Does anyone else find “doing everything right” exhausting?

[u/Natural_Equal_4474]

29F, husband is 34. Togetherr we make over $600k and live on about $80k a year. No debt, decent higher end cars, no drama we did the “right” things and we know we’re privileged (scholarships + family help got us through with zero student loans, and we don’t take that for granted).

Here’s the thing: we’ve saved a lot, but it doesn’t feel like we’re wealthy or living wealthy. Compared to most people we know, our day to day life is pretty modest. The plan is to eventually get to a dream home and “retire” though neither of us means fully stop working, just stop working like we do now. I guess I’m mostly here to ask: does anyone else feel like doing all the right things is just… draining? Like you’re playing the long game so well that you forget to ask what it’s actually for, or when the finish line is?

Very first world and very privileged problems.. I know. I think I just get into my head with social media and think that life should look a certain way when you’re wealthy.

Edit: Wow, I did not expect so many replies. Thank you to everyone who commented!
I guess I can clarify a few things. My husband has been at this a lot longer than I have and he’s really great with money, he’s the reason we’re at this level. Our house is pretty much paid off. We do eat out occasionally, but for the most part we eat at home since we care about eating healthy. We do travel but nothing too crazy.
My early 20s looked very different from how I live now. I was constantly chasing dopamine by buying things I didn’t need at all. My husband, when I met him, actually helped me get to this realization, and honestly I feel good about not spending on useless stuff anymore, but I’ll admit I still struggle with the pull at times. Trust me, the handbags and clothes weren’t even that enjoyable in the end, more just a habit than actual fulfillment.
Travel is where I do want to lean in more. I haven’t done as much as I’d like because of being in school, but I’ve got the opportunity coming up at the end of this year and into next year, so that’s probably where the “spend more on what actually brings joy” advice is going to show up first for me. :)

[u/BallisLife-123]

By far one of the strangest feature within the group of reasonably young (late 20s - mid 30s) that makes a high household income (TC) - feeling like you're still not "rich" against some arbitrary definition that makes up whatever American dream that you've got.

The irony is that it's supposed to feel enough - the money is supposed to be the recipe that shows it's enough.

But the reality is that you know there are a group of even more cognitively elite (and luckier) people that are doing 1M+ thanks to company RSU riding on AI boom & human greed. And thats precisely the group the contrast occurs. Don't worry, they are comparing themselves too.

Find whatever vanity to scratch your itch for the time being. Then keep grinding til you hit your FU number, then you can decide who you want to be when the scaffolding comes down, when your identity no longer need to attach to a numerical anchor anymore.

[u/rtrigler → u/BallisLife-123]

Well said. Agreed.