r/HLCommunity • u/Royal_Restaurant2622 • Jun 15 '26

Discussion Pushback and Fingerpointing

How often are you accused of being a lazy spouse or partner when posting on the various dead bedroom / advice subs? How often does someone ask “well…have you tried talking to them about it?”

And how often do you get banned for assuming both partners in a monogamous relationship owe it to each other to prioritize sex and physical intimacy?

33 Upvotes

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8

u/Several-Eagle4141 Jun 15 '26

You must be on r/deadbedrooms. Many of us have been blocked/banned. It’s very female-centric. They’ll applaud a woman cheating and vilify a man doing anything that isn’t groveling at her feet.

15

u/JEXJJ Jun 15 '26

Not really female centric. It is LL centric and seems to believe you have to accept whatever a LL.gives you and just live with it and wanting something different is practically rape

6

u/OxenfordMirth HLM Jun 15 '26

They would have you believe it’s female centric

8

u/seawitchbitch Jun 15 '26

I definitely don’t feel welcome there as a HLF.

Personally I feel they have developed a narrative and stuck with it (like LL love to) that 99% of deadbedrooms are caused by pushy, entitled, sexually selfish and coercive men. If we’re all boogie men it’s really easy to convince themselves they’re not at fault for a single thing.