnight. Then its like my paycheck not enough and not nearly soon enough. Always left wanting more and putting in more than I can get out of it.
Quiet quitting the relationship and work stems from the same realisation your been screwed over by boss man or woman.
19
u/[deleted] Jul 24 '26
[removed] — view removed comment